I'm thirty-five years old and I am bored with life. Work is fine. I have a good group of friends. I've dated a lot of attractive women and had a lot of good sex (as well as some really bad stuff too). But I still felt like my life was missing something. It was missing excitement. I needed to get out of my own comfort zone, but I didn't even know where to begin. Today was a random Saturday in September. It was now around 2:00 p.m. I had plans to go hang out at my friend Nick's house later in the day. Maybe a few beers and an open night would lead to some excitement.
As far back as I can remember, I have always been - how to put this - not 100% straight. I've never "come out" to any family or friends or anything like that. And I never intended to. But, I've always been attracted to both girls and some boys but in different ways. In school, I was like most of the other kids in class flirting with the girls and being just friends with guys. But whenever I had the opportunity, probably even before I even realized it myself, I liked checking out other guys in gym class or in the locker rooms of whatever sports I was playing at that point in my life. I was always fascinated by penises. I loved seeing them hanging between my classmates' legs. They came in all sorts of shapes and sizes and every one is unique.
When I was a freshman in college, we had communal showers in the dorms. We always joked about how lame it was and how we all were adults and should be allowed some actual privacy. But secretly, I loved it. I looked forward each day to jumping under the shower and seeing who was in there already or who would come into shower while I was in there. It made it basically impossible to jerk off in the shower but it sure did provide me with some mental images for later in the day when I was alone.
I vividly remember the times when Mark Williams took a shower at the same time as me. He was my age but by freshman year he was already built like a strong 25 year old athlete. I was enamored by him. To this day, I consider him to be my first male-crush. I jerked off thinking about him many, many times that school year (in fact I still do on occasion). He was around six-foot-two-inches with a broad chest and thick thighs. He had a great head of dark brown hair that looked even sexier when it was wet. His cock was a perfect match for his athletic body.
Unfortunately, I never saw Mark's cock fully erect but there were times that it looked semi-erect in the shower. His pubic hair was trimmed and his balls were completely shaved and smooth. His cock was smooth with a nice thick vein running its length. Everytime I saw it in the shower I felt my own cock twitch with desire. Had I had any doubt about my own sexuality at that time, it would have been erased when I set my eyes on that near perfect young, well endowed man.
I'm a bit of a serial long term dater of women - and I am also loyal. This means I have been able to have regular sex the past 20 years or so with lots of women but never left myself any real openings for true experimentation. I guess what I'm trying to say is I have never been with a guy because I'm almost always dating a female. Which, don't get me wrong, is not necessarily a terrible thing. I love fucking women. I love everything there is to love about women. But there is one thing they have never been able to fulfill for me and that is having a nice big hard cock for me to play with. I am also a lot of talk and no action - I think about cock a lot but I've never really tried to get it. In all honestly, it made me uneasy to even think about doing something about these desires in my real life.
I spent the morning and most of the afternoon cleaning up my apartment and cleaning up myself in the shower as well. It was now 6:00 p.m. and Nick and I had been texting to solidify our plans to hang out at his place then decide what to do from there. I was dressed and ready to roll out. I locked the door to my apartment and walked the three blocks or so to the closest bus stop that would get me close to Nick's apartment, which was due east from me but around three miles away. He lived in more of a younger neighborhood than me with more bars and clubs. I always enjoyed visiting but glad I lived somewhere that was a bit quieter and more low key.
The bus pulled up around five minutes after I got to the stop. I climbed the three stairs to get on, scanned my pass, and walked toward the back of the bus and found myself an open seat next to a window. The bus was only half filled with riders when I got on but continued to get more crowded as we cruised east toward Nick's place. Around half way to my destination, I saw a guy around my own age get on. He was gay - at least I felt he was gay. Maybe bisexual at minimum. He just had that look, which I had become pretty good at figuring out after having lived in the city for the past ten years or so. My gaydar, so to speak, was fairly accurate. I watched him scan his pass to get on the bus. He walked slowly down the aisle and I noticed he saw the empty seat next to me. I hoped to myself that he would choose to take advantage of it and sit next to me.
As he got close to me, he looked down at me and asked, "Mind if I sit here?"
My mind raced. I fantasized about him sitting next to me. We could start chatting and discover how much we have in common. Perhaps he senses my attraction to him and invites me out or back to his place or wherever it is he's going to now. This could be the man I finally give into my desires with.
"Excuse me..." he said it a little louder. "Do mind if I sit here?"
Crap - I thought to myself. I just ignored this man..."Oh sure. Sorry. Please have a seat."
"Thanks," he replied.
He sat down next to me. Our shoulders pressed up against each other. I wondered if he felt it as well. His cologne was subtle but intoxicating. My mind raced with pure fantasy. By now he had pulled out his phone and was looking at god knows what. But he was probably just pretending. I knew he was thinking about me just like I was thinking about him. I cautiously looked down at his lap and I swear I saw a bulge pushing against the zipper of his pants. Deep in my mind I could see his cock growing bigger and harder. I saw a glisten of precum leaking out of the tip of his cock. His six pack abs rippled as my tongue inched its way down his body. He moaned softly at my touch. His intoxicating aroma found its way into my nostrils. I breathed in deeply enjoying his unique scent.
"Hey," he spoke. He said hey to me. This is my opportunity.
"Hey," I replied back and smiled.
"Can you pull the bell for me? My stop is next and I didn't want to just reach over you."
"Oh sure. Of course," I replied. And I pulled the cord. The bell rang signifying to the driver that someone wanted to get off the bus at the next stop.
Christian then stood up as the bus came to a stop. I decided his name was Christian. It sounded sexy to me. I watched Christian stand up and leave. I'd never see him again most likely. I closed my eyes to seal a mental image of his chiseled jawline and wide shoulders into my head. Next time I needed some inspiration, I could use that image and imagine it's his cock shooting a load all over me - even if in reality it was once again just my own cum landing on my body during another lonely jerk session.
My stop was three stops away. I texted Nick to let him know I was getting close. My cock, which I just noticed had gotten very hard behind the confines of my jeans, was starting to soften again now that Christian had left my life. Two minutes later, I pulled the stop cord again - this time for myself - and exited the bus. Nick's apartment was only about a block from the stop so I was there in no time. I let myself into his building and took the stairs up to his third floor apartment. I knocked on the door for apartment number 3C. Seconds later, the door popped open and Nick was there to greet me.
"What's up man?" Nick smiled at me as he opened the door. He was also a perfect host handing me an ice cold can of beer before I even stepped all the way inside.
"Solid. Thank you sir," I replied as I popped the top on the cold metal can and took my first sip of the bitter ale.
"I just picked these up. They're from that new brewery that just opened down the street. Careful though - this thing is strong!" Nick said.
"Good tip," I answered back. And it was a good tip. I examined the can I was drinking from and saw it was a 9% alcohol by volume double IPA. That'll get the party going, I thought to myself.
"Come in, come in. Have a seat," Nick directed me to the couch in his living room. The TV was on and a baseball game was in progress. I did as I was asked and grabbed a seat on the couch, grabbed a coaster, and put my beer down for the moment. Nick walked into his kitchen and appeared to be up to no good.
"Whatcha doing in there?" I asked.
"It's a surprise," Nick answered.
"Bro - I can literally see you. You're pouring us shots. What are we having?"
"Cinnamon whiskey. What else would we have?" Nick said. He finished pouring our shots and came back into the living room and sat down on the couch with me. "Cheers."
"Cheers," I replied back. We both shot our drinks down quickly. No chasers necessary as this stuff was actually pretty damn smooth as far as spicy cinnamon whiskey goes.
I grabbed my double IPA and took another long drink. I saw Nick doing the same thing plus there was what appeared to be an empty can sitting on the kitchen counter.
"You down one beer already?" I asked.
"Yes sir. I got bored waiting for you," Nick laughed.
"I'd suggest I need to catch up but you've always had a higher tolerance than me," I said.
"That's true. You've always been a lightweight," Nick laughed.
"Maybe but all that means is I can get messed up for a lot less money than it takes you!" I replied back.
