"Just take a deep breath." he suggested, pausing. Then, lifting his cupped hands to his chest, "Feel the air expand your chest, hold it for a few seconds, then slowly exhale."
I was visibly nervous, my face was flush with embarrassment, but I did as he asked. Breathing in through my nose, I slowly filled my lungs and let the air escape my mouth. Again, I repeated the process, noticing some of the tension leave my body as I did.
"It's alright, just take some time to focus, then tell me what you're concerned about." the man in the chair said. He was sitting in a dark leather chair in the corner of his office, facing me with his legs crossed, pen readying to take notes. He was recommended by a friend who had some past emotional problems and I figured it couldn't hurt to see what he had to say about my situation. Psychiatrists are professionals and know what they're doing, right?
"I...I love my girlfriend. We've been together for a few years and I'll probably ask her to marry me. But..." I paused, thinking about the weight of what I was about to say. I've never told this to anyone before. Practically shaking, I continued, "I can't stop thinking about men."
"In what way?" he asked.
"Every way!" I exclaimed. "I can't stop staring at bulges walking down the street or checking out attractive dudes at the gym. I try to picture what their dicks look like through their tight pants. How big are they? Are they thick? Cut? What do they smell like? I imagine myself on my knees, staring up at them with their cocks in my mouth. It probably doesn't help that I watch a TON of gay porn. But, when I do, I have the most intense orgasms. I've even played with my ass a little just to see what it feels like...imagining one of those guys mounting me from behind. I'm worried I'll get caught one of these days and terrified of what will happen."
"Hmm. What are you worried will happen?"
"My girlfriend will leave me, and people will think I'm gay even though I'm not...I just have these fantasies." I said to the attentive man who sat silently, not responding. "I mean, I'm not homophobic, but these are such strong feelings I don't know how to process them and it's freaking me out. I can't stop thinking about it though, I've lost all focus at work. Just to get relief, I'll go jerk off in the bathroom while watching gay porn on my phone." This time, a casual nod was all I got from him as he scribbled in his notepad. I stopped for a second, collecting my thoughts. "Do you think I should suppress these urges? I don't want to risk my relationship over some fantasy."
"It's not about what I think you should do. I'm here to help you gain control of your emotions and get to the root of your problems." He explained. "What are you hoping to get out of our time together?"
"I need to know if I should stop this altogether and focus on my relationship with my girlfriend. My friend who recommended you said she's been so much better after meeting with you. She also mentioned you sometimes use hypnosis therapy to help patients with their issues." I said. "I guess I was just hoping to find some resolution and move on with my life."
"Yes, I do sometimes use hypnosis therapy when I deem it beneficial to the patient." He replied.
"Great, so would you be able to put me under to stomp out these urges? I really don't want to turn into a fag."
"Did it ever occur to you that you have these feelings and emotions because you subconsciously desire to be gay and that by resisting it, you're only making the problem worse?" he proclaimed.
"WHAT!?" I shrieked. "You've got to be kidding me. I've never been with a guy...I mean I watch gay porn once in a while and have some fantasies, but I've never acted on them."
"Why haven't you acted on them?" he asked.
"I...I don't know." I mumbled. I did know, though. I was terrified that I would actually enjoy it. Slobbering random cocks around town, getting bred in dirty bathrooms, slipping a finger through a glory hole. I've watched enough porn and shot plenty of loads to sketchy scenes which just added to my fantasies. But actually doing it? No...I couldn't. He noticed my defeated demeanor as I slumped in my chair and stared at the floor.
"I think I can help you." He said. "Hypnosis is never perfect, but I may be able to give you some time away from your fantasies. It's not permanent, but it will be a good start to our sessions together. I'll be able to tell how well you handle it this first time and we may continue with this therapy depending on how you feel afterwards. Sound good?"
"Yes! That's perfect. I could use a rest from the constant river of cocks floating through my head." I replied, excitedly.
He smiled and nodded, sat up in his chair, and grabbed a small gold locket from a nearby side table.
"Alright, sit up straight, rest your hands on your legs and breathe normally. Watch the locket and listen closely to what I tell you. Focus." The locket started swinging and his voice deepened to an almost soothing tone. "I'm going to count down from 10. When I'm done, you'll be more in tune with your true self." My eyes started to lose focus on the locket, my eyelids slowly drooping. I was nearing a trance.
"Ten. You don't have to be a slave to your urges." He paused. The locket kept swinging, my trance deepened.
"Nine. Free yourself from your constraints." He paused again. The locket seemed to disappear, all I could hear was his entrancing voice.
"Eigh......" I blacked out.
When I came to, he was still sitting in front of me, holding the locket. I felt...different. Odd. Almost as if a weight had been lifted, emotionally speaking. Did the hypnosis actually work?
"How do you feel?" he asked.
"Uh, great actually. I feel at peace for the first time in a while. I only remember you counting down to nine though...is that normal?"
"Yes, that happens all the time. You were very receptive to the treatment. I'm glad you're feeling better, but our time is just about up here. Go home, relax, and I'll see you next week."
"Ok, thanks." I nodded and collected my stuff.
I stood up and headed out of his office, giving the receptionist a quick wave goodbye. The office was luckily only a few blocks from my apartment, so I began walking that way. Living in a big city has its perks with everything being so close. My favorite pizza joint, my local gym, and one of the best parks in town were all nearby. I made it home in no time, tossed my keys on a nearby stand and laid down on the couch to reflect on what had happened at the psychiatrist's office. Before I knew it, I was out cold.
By the time I awoke, it was already dark out. I looked over to check the time. 10 o'clock. Shit, I had just napped the whole day away. What did that doctor do to me? My girlfriend wasn't home yet, so I figured since I was up, I might as well head to the gym since I hadn't gotten my workout in that day. It was about 10:30 when I got there. I usually go earlier in the afternoon and had never really been here this late. It was great though, since there was hardly anyone working out, only two girls and one guy that I could see. It's not your typical gym setup. There usually aren't any personal trainers or workers hanging around (it's by appointment only), but instead a cleaning crew comes in every night around midnight to clean up. Every member is given a key so they can get in and are responsible for cleaning up after themselves, re-racking weights, and being courteous to other members. I've heard rumors from other members that hookups happen in the sauna and showers, but I've never seen anything myself. It's become a strong part of what drives my wild fantasies. Thankfully though, I had been temporarily cured.
