Hotel Room Nights

Finally, gravity has pulled me back to earth, and now I'm feeling all the feelings I should have felt last night. Shame for really having sex while someone watched and masturbated, jealousy that Mark might try to take my man, anxiety because I don't think my pockets are deep enough to maintain this lifestyle, and every other negative feeling.

Waking up felt nice though. As on schedule I woke up at six, to see Danny's beautiful face asleep in front of mine. I gave him a quick kiss and went back to sleep, only to wake up two hours later to see it still there. He's really a sleeper. Mark's hands on his chest reminded me of all that happened last night. I woke up and went to clean up in the bathroom.

I hadn't realized how long I had taken in there but when I came out Danny and Mark were up, sitting up in bed and completely naked. Mark is lying face up on his back and Danny is sitting at the edge of the bed, his nude body facing away from me.

And this is where we are now.

I'm not a prude but I suppose if one is comparing the three of us, then I'm the prude. My robe is closed, I'm not about to have a repeat of last night (I hope). I'll be strong today.

"If hotels have a water bill you're paying for all that," Danny says turning his head to me. His voice and smile weaken me that it takes a moment for his comment to register. I only shrug.

"Morning," I reply, trying to find a perfect spot in the room to go to. I'm sure I look like a fool just wandering and looking around the room, so I opt to leave. My eyes are laser focused on the door as I begin to walk in that direction. I walk the beige carpet and reach my target without protest, but as soon as I put my hand on the knob...

"Hey," Danny's voice calls out. I haven't viewed him from the front yet, and I'm not about to. I turn my head to the side just to acknowledge that I heard him.

"I'm going to go change," I say. I'm trying not to make my inner struggle obvious, but I'm pretty sure my voice came out choked and high key.

"Come give me a kiss goodbye," it says. I really don't want to, but as usual my body acts without approval from my mind. My hand lets go of the knob and I turn around. I can only use my hands to pull the robe to hug my body tighter and to tighten the belt. I'm not about to have that sort of wardrobe malfunction in my moment of weakness.

My eyes turn to Danny, and travel down his body to his cock, no pretense whatsoever. He's hard and in his seated position it points at the ceiling light above my head. I so want to help relieve him, but I tell myself it's just morning wood, it'll pass once he takes a piss. I reach him and bend over and give him only a peck on the lips. He laughs.

"Morning breath," I say. Then he laughs again. At this point I'm convinced he's laughing just to weaken me. An expectant smile is on his face. My eyes turn to Mark for only a moment to see him smiling at the scene before him. An expectant look is on his face too, but I'm sure he's expecting something different. Maybe something to jerk off to later while his girlfriend sleeps.

I bend over to kiss him again. This time he grabs my head with both hands, there's no escaping it. I allow myself to get lost in the kiss for only a moment, then I pull away. He doesn't allow me to, standing up with me and wrapping his arms around my waist. In a moment of complete strength, I pull my head away again, creating a few inches of distance between our faces.

"Okay," he says, letting me go, finally understanding my predicament. His fingers linger on my waist before dropping to his sides. He drops back to sit on the bed, smiling up at me. I'm lost for a moment but in another instance I realize why he's smiling. I'm rock hard and my obvious erection is making a tent on the robe. The shape is comical in how it's pointed right at his face. Fuck me! Not literally.

It won't happen. I already told myself that it wouln't happen, so no matter how great the urge to just make a small parting of my robe and aim for his mouth, I won't. Instead, I put my hands over my crotch and pray that there's nobody in the hallway. I haven't seen many people in the hallways anyway, but a situation like this usually just randomly attracts people.

I turn around and make my way to the door, freezing when I hear the voice again.

"Come back in forty five minutes and I'll take you guys out for breakfast," he says.

"Okay," I say rushing to open the door and getting the hell out of there. That was close

.

I rush to my room and fall against the door as soon as I'm safely inside. It's set up in pretty much the same way as Danny's room, the only major difference being the amount of fucking that goes on in each room. We usually sleep in his room so mine may be used for an afternoon romp, and that's usually it.

My mind goes crazy at the thought that I sleep with him. At some point we're either going to have to go to the next level or I might have to start the process of getting over him. Either way, being in limbo like this isn't the most comfortable position. On the other hand, Steven. I get that they just broke up and he needs time to heal, but...

I'm willing to wait, but at the same time the needy part of me is impatient, I'll just see with time. My erection is already no longer a problem at this point.

I check the time, about a minute has passed, forty four minutes left. The time passes by quickly and slowly at the same time. Deep thought about just about everything distracted me so much that I was startled awake by the beeping of my phone, indicating time to go.

I realize I haven't even gotten dressed, and I drop the robe to the ground as I walk towards the closet, finally feeling the air on my naked body.

I put on a pair of briefs and go for the usual look, the usual new look, the only look that I have actually, jeans and a tee shirt. I pick black jeans, a surprise new change. He won't know what hit him. I make a note to get new clothes while we're out. The shoes are the pair he gave to me that I promised I'd give back. The white tee highlights just how pasty staying indoors has made my skin, and I change to a darker color, blue, and step out. On the way I make another note to get a haircut, my buzz is getting too long.

"I'm done," I scream once I reach the door, not bothering to knock. The door opens a second later, and Mark answers in his underwear, the obvious bulge fighting with his face to get my attention. I push past him without a word and see Danny is again facing away from me. Even his back is fucking beautiful.

He's in boxer shorts, an extremely rare look. Forty five minutes was obviously not enough time. In front of him are two sets of clothes set up on the bed. I assume the bigger size set belongs to Mark, or is for Mark. I hadn't seen him carrying anything when we saw him last night.

"Hey," he mutters under his breath when I approach. "Hi," I reply. My mind prefers this casual tone, at least I know he won't tear my clothes off.

"Forty five minutes is up," I say. He smiles at me and says nothing else, picking up his tee and putting it on. The past one minute has been so surprisingly straightforward that I'm afraid they're playing a trick on me.

"Time to get dressed Markie," he says. Mark approaches the bed and looks at the clothes laid out for him. His physique is impressive. His muscles bulge in all the right places, giving him meaty arms and legs, and a massive chest. Somehow he doesn't look as fit as he did a week earlier. Must've been one hell of a week.

His bulge is unforgiving and still dying for attention. Danny playfully grabs it then lets go. Now they're acting normal and I'm already wishing they'd start acting weird again so we can just leave already. But of course that would be too good to be true, instead Mark grabs it and looks like he's going to free it from the tight briefs.

After a few long milliseconds of prayer, I realize I've been wasting my prayers. He pulls the waistband down and lets his cock breathe. It's wet at the head, like he's maintained that erection for a while.

"You said when he's here we'd play," Mark says shaking his cock up and down pointing it at me, "so let's play."

My heart skips at the sentiment, and I realize that I've gotten too easy to please.

"I only said that so you'd stop nagging. Come on I'm getting hungry," Danny fake whines. I'm surprisingly getting turned on by the sight, and I kick myself for being so easy to arouse.

"I'm getting hungry too," I add. Hopefully this will be enough to drop the sex thing and get to the food thing. Mark takes a few steps back and points and waves his gun at me, "I've got something you can put in your mouth right here."

Immediately I get flustered and turn my attention away. I woke up without any plans but damn it my day is not going as planned.

I'm so turned on that my priority is slowly shifting from food to sex. Danny exhales loudly. This display must be doing something to him too. He tilts his head in my direction and sighs again, his pouty lips making a slight opening that I resist entering my tongue into.

"Let's just do it and get it over with," he whispers, so quietly that he almost just mouthed the words. I sigh too, in his face. A sigh that says ugh fine. Not a second later his hand moves to my crotch, rubbing me through my jeans.

"I like these jeans," he says, grabbing the fly with two of his fingers and slowly pulling it down. I hoped he would. He takes off the shirt he just put on a few moments ago.

"Sexy," he whispers in my ear, touching my earlobes with his lips. His other hand is on my back and moves lower to caress my ass through the jeans.

Danny and Mark drop their underwear simultaneously, and once again I'm the only one dressed in a room full of naked people. I push the waistband of my underwear down and let my cock out through the open fly. That's as far as I'm going right now.

Now we're all just standing here with our dicks out, waiting for someone to make the first move. Danny grabs Mark's shoulder, pulls him and pushes him onto the bed right in front of us.

"Since this is your idea," he says teasing Mark's lips with his cock. Mark lips open up as his cock reaches them, but he's only teasing, waving it around and making Mark beg for it. His lips end up reaching for mine instead, taking me down in one go.

I almost stumble and fall at the sudden feeling on his mouth on me, but Danny's arm around me keeps me steady. He leaves me panting and trying to catch my breath when he shifts his focus to Danny, taking almost all of that large cock in one go. Now it's someone else's turn to be panting and moaning.

His hand around me tightens, but loosens up when Mark shifts focus again. This time he pulls us closer together and takes only a few moments on each cock, shifting between the two. As much as I hate to, I must admit that he is fucking great at this, I don't know if I can take this much longer. ...

This is the last time.

About fifteen minutes later we're at a coffee shop. The place has a comfortable vibe to it, wooden tables and bland colors, with only the store's logo on one of the walls. Danny leads us to the furthest corner table next to the glass window, private yet so public. We follow and take seats opposite each other while he goes to get us some food.

It's somewhat awkward between me and Mark. We've shared sex but we've haven't shared much words since his return. I can see in his handsome face that he's wanting me to make the first move, but I don't have any ice breakers.

"Hi," he says awkwardly. It's funny, two grown men fumbling at basic conversation. I hope my smile doesn't add to the awkward moment.

"Hi," I reply. Rugged as his new look is, he's still handsome as ever. The beard suits him, doesn't make him look like a salesman. We end up laughing at the awkward moment.

"So are you guys officially a couple now?"

I don't know how to play it, pretend I don't know who he's talking about, or just be honest. If I go with the former he'll just clarify and I'll have to answer the question either way, so I guess I'll be honest. I shrug, "I don't know."

He smiles at the statement, a naughty smile. I hope he hasn't come back to town just to be a menace to my relationship.

"I hope so," I finish. Telling someone is always a good thing, but I instantly regret telling someone who may try to take my place. I pull out my phone just to find something else to focus on. I open the gallery, scrolling through grids of pictures showing my old life.

There aren't many pictures of me by myself, just of all the amazing things I'd encounter on an almost-daily basis. I'm glad to be here, but boy do I miss the rough-and-tumble lifestyle that is being a farmer. I'm pretty sure I've gained about fifty pounds since I moved here just a few weeks ago.

Pictures of my old friends pop up, particularly last July fourth when we had a barbeque turned into a full out party than lasted deep into the night. I scroll past that set of photos and see some photos of my former animals, the cattle, a horse, and my favorite pet, my pet piggy Stacy.

Leaving my old life behind was hard, but only because of leaving those animals. I cried like a baby almost all night after I'd sold the last of them, but I knew I had to just to begin my steps towards happiness. My ex-wife didn't even want them, didn't want me to have a reason to come back.

I scroll past another night out with friends, and I remember that I'd drunkenly kissed a male friend of mine, Travis, on the lips on a dare that night. The kiss had lasted way longer than it was supposed to, and we'd gotten laughed at for it but we'd blamed it on the alcohol and never talked about it again. He's way younger than I am, a friend's younger brother, and I never advised him on avoiding the whole living a lie thing, but I hope he does.

More and more photos of these "friends" pop up. I try not to think about them since I left them behind, but sometimes I just miss the occasional night out. Getting drunk and telling jokes and stuffing our faces with beef.

I mark all of the photos and press delete.

Are you sure you want to delete these 973 items?

Why wouldn't I be sure about deleting these 973 items? Dumb phone. I'm about to press "yes" when a foreign finger jumps in and presses "no".

It's Danny, with coffee and double beef burgers.

"Burgers for breakfast. Yummy," Mark says rubbing his hands together before grabbing the burger and taking a huge bite. For a second my mind notices that he hadn't prayed for his food. My daddy used to say God doesn't care about the hippies and homos in the cities. I guess they don't care about him just as much. The other homo takes a seat beside me.

I'm flustered that he does and I hope the joy is not so obvious. His presence is and has always been heavy, like it can be felt if he enters a room, without him even saying a word. So for his presence to be right beside mine, I can actually forget how to breathe.

"Dig in," he says, gesturing at the food, noticing how I'd zoned out for a moment. We both take the first bite at the same time. The taste of the beef feels so good dancing on my tongue, it feels like home.

Though I've never eaten this much beef in the morning, I can't promise I won't do it again. My face may be having a look of pure ecstasy right now, but I don't mind, I'm going with the flow and enjoying the moment.

"That's the second time today I've seen that look on your face today," Danny says, his voice dripping with humor. Flustered again, I remember the sexual encounter we had in the hotel room.

"Whatever," I mutter.

I can hear Mark's giggles too, but I don't lift my head up from the food, we're not talking about this here. The heavenly meal eventually ends, and we're left having to deal with only one thing. Our eyes turn to Mark as we silently sip the styrofoam coffee. He knows it's time to talk.

"Mark, it's time to spill the beans," Danny says. I love the way he talks. Mark's sip get longer, so long that I start to think that maybe someone put glue on the cup without him noticing. He eventually detaches himself from the cup, and Sad Mark make his triumphant return. He exhales loudly, clearly thinking of what to say, or where to start.

"My ex husband died last week," he says, his eyes glassy with tears. He turns his head down, I suddenly feel so sorry for him.

"So sorry to hear that," I say putting my hand on top of his. He takes my hand and squeezes tightly. Danny is a bit slower to respond but he also takes Mark's other hand. I experienced this and learned a few tricks on how to comfort grieving people when my daddy passed. It became almost predictable at some point, especially since my heart wasn't broken that much.

I didn't hate the man, but I wasn't extremely sad that he was gone. After the initial shock of the loss was gone, the only feelings I got were from my memories of him, which weren't very pleasant. I guess since Mark had married the person he was grieving, then his type of memories are pretty different from mine.

I turn my head and look at Danny, he looks like he has a million questions swirling around in his head, so I just shake my head at him. The confused expression leaves his face and is replaced by a more attentive one. Danny the listener. I decide to listen too, waiting for Mark to get himself together and start talking.

"We got divorced two years ago, and we'd just reconnected as friends earlier this year. He was a great friend."

A tear rolls down his cheek as he finishes. He lets go of Danny's hand and rubs his cheek. Danny's look of curiosity makes briefs appearances on his face after Mark's every sentence, but he controls himself.

"Isn't it better that you were in a good place before he passed?" I ask.

Mark nods, sniffling.

"He knew that I'll always love him," he says in-between more sniffles.

"I'm sure he loved you too," I tell him, rubbing his hand.

"Car accident," he says after a moment of silence. "I couldn't bring myself to read further so that's all I know for now."

"Horrible."

We just nod and listen. I'm thinking he should've just read it all at once and gotten it over with without risking getting sad about the same thing again. I don't say anything.

"Carl Newburg," he says after another moment of silence. I guess that's the name of the ex husband.

"To Carl," I say, raising the styrofoam cup.

"To Carl," Mark says following the lead, a great lover and a great friend."

"Carl Newburg," Danny says raising his. We take our drink in honor of a guy only one of us knows and sit in silence. Mark takes his phone and get lost in it. He passes the phone to Danny several seconds later.

On it is a picture of him with an older man, smiling widely at the camera and grilling meat. I try to not let the grill distract me and try to observe anything else in the photo.

The house in the background looks suburban and is painted black and white. I get this feeling of deja vu. Everything in this photo feels like Danny and his ex Steven in the pictures he showed me last night. Jealousy mixes into the bag.

"I was gonna go to Puerto Rico to see my family but I ended up here," Mark says.

"You're good at making me forget," he adds. Danny smiles and turns his face away. Why is he blushing? I turn my attention back to the phone, to Carl. He looks like he was a warm and fuzzy guy, his smile says it all. He looks a bit on the chubby side, more like the stocky side, but his body works well with Mark's.

Their muscles compliment each other, though he didn't look like he spent nearly as much time in the gym as Mark. All in all he was an attractive guy. I guess he's in a better place now?

"Isn't just talking much better?" I ask accusingly, exchanging looks between Danny and Mark. I widen my eyes at Danny, expecting an answer from him.