Ben paced outside the Harris Teeter he worked at part-time. This was crazy, no, insane. Why had he said yes? Stupid so stupid.
It was a bad idea from the very beginning. Going to the BDSM club, then even talking to Eric in the grocery line instead of pretending not to remember him but no, Ben was a horrible liar. He always got twitchy when he tried, so after the first fifteen years of his life he just gave up trying. Now at 22 he still held to that policy of no lying.
A sleek black car pulled up to the curb and a window rolled down. Ben froze and stared at the car as if it would suddenly turn into a transformer at any second.
"Ben, it's just a car, come on. I won't hurt you." Eric called from the driver's seat.
Yeah right, Eric was huge and had an iron grip to match. All the man had to do was reach out a pinky and Ben would snap like a twig.
No, no it's ok, he was just over exaggerating. It would be ok.
Ben edged forward and Eric popped the door open from the inside.
"Hop in. Anything you want to grab before we go?"
Ben shook his head. "No... unless... are we going anywhere I can't wear my work shirt?"
The boy self consciously gulped as Eric looked him up and down, categorizing the dark skinny jeans that looked identical to last night's (they weren't the ones from last night he just had three pairs that looked the same.) up to the Harris Teeter shirt with the logo right over the pocket.
"You look great, besides we're just going back to the club."
"WE'RE GOING TO YOUR CLUB?!" Ben shouted and instinctively unfastened the seat belt he had just clicked into place and reached for the door handle so he could throw himself out of the car, but they were already moving and Eric had locked the doors.
"Ben please do not shout in my car. I'm right next to you, not across a football field. And refasten your seatbelt so you're safe. To answer your question, yes we are going to my club. I'm the dungeon master, remember? Which means I'm in charge of making sure the play at my club stays safe. We're going straight up to the empty VIP room where we can talk while I keep an eye on everything."
Grabbing his seat belt, Ben grudgingly refastened it more because it was a good idea then because Eric told him to.
"How can you talk to me and keep an eye on all those people properly?"
"I have monitors that walk the floor and they can do most of the work without me." At this point, Ben tried to interrupt but Eric kept going "but if something big happens they might not be able to handle it without me. It's only three nights of my week so I don't mind."
Ben slumped back in the seat. "Then why did you even ask me out tonight if we couldn't go do something?"
"Because I was afraid you would find a better excuse to turn me down, and I didn't entirely think it through. Got a little over-excited."
"Seriously? How old are you? 10?"
"Add twenty years to that and you will have your answer. Everyone has insecurities, even dom's."
Silence filled the car after that. Ben stared out the window and watched as they passed street after street.
"Why did you have me kneel?" The boy asked suddenly, interrupting the quiet.
Eric gave a shrug. "It felt right at the time. A light punishment that fit a newbie, and the crime."
"But in front of all those people?"
"They've all seen much worse, and half of them didn't bat an eye. I've had this club for the last 6 years, and many of them have been members since I opened. They are used to me disciplining people."
"That doesn't mean I'm used to it!" Ben snapped back his voice rising in volume.
"You could have said red at any point and left the building with no repercussions."
Ben snapped his mouth shut and blushed a bright red. He had forgotten about that. It had been in the form he had signed before entering the BDSM club. His safe word was red that he could use at any point with anyone no matter what color he was wearing and he would immediately receive "aftercare" and be escorted from the premises safely.
"I forgot," Ben mumbled under his breath.
"Uhuh, that or subconsciously you didn't want to use it."
"What does that mean?" Ben demanded, feeling all of his indignant anger rush back.
"You immediately relaxed when the punishment started. I could feel it, all the tension just left your body, and if it had been longer than five minutes I have no doubt you would have been leaning into my leg."
Ben spluttered, trying to come up with a defense against what Eric had said. It terrified him to know that the dom had read him so easily.
"Ben relax," Eric soothed.
Which just ramped up Ben's anger. "you can't just tell someone to relax and expect them to do it."
"Yes, I can. Why is it so hard for you to admit that you liked it?" Eric asked as he pulled into the club's parking lot and parked.
The boy's anger fled to be replaced by overwhelming anxiety, guilt, and terror.
"Ben?"
Trying to blink the tears out of his eyes, Ben just shook his head.
"Talk to me." Eric's voice was quiet and soothing like a balm to the boy's frayed nerves.
"Why?! Why did that happen. I didn't want it. I don't even want to be here." Ben lashed out at the Dom before he popped the door to the car open and stormed away from the vehicle on trembling legs.
"Hey wait a minute. Ben. Stop." Eric's voice dropped in volume and became more authoritative.
Ben hated that his feet stopped moving and he waited for the dom to approach him, this was what terrified him so much.
When he was around Eric he wasn't in control anymore. The man refused to stay at arm's length like everyone else did. Even Harley didn't know the true Ben. No one did.
Speaking of, Eric stopped in front of Ben and placed his large warm palms, on the smaller man's shoulders.
"Look at me, Ben."
Again that commanding tone that the boy couldn't ignore no matter how much he wanted to. He met those impossibly dark brown eyes with his own electric blue ones.
"It scares you doesn't it?" Eric murmured at last.
Ben sucked in a hiccuping breath.
"The giving up of control, letting someone else take care of you. It terrifies you how good it feels."
