****The following story is fiction, and all characters are over the age of 18****
The Thief
The sound of a dog barking alerted me. It was two houses away. The small neighborhood had three dogs. A Doberman at the end of the street, a pomeranian, and the house that owned the barking dog had a pit bull. I paused what I was doing and turned to the window. I narrowed my eyes into a slit and watched for anyone walking down the sidewalk. I glanced at my watch, and the mailman was right on time. It was a little past 9 am. The middle-aged, thin mailman climbed the steps with my eyes watching him like a hawk. I was able to see him, but he was not able to see me. He fished through his giant sack, brought out a handful of mail, and tucked it into the mailbox. He scanned a box and left it on the chair on the porch; then, he walked down the three steps of the stairs.
When the mailman disappeared down the street, I returned to what I was doing: cracking a safe. I had been a thief for about five years since I was 15. My parents had money, but they rarely shared it with me. My older siblings got most of the money. While my brother, Jarred, got a new car, I had to go work my ass off at a shit retail store and endure a period of toxicity to buy myself a car. It was a beat-up 2004 black Toyota Corolla. It did its job, though. When my sister, Claudia, got a new laptop for college, I had to go to work and make some extra cash to buy myself one. I was the youngest, so I got the hand-me-downs and the neglect. I needed to get out of the house. My mother and father always argued divorce was inevitable. It's why I turned to the life of burglary; I had to make extra cash to move out.
Slowly my fingers turned the knob of the safe clockwise, and then I heard a click; I had finally unlocked the safe. I opened the door and began searching the safe's contents. The only person in my family that I loved was my Uncle Jerry. Jerry, the second, is my father's older brother. He had nothing, but he appreciated everything. He taught me everything I know. What helped me even more with the modern security tech was working for a security company. There, I discovered the security systems' failsafe and weak points. Uncle Jerry was also the only person I had come out to in my family. He didn't care; he loved me for who I was. The day I finally left this part of town would be challenging because of him.
The safe contained a few valuable things: jewelry, cash, important documents, and a handgun. The last item struck me. I knew the couple that lived here. They moved in five years ago. During the 2020 election, they put Biden/Harris stands on their lawn. The couple was young in their early 30s. I recalled a conversation with them about them being against guns, yet here I was, staring at a handgun. I grew up in my neighborhood all my life, and people started to die off or move away over the years. All these homes were built in the 1920s. Many of the residents had been living here for decades. Now, all the young millennials were moving in. My father always complained about them, but I wouldn't have to hear it much longer.
I grabbed the wad of cash and looked through each bill carefully with my gloved hand. No traps. It was rare, but people did put traps in their money sometimes. I grabbed the cash and stuffed it into my briefs. It was always an excellent place to hide money. I closed the safe and went to the drawer across the bed, which held up the couple's 55-inch television. I opened the top drawer and found the man's clothing. It was his underwear drawer. Steven, the husband, was a good-looking guy. Tall and thin, with an athletic build. The hair on his body was barely like a peach. The man had a nice butt too. Carefully, I looked through his underwear, moving around socks and pairs of boxer briefs. Unfortunately, I found nothing in his underwear drawer. I moved to the other drawers and found nothing. I looked at my watch, and I was running out of time. The security system blocker was going to run out of juice soon.
Quickly, I went to the wife's drawer. Her name was Miranda. She was charming and always made delicious cherry pies--but nothing was in her drawer. I returned to Steven's underwear drawer and looked for a nice pair to steal. The man only wore boxer briefs and trunks, but I remember seeing brief lines in his shorts once. After a thorough search, I pulled out a gray pair of briefs and stuffed them into my shoulder bag. It was time to get out.
I quickly scanned the room to ensure nothing was out of order. Then, I went to the living room to see if anyone was walking by outside. It was clear. I went to the back door, put my hoodie over my head, and wore sunglasses. I opened the back door and stepped out, then reactivated the security system remotely through my device. I walked across the lawn and jumped over the back fence onto the alley.
As I approached the end of the alley, I removed my hoodie. I turned onto the sidewalk and headed north. My house was a 30-minute walk. I was used to walking due to all the walking I did before a car.
I crossed two blocks of neighborhoods and entered a park. Walking through the park, I noticed something from the corner of my eye--a group of guys. I turned slightly to see who they were: Jack and two friends. Jack was my bully from high school. I looked forward and increased my walking speed. I could hear voices from the group; they were coming for me. It had been two years since we graduated, and this guy still continuously harassed me. I went from a jog straight into a run. I needed to get away from this loser and his friends.
Safety was on the horizon as I saw the train track arms go down, which meant a freight train was coming. I continued to run out of the park. As I approached the end, I collided with something. Instead, something collided with me. I fell to the ground hard. A body was on me; I turned to see it was Thomas--my high school track star. There was no way I was going to run him out. The other two arrived out of breath. Thomas stood up as Jack stood over my body; he grabbed me by the shirt and lifted my thin body off the ground. Jack was on the football team in high school. He was a muscular man. Jack held me up by my shirt; my feet hovered over the grass by a few inches. "Why are you running?" he said to me.
"Running from your pertred stench," I said sarcastically.
Jack's pale face flashed red, and then I felt his fist in my gut. I lurched forward and groaned. He dropped me to the ground as I cried out in pain. It was a good thing I hadn't eaten anything. Jack squatted over me, "You think you're funny?"
"I'm a fucking comedian," I forced a grin. Jack was a piece of shit that was going nowhere in life. It's why I was never afraid of him. Jack grabbed my shoulder bag and held it up, "This is a nice bag I'm going to borrow. I'll give it back..." he paused. "Maybe in a few years when I need a new one."
Rage filled me, and I lifted myself off the ground. I lept towards Jack but never made contact. Thomas' lightning-quick reaction grabbed me from the waist and held me back. Jack stood inches from me, "You think you can swing at me? With those tiny arms of yours?"
"Fuck..." I began to say but was interrupted by another strike to the gut from Jack. Thomas released my arms, and I brought them to my stomach. I hunched over in pain; then I felt hands in my pants. Jack grabbed the waistband of my briefs and tugged on them. He pulled so hard the wedgie lifted me off the ground, and I fell onto my stomach. The three guys laughed as they walked away.
I lay on the grass in pain from my stomach and my ass. I thought to myself, "Who the fuck still does wedgies?" Slowly, I rolled onto my back and stared up at the trees. I heard the roar of the freight train; I felt the rumblings of the heavy vehicle as it drove by.
"I loved that backpack," I said to myself. I need to get it back. Not only was my stuff in that bag, but so was the pair of briefs I stole. "I need to get it back."