Behind the Scenes

Author's note:

Hey guys, this is my first time doing this. I've spent a lot of time reading stories on this website and wanted to try and write a tale myself. This story is going to have multiple chapters, at least into the 20's the way I'm looking at it right now.

Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments, I'd appreciate the feedback.

This story contains sex between people of the same gender, you have been warned.

Enjoy!

Chapter 1

Leo's POV:

'Thanks Chei, and happy birthday!' I yelled over my shoulder as I ran out of the supermarket. The old man waved at me and smiled.

I jumped on my bike, one shopping bag in each hand and rode away hands-free. The haste and speed at which I was moving may have led onlookers to believe that I was trying to beat the unpredictable Amsterdam weather, but I had other reasons.

In a few minutes I would get a call-back from the casting director of a movie I auditioned for three weeks ago. Today I'd hear wether I was chosen for the part, or not.

When I reached my apartment I shoved my bike in the storage room, threw my bags on the counter and nervously sat on the couch. I carefully laid my phone on the coffee table in front of me and waited, fingers twiddling and my right leg bouncing up and down as it often does when I'm nervous, or excited, or restless.

This phone call could mean

so

much or

so

little. The anticipation was killing me.

---

And it was the quickest phone call of my life. So quick that it took me about half an hour to realise it was real, long after I had hung up. I found myself needing to check the facts on the production company's website, and then again on the studio's newsfeed.

However, despite all my expectations and beyond my wildest dreams, it was true. I got to play a part in an upcoming featured film!

I had

never

done anything like this before in my entire life. Acting was all new to me, but it was also a big dream so I thought I would finally try after I finished school, barely twenty-one years old, and they

liked

me. Bless the director for letting completely unexperienced ambitionairres try out for an audition. The opportunity of a lifetime it was.

Still, there was something gnawing at my conscience and telling me not to get too excited, not to lose my head and to remain humbled, patient and above all else; proffesional.

The thing was, I knew that almost all of my scenes would involve one particular co-star, so to speak. I had actually never met him before. Not during the audition, not during the screentest. But boy did I know him. His name was Connor Dexter, I knew him from a handful of tv-shows, and I used to have a major celebrity crush on him.

And I was going to have to meet him, work with him and act like I never imagined him in a sexual scenario. Which I was both extatic and terrified about. Today was the day though, that I was going to have at least some sort of contact with him. The casting director and the director of the film both thought it would be good for us to get to know each other in order to be able to have some sort of chemistry on screen, since we're supposed to be best friends and partners in crime...

And nothing more than that, I reminded myself.

After the phone-call I had immediately received an e-mail which stated that Connor had been given my phone number so we could contact each other easily. I would have preferred to have been given Connor's number instead. That way I could make the first move which would have spared me the sweaty palms and racing thoughts that I had to deal with as soon as I'd realised Connor could tekst me, ring me up or God forbid, video-call me at any given moment now.

I was surprised to find myself even more nervous than an hour ago.

I knew at least that he was supposed to contact me sometime today. And saying I was melting into a puddle of twitchy anxiety on my sofa would be an understatement.

I felt like I was about to give a highschool presentation, or at least that's the only situation I could recall when I'd felt this shaky. I remembered the mantra that used to flow through my head during the minutes preceding such a presentation: Fuck fuck fuck.

The same mantra was roaming around in my brain right then. What was I going to do? I hadn't thought about Connor since fifth grade. Since he made me realise I'm gay. I looked him up a few days ago on Instagram when I was informed that there was a good chance that I would be chosen for the part, and damn was he gorgeous. Just like I remembered him.

And he was grown up now. Not just cute, but handsome. Not slim and sweet, but filled out and sexy. Not attractive, oh no, but irresistable.

The pictures of him in the gym really re-ignited that old crush I had on him. His hair was lightbrown and perfect. Handsome face, cheekbones, jawline, full lips and the deepest, most mesmerising hazel eyes I had ever seen. Those eyes, they seemed to be the only two things that hadn't changed.

Oh, I was doomed of course, I immediately felt those happy feelings creep up inside me again. And I hadn't even met him. I was hopeless. A teenager once more. Helpless, pathetic and weak to the powers of attraction and lust. What was I going to do? Was it even worth pretending that-

*Bzzz*

That was a text message.

Yes

. I decided in that moment. It

was

worth pretending that all of those feelings tormenting me didn't exist.

Acting was a long standing dream, and it could not be compared to a an old teenage crush coming back to haunt me.

I unlocked my phone and saw that it was a text from an unkown number.

Fuck

.

Unknown Number:

Hey, Leonard I hope? It's Connor, your co-star on the movie. Ms. Hester gave me your phone number, I hope u don't mind. I just thought that if they want us 2 get 2 know each other, let's give them what they want, right? Text me sometime K? ;)

Okay that was nice, his text was nice. The fact that he used my full and not-so-sexy first name extinguished most of the fantasies that were occupying my thoughts. My heart skipped a beat at the

*wink*

emoji, though. Time to get your act together Leo.

Leo:

Hey Connor, It's Leo. I'm really excited for the film and I'd really like to meet you too. Let's talk when we have some time to spare!

I immediately regretted replying so quickly without thinking. It made me look extremely desperate probably. But the text itself was okay right? I basically said the same thing as him. And-

*Bzzz*

What? Was that

him

? Already?

Connor:

How about we talk right now? U got time?

Oh shit.

Leo:

Yeah sure, I got time :).

What?!

Connor:

Great! I'll video-call you! I wonder if you look anything like your Instagram pics. Sorry for stalking.

He looked up my Instagram account. Great. Well, there were at least some decent pictures of me on there, but now?

I looked like a bag of potatoes. I just came out of the rain, I was wearing an old T-shirt and my hair, which was really nothing special to begin with, looked like a chicken had slept in it.

He can't see me like this

, I thought. He'll think I'm ugly, sloppy and unprofessional. He probably looks amazing and fresh out of the gym or something. But I wasn't allowed to panic for another second because the familiar sound of Stevie Wonder's

I Just Called To Say I Love You

echoed through my room.

I answered the call, not wanting to keep him waiting. Frantically trying to get my hair to look respectable by shoving my fingers in it, I was met with the most gorgeous sight I'd seen that month, maybe even that whole year. Or longer still.

Connor looked amazing, his messy brown hair, his broad shoulders and big arms on display. His pumped chest hugged tightly by his white slim-fit tanktop. His perfect white bright smile crawling up his face all the way up to his mesmerisisng deep hazel-coloured eyes. It took me a moment to realise he had said something.

'Hey! Can you hear me? Bad connection?' He said, still smiling. I coughed.

'What, uhm- No! Just zoned out for a second.' Yeah, great going you idiot.

'Right,' he said, still smiling brightly at me. 'Why don't you take a picture? It'll last longer.' And then he winked,

damn it!

'Yeah right, haha. You're a funny guy hm?'

'You think so?'

'No, that was my obvious sarcasm flowing through your smartphone screen.'

'Oh, that's what that was? If you say so. I thought it was just your baby blues spacing a little.' That smirk on his face was still teasing me. My eyes definitely weren't

baby blue.

What was he playing at? What was going on? Was I flirting with him? Or was he flirting with me?

Or was I just being a fool? Yes that was it, undoubtedly.

Connor had a practiced confidence about him and appeared to be very comfortable. As for me, for lack of a better word, I was

hella

nervous and decided to try and go along with him.

Remain professional, but cool. Be yourself, don't be obvious. Having romantic as well as hot and heavy fantasies about the man in front of me was the last thing on the list of things that would be wise for me to do.

Getting my hopes up with a straight guy who most likely had a girlfriend, according to his Instagram page that I definitely did not stalk, was bound to get rid of all the opportunities and chances I had received just an hour ago.

So again I reminded myself;

Get your act together Leo.

'Uhm.. my eyes are actually dark blue, a little grey even. Not much to look at. So uhh... how are you doing?' I uttered nervously. Well, I

was

trying at the very least.

Connor seemed like he wanted to argue about my eyes. I imagined that he wanted to argue the point of me saying they weren't much to look at. But I knew that he, of course, wanted to argue about what he clearly saw as baby blue.

As a superstar he must not be told to be wrong at all. But he didn't pinch the subject any further.

'I'm doing okay, you? Just finished my workout for the day, going for some ice cream with a friend later, so.' Connor said, the tone of his voice slightly bored. I immediately became curious, which came out as nosy when I asked my next question.

'You're not looking forward to it? I see the sun is shining over there. I haven't had ice cream weather in three months! Who are you going with?' The latter, of course being my

actual

question. I wanted to know if he was hanging out with friends... or a girlfriend. Curiosity isn't a sin, right? And I figured I would be better of knowing of his supposed girlfriend beforehand instead of being surprised by her.

Acting as if I didn't find Connor the most attractive man to have ever been born whilst working with him daily would be a lot easier if I knew as much about him as possible beforehand, I decided.

Connor scratched the back of his head, his bicep bulging with the motion, making me gasp silently. I noticed that I was not only turned on, but also slightly jealous of his body.

I do take care of myself. I work out and go for a run three times a week, which has me looking lean and toned. My muscles may be more visible on my body, but Connor's looked much bigger in his pictures. Bulky. He was the perfect combination of muscular and cuddly. Just the way I like it. I just can't seem to eat lots of calories, carbs and protein and live a normal life. Well, I

can

, but it just goes around the track too quick for my body to benefit from it.

Having the perfect body and living a normal life was an impossible task for me. And when you're gay these days, the perfect body, or something close to it is quite essential. If you're a fan of sex at least, and that I am.

I wasn't a fool. Of course I knew that a big part Connor's life consisted solely out of looking perfect. Without a doubt, I knew that he had all the recourses, personal trainers, equipment and above all else,

time

to look like he did. But still.

I was impressed.

I looked back at Connor's hesitant eyes before completely zoning out on his arms.

'She's... she's a friend of mine, my girlfriend actually, Caytlin. She seems a bit different lately that's all.' He looked at me through the camera for a while, then a look of curiosity to match my own came over his face.

'Do you have a girlfriend?' I noticed he didn't really feel like talking about his own girlfriend.

I hesitated before telling him... well telling him

anything

about that part of my life. Best to keep that a secret. At least for now.

'Nope, no girlfriend right now.' I said silently. A smirk flashed across Connors face before he redeemes himself and looked bored again.

'Oh, so no cute girls over there in Holland?' He asked. I smiled.

'It's the Netherlands, actually. Holland is just a small part of it.' I evaded the question.

Connor seemed to be a little taken aback by what I said, and he did his expression justice.

'Is that true? I thought it was just Amsterdam and Holland. Do all of you people speak English in that British accent like you do?' He exclaimed, rambling on with his questions. His voice sounded so cute and curious. And I jumped at the chance of talking about everything but girls.

'Nahh, not everyone. Mostly, I learned from television and reading. The accent came naturally. You pick it up along the way.' I said. Connor seemed impressed with me and I had trouble repressing a smirk. There's just something about your teenage heartthrob being impressed with you that lights you up.

'So, how's it hanging in Holland... uh... The Netherlands then?' He asked. I could hear he was trying to get his cool voice and demeanor back after slipping up and frantically asking me all those questions.

'It's okay here I guess, except for the weather. Just hanging out waiting for my plane ride to the promised land of opportunity.' I really was excited for it all.

'So are you nervous? I hear you've never been in a movie before.' He looked curious when he asked that. And a little worried, but he was just being nice, I think.

'Well, kind of. I've never even acted before. But I'm really looking forward to it also. More excited than nervous, I suppose.'

'Never acted before? You must be a natural if they chose you for a lead part then!' Connor exclaimed.

This was going well, I didn't feel as nervous talking to him as I'd thought I would. Talking to him wasn't so difficult. The opposite was true, Connor was

easy

to talk to, and he seemed genuinely interested in... well me. Just as much as I was in him. In the end we talked for about another two hours before he had to go get ice cream with Caytlin.

We laughed a lot which I was very happy about, I considered laughing to be a hobby of mine. One that I hadn't had much time for lately, I chalked it down to sheer fate that Connor was the one to make me chuckle and giggle again. He also told me about his life in California. He grew up and still lived there with his family. I told him more about my own life in return. Although I was being a tad more reserved about my childhood.

His life had, of course, consisted mostly out of acting and modelling, mine had been more

ordinairy

for lack of a better word. Highschool, uni and work. In a nutshell, we got along really well and I had to be cautious not to appear to be into him too much.

He had a girlfriend, even if she was complicated. He was definitely not into me or any other guy that way.

About half an hour later, which was spent by him talking and me trying not to get a boner, he had to leave to spend time with Caybitch... uh.. Caytlin.

Don't start.

Although I had a feeling the nickname was rather accurate. Even if I hadn't met her at all.

'So, I'll hit you up soon okay? Maybe tonight?' Connor asked.

I looked back at the screen and saw him standing with his back towards me, rummaging through a dresser. He had set his phone upright against a book on his desk or something. I got a nice view of his room.

It was about the same size as mine, pretty large and plenty of space with one big window. It was a standard teenage boy room with blue and white wallpaper, mostly black furniture, a queensized bed, a tv and Playstation 3, 4, 5 or 6.

Which one are they on now? I'm more of an Xbox guy anyway.

He had a nice stereo so he must like music as well which was a big plus. No instruments though. The only thing that really stood out to me were the dozens of car and motorcycle posters.

Cute, he has a fetish

, I thought. His helmet and leather motorcycle attire were hanging on the door and I needed a lot of self-control not to imagine him in it. Or

partly

in it.

But then something else caught my eye, and no amount of self-control could stop my little Leo from going full mast at the sight of it. A white Calvin Klein jockstrap. Oh man.

Jockstraps weren't really a thing where I came from. They are not used in football, or

soccer,

as I was sure I'd have to call it when talking to Connor. But

damn

if I didn't find them sexy. My mouth watered at the image of Connor sporting that jockstrap and slowly and sexily stalking towards me as I was leaning back against his bedpost. His rocking body on full display.

'Leo? You there?'

'W-what? Oh! Yeah, yes of course. Tonight is fine Con! I'll be waiting.' I just about managed to blurt out.

I checked wether he had turned his head back towards the camera because I really needed to adjust my member. At that moment Connor decided to enter the frame again.

Shirtless.

Oh

shit

.

'Are you okay there dude?' That raised eyebrow and smirk didn't help. Nothing he did helped.

'Uh.. y-yeah. Yeah I'm oookayyy.' I coughed. This was

not

a good end to this conversation.

'Good. So I'll call you. It'll probably be morning over there so I'll make sure not to wake you up too early yeah?' He started to cover himself with an oversized grey sweater. Cute yes, but not... sexy, or flattering in any way. Why? He was going to see his girl right?

'Oh right. Thanks.' I said. Being able to speak again. 'Have fun with your date.'

'Yeah thanks Leo, see ya.' God, the way he says my name. That was about the last straw.

'See you later Connor.' I replied quickly before breaking the connection.

I groaned loudly and buried my face in my bedsheets.

Fuck

.

I couldn't even remember the last time I was so hooked on a guy so fast. Or a girl for that matter. I wondered if I was maybe exaggerating a little, but the pole in my jeans proved otherwise.

I hadn't been getting a lot of sex lately. I didn't really know why either because I found it quite a pleasant pastime. Another hobby I guess you could say.

It probably had something to do with the fact that I wasn't that fond of a hook-up or a one night stand. Or maybe it was because I still had to be completely comfortable with liking guys instead of girls. Which I wasn't yet. At least not for the full one hundred percent.

That crush I used to have on Connor, that had been just short of three years ago. When I first found out about the fact that a guy could make my heart beat out of my chest. Back then I thought that a simple boner was the deepest feeling anyone could ever feel towards anyone else. That caused me to think love and all of that was highly exaggerated by tv shows, movies, books and my friends who were getting girlfriends. But that was the problem of course. Girls. I had been solely focussed on girls. All my friends were and everyone else around me that was in possession of a penis was, so I never thought to look further into it. The disappointing feeling when I had sex with a girl for the first time was just a part of life I guessed. Even the climax itself had been anti-climactic. That deep romance and connection must not be for everyone.