It was a very melancholy time for me when I'd moved into my new house. My wife had died about a year prior and so I moved back west to be closer to my children who lived with their mother, my first wife. I was able to afford a small, pleasant house complete with a little bit of yard and a pool and hot tub in the back. It was all that I needed since my kids would still only be visiting me sporadically as they head off to college. My job was mostly a part-time affair since my second wife left me a decent sized estate when she passed away. It was strange to be on my own again after 6 years of marriage, but I'd been on my own plenty before. It'd retired after 22 years at sea as a Master of a commercial tankship, so being alone was nothing new. The good news for me was that at 45 years old, I still looked ok. Six-foot, 195 and the skin care regiment that my late wife insisted upon left me looking 10 years younger.
I'd moved in, met a few of the neighbors, joined the local gym and settled into the life of a bachelor once again. My next door neighbors to the east I'd not met yet. I'd waved to them a couple times as we passed, but I'd not seen them out in front of their house and gone and introduced myself yet. Today, though, I was out in the front of my house mowing the lawn when their car pulled into their driveway. I figured now was as good as a time as any, so I turned off the mower and headed over to say hello.
My neighbors were two black men and they were unloading their groceries from their car when I walked up and said "Hello! I'm your new neighbor, Chris. I moved in just next door and haven't had a chance until now to say hello.". We shook hands and they introduced themselves as George and Mike. George is close to my height and weight and had deep ebony skin. Mike was just a few inches shorter and probably weighed only 150 pounds and had a sort of "feminine" way about him. We talked for a few seconds and then I volunteered to help carry their groceries into their house.
As I dropped off their things, I looked at my watch and said "Well, I need to finish my lawn and clean up before kick-off, so you all have a great day!" George said that they were planning on having their regular friends over for the football games and I'd be welcome to join them. I replied that I'd really appreciate that and I'd be back after a while.
I headed home, finished my lawn and got cleaned up. When I returned to my neighbors, there were 4 other people there watching the game, all males. I was introduced around and offered a drink as I found a place to sit. I'm pretty crap with names, so I just tried to remember the host's names more than anyone else's. We all chatted during the game and I really was enjoying myself after being on my own for a while.
When half-time of the first game arrived, George yelled "HALF-TIME!" and I heard Mike cheer loudly from the kitchen. Mike came walking out, took George by the hand and lead him up the stairs. I got up to use the restroom and when I returned, I was the only one in the room. I looked around and didn't see anyone, so I looked out the front door to see if there were still cars out front. There were, so I got another beer from the fridge and sat down. Eventually, everyone came back in pairs and I began to wonder just what the hell had happened. I asked the guy on the couch next to me where everyone had gone he said "Oh, it's half-time." I said, yes, I know, but where did you all go? His name was Bill and he looked at me and said "Well, we all watch football together each weekend and at half-time, we have a tradition called "Half-time Hummers".
I didn't know what to say, so I said "Ah... Got 'cha" and turned my attention back to the game. As I sat there, I realized that I was with 6 gay guys and they had each paired up and gone into the other rooms for blowjobs. I really didn't know what to do at that point, so I went and got another beer. And then another and another until half-time of the second game came along. "Half-time!" was yelled and once again people started to disappear by twos. Before Mike could head upstairs, I made my excuses to leave and he was kind enough to ask me back the following week. I told him I'd be happy to and went home.
On Monday, I got home from work at about 3pm, took off my clothes and put on my robe to head out to the hot tub for a soak. I'd never once worn a swimming suit in my hot tub because I figured that my back yard was secluded enough that no one would see me. About 15 minutes into a relaxing soak, I heard someone at my back gate saying "Knock-Knock!" I looked over and there was my neighbor Mike waving at me. I told him to come on in and he opened the gate and come over to the hot tub. My robe was hanging on the hook, but I'd have had to get out of the tub to put it on, so I just sat there and tried to act natural knowing that the bubbles would hide most of me. Mike walked over to the edge of the tub and said "Did we frighten you away yesterday? I hope we didn't make you feel uncomfortable."
"Not at all. It's just that I was getting a little drunk and I haven't had sex since my wife died, so I was just feeling a little lonely and headed home. I was having a lot of fun and I like your friends."
"Good. They liked you too and everyone wondered where you went," said Mike. "I just told them that you had to get home and you'd see them all next week. Can you come again next week?"
I told him I'd be there for kick off of the first game at the latest.
He turned to look at my house and said "I never knew the people who lived here before you. They kept to themselves, mostly. Can I get the fifty-cent tour while I'm here?"
"I'd love to show you around, but, ummm, I'm kind of naked right now. "
"Oh," Mike said. "Well, here, I get you your robe" and he picked up my robe off the rack and held it out so I could step into it, rather like a man would hold a woman's coat to help her get it on.
Fresh out of excuses, I stood up and climbed out of the tub. Mike was right in front of me and the when the water level was at about my knees, he pulled the robe down and said "Nice tattoo! " He then bent down toward my waist to inspect the work I'd had done in Singapore years before. It is a tattoo of an anchor, very well done, with the name "GLORIA" written across the top. It's just below my waist line to the right of my groin, so my late wife was the only one to ever see it.
He reached out and touched it and asked "Who's Gloria?"
"That would be my late wife, Michael," and I grabbed my robe and put it on.
"When did you get it done?"
I told him "I had it done in about 5 years ago, right after I'd gotten married. Got it in Singapore from the only tattoo artist I've ever seen that didn't have a tattoo himself."
"Ah, I see. I also see you shave your pubic hair, but not your legs. Why not?"
I looked at him and thought that was a rather odd question, but I told him that I started shaving my pubes at the age of 29 because I had to when I got my vasectomy. I'd done it ever since because I like the way it looks and feels and my late wife really liked it. I didn't shave my legs because I didn't think it would look right when I wore shorts, but I must say I'd thought about shaving my legs more than once.
I lead him into the house and showed him around. The fifty-cent tour took about fifty seconds and I showed him to the door. "See you Sunday!" he said as he left.
Sunday rolled around and walked over to Mike and George's house just about the time the first game was kicking off. I brought a bottle of wine with me and some nibbles I'd put together and as I was walking up the drive, Bill and another man were walking as well. We said hello and I was introduced to Phil. Bill and Phil was something I thought I could remember and we headed to the door. Bill even looked a little bit like Derek Jeter, but the nose was all wrong. He was about 6 foot and 210 and he obviously took good care of himself. George let us in and I found Mike in the kitchen. "Wasn't Bill with someone else last week?" I asked Mike.
"Bill is kind of a player. He brings someone new almost every week," Mike told me.