Loving James

Thanks soooo much to everyone for reading and voting and commenting- it means so much that you take the time to do so! I've been completely overwhelmed by the positive responses- so here is chapter 3- hopefully I'll have chapter 4 up soon!

Chapter 3 – Losing James?

James:

When I woke up it was light- I was spooned up behind Alex, my arms around him.

My heart was racing, but I realised almost instantly that I wasn't waking up from a dream. I was actually hard again. And not only that but that my penis was in between Alex's butt cheeks. And I'd been humping against him.

I was mortified. Was this ok? Was Alex going to freak?

I gently tried to ease myself away, and was startled into immobility when Alex muttered something. His arm came back to grab my leg and he shifted himself back against me. Then he settled back to sleep with a contented mumbling.

It was so cute I just about came there and then.

I wanted him to wake up, now, but I wasn't sure if I should. He might be really bitchy about it.

I bit my lip. Being between his cheeks was so warm, so comfortable. So erotic. I thrust my hips gently and slowly forward, letting my penis slide up his crack and between his thighs, slowly pulled back. I bit my lip to stop myself from crying out inadvertently.

Alex showed no sign of waking. I carefully repeated the motion. This time it felt slicker, my precum having smeared across him with the first thrust. I nudged the head of my penis as far as I could. It reached the warm, intimate place behind his balls. A shiver of excitement ran through me.

He didn't respond apart from a sigh in his sleep. I bit my lip harder and thrust slowly again. His skin was so smooth, so hot- and I was touching him so intimately. It was unbelievable.

I kept going, until I was sweating with the effort of keeping control, unable to stifle the occasional gasp.

I had to stop. I had to.

What was I doing? I wasn't that guy...

I forced my hips to a halt and squeezed my eyes tight shut to get a grip again.

Alex's faint voice came to me. "If you fucking stop now I'll gut you." He spoke with urgency.

"You're awake?" I was dumbfounded. I thought I'd feel more afraid of the consequences if he woke up, but I guess he'd already made his feelings known and he wasn't angry (at least, not in the way I'd been afraid) so there was no need for me to panic.

"Yes, fuck- go, go- don't stop..." his hand snaked back again to grab my hip and encourage my thrusts against him and he moaned with pleasure when I moved with more certainty now. "Yes," he moaned, voice muffled again. He'd pressed his face to a pillow, gasping as he humped his hips back against me.

I bit his shoulder, so temptingly smooth and sucked the skin hard. I thrust harder, the head of my penis nudging his balls every stroke, and slid my hand over his hip. It had occurred to me that he'd jacked me, sucked me off and now I was humping his arse, and I hadn't even touched him yet.

He let out a whimper as my fingers brushed his cock. I tried to take it in my hand with some semblance of assurance. "Yes." He moaned, "Yes, yes, god, yes... fuck. Harder, James. Fuck. God. Yes." The sleepy gentle sex this had started off as disintegrated into a totally primal mating. We were both sweating and moaning and rutting against each other as furiously as we could.

"Alex," I choked out. "Alex."

"Yes," he gasped back to me. "Fuck. Yes." I suspect that may have been all he was capable of saying just then. I shuddered and came hard between his thighs, and Alex cried out and spurted into my fist around him.

I drew deep breaths, rocked to my core. The sheer intimacy, the eroticism of the whole thing had blown my mind. And we hadn't even had real sex yet.

Alex rolled over and slung one leg over my hips. I started to get excited again at the sensation of our cocks rubbing together against our cum slick skin. My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it was going to jump out of my chest.

"Well, you turned out to be quite something, didn't you." He said. I couldn't read his tone. Was he pissed? I didn't dare answer.

He reached up and kissed me.

"So much for 'too fast'." He mimicked. I grinned.

"Yeah." I agreed.

Alex sighed deeply, and closed his eyes again. He looked totally at peace, utterly content. It was not an expression I was used to seeing on his face.

"You know." He mumbled after a while. "This isn't going to be so easy when your parents get home."

"Hmm." I agreed. I'd already thought of that. We both lived at home, and while I didn't know how his mum would feel about it, mine would definitely object to us having sex or anything even close to it under their roof. (While they were away didn't count. They didn't get to know about that.)

"I don't know if you realise," he said. "But you're kinda loud."

"Whatever." I said. I didn't really believe him. Alex giggled and suddenly bit my nipple. Hard. I grabbed him as an exclamation escaped me before I could stop it, then groaned. Alex giggled again.

"See? Everyone in the house would have heard that."

"They probably wouldn't even let you stay over, anyway." I said, trying to recover some semblance of control.

"So when do they get back?"

"Mm. Tomorrow." Alex moaned.

"I hope their flights get cancelled." He mumbled petulantly.

I smiled. I did too.

Being a Sunday neither of us had plans. We dozed for a while, then I finally convinced him that we should get up, showered and get dressed, and took him to a café nearby that did awesome breakfasts. It was a good thing that they ran their breakfast menu all day, since by the time we got there it was basically lunchtime.

"Are we going to have the boyfriend talk?" Alex asked suddenly, half way through our meal. I swallowed.

"The what?"

"You know. Make it official." I blinked at him.

"I thought it was." I said slowly. We'd come pretty close to sex and we were having breakfast. We'd said we wanted to give it ago, and I thought that'd been indication enough.

Alex rolled his eyes. "Yeah, sure. Ok. Just..." he put his fork down. "If you don't make it explicit, some guys... they prefer not to realise that- that you thought this was a monogamous relationship, you know?"

"Alex! This is

me

you're talking to!" He rolled his eyes again and looked away. Shit. "Has- has someone done that to you?"

A bitter smile twisted his face for a moment. "Yeah." He agreed with a shrug. "My first." I tried to remember. I hadn't hung out with Alex at high school very often. And not before I'd come out.

"Blonde dude. Timothy something." I finally said. Alex nodded once, stayed silent. "What me to track him down and kick his butt?" I offered. He looked up with a grin.

"Yeah." He agreed. "That'd be good."

"So, the boyfriend talk." I said. He nodded once, looking slightly embarrassed now. "We're together. Neither of us is going to see anyone else. Talk over." Alex smiled.

"You're such a loser." He said.

"Me?" I shot back. "You're the one who wanted to have 'the boyfriend talk'."

"Eat your pancakes." He grumbled.

I grinned and stole a piece of his bacon.

I loved his scowl. This was normal. This was comfortable. And it made me strangely happy that we could still be this way after the things we'd done last night and this morning.

Just the memory of Alex's teeth on my skin, his hands, his hot slick mouth and I could feel myself getting hard. And we hadn't gone all the way yet. Just the idea that there was more to do, more of him to explore and I could hardly keep eating.

"You're thinking naughty thoughts." Alex said in a low voice, but he was smiling and sounded particularly self satisfied.

"Yeah." I agreed because I didn't think he'd expect me to. "And guess who I'm thinking about?"

"Tired of being a virgin?" he asked, leaning forward a little.

"You know- it's actually getting really old really fast." Alex grinned.

"Time to go home?" he asked. His voice had risen slightly.

"I'm still eating my pancakes." I said innocently.

He hastily stood up and caught his chair before it clattered backwards, then marched inside. I watched with a grin as he made a beeline for the cash register and hung over the counter until someone came to serve him.

Seconds later he was outside again.

"Up. Come on, we're going. I'll buy you breakfast another time." He said, trying to hoist me up. I was pretty sure I could resist him, but I was nearly finished and I was as eager to get home again as he was.

"Alright, alright." I got up and he grabbed my hand and started walking quickly.

"We could always run." I teased him gently. He shot me a dark look.

"I don't play sport. You think I'm going to let you run off without me?"

"I could carry you." I said with a shrug.

The look he gave me was even blacker.

I let us back into my house and we took our shoes off just inside. We hadn't actually been gone that long.

"Alex," I suddenly said. "I don't think we can do this." he gave me a mournful look. I'd expected black mutterings at the very least. "I mean- I don't have any condoms or-" Alex looked surprised, then threw back his head and laughed.

"What the hell did you think

I

was going to bring when you told me to pack? I've got everything we need." He was way too smug about this.

"Oh." The sick disappointment was fading fast from my stomach, replaced by a sudden tension. Was I really ready to do this?

Alex took my hand and led me to my bedroom.

He kissed me and I kissed him back. I liked kissing and we'd done that before. Not so hard. His tongue was slick and teasing, and his hands traced patterns on my back.

Oh yeah. This was good.

Stepping back, he pulled off his jacket and let it drop to the floor, let his hands fall to the hem of his shirt and pulled it off over his head.

"You want me?" he asked. I swallowed hard. I didn't think I could actually reply so I nodded. He smiled. "Here's what you're going to do." He said and I actually shivered. "You're going to strip for me. Then you're going to come over here and you're going to learn how to suck me." I could feel my blood rushing to my cheeks and to my dick. "Alright?" he asked silkily. I nodded once.

A slow smile spread across his face.

"So?" he asked slowly. I pulled off my jumper over my head with fingers made clumsy with need and excitement. My shirt I pulled off in the same way, then I undid my belt. Alex stood across the room in his jeans, watching me with hungry eyes.

I undid my jeans slowly, wishing I could make this into more of a display for him, but not knowing how. I pushed them off over my hips and look up at Alex again.

He licked his lips.

"Come here." he whispered. I left my briefs on, walked over to him. He looked up at me and swallowed. "You heard what I said." He was trying so hard to sound cool and strong. It didn't work for him. He was turning red and his voice shook. I could have teased him about it but I didn't want to. I kissed him instead, then slowly got to my knees in front of him. His ribs rose and fell quickly with each breath he took, faster than normal and slightly irregular.

My fingers weren't just clumsy anymore- they were practically useless. Somehow I managed to undo Alex's jeans and slide them down. He was wearing blue boxers, tented badly, a damp spot staining the fabric.

I reached up and brushed my fingers over that spot, felt the heat of him underneath.

I could do this. Suddenly I knew I could, no doubts, no hesitation. I couldn't guarantee I'd be any good at it, but I could at least do it.

I reached up and pulled his boxers slowly away as well, watched his cock spring free. I looked up at him, expecting him to make an acerbic comment, to tell me to get on with it or something.

Instead he was watching me with eyes that were wide and dark with desire. But more than that, vulnerable. Apart from the fact that I knew he wasn't as confident a person as he made out, it was really the first indication I'd had from him that the idea of sex was as unnerving to him as it was to me. Did he think I was going to push him away? Laugh at him again?

I got back to my feet rather unsteadily, pulled him close and demanded another kiss from him, sucked lightly on his tongue. "How come," I breathed into his ear. "How come I never noticed how gorgeous you are?" Alex shook his head mutely and I stopped him, kissed him again. "You're beautiful." I said firmly. He closed his eyes and let me shower his face with kisses.

His erection nudged my thigh. I sank back to the floor, reached to touch him. He was smaller than I was, his head was an angry red and he curved beautifully towards his stomach. A pearl of precum shone at his slit. My mouth watered. I was taken aback by the strength of my desire.

"James." He breathed, opening his eyes. "You- you don't have to-"

I grinned at him and arched one eyebrow. "As if you could stop me." I let myself explore him for a moment, touching and feeling his weight, the amazing texture of his velvet skin over the throbbing hardness beneath. His balls made my mouth water as well. I was in too much of a hurry to do more than palm them gently and wonder at the texture of the hair there and its shockingly vivid colour.

I scooped up the precum with my finger, put it in my mouth, let it spread across my tongue. It tasted different from my own seed (yes, I'd tasted that before) and it was all uniquely Alex.

I looked up at him. He was biting his bottom lip, his narrow chest heaving.

"You taste good." I told him, my voice lower than I'd expected. He exhaled and drew a breath back in quickly. He was begging with his eyes.

The desire to taste him again drew me to look back at his cock. I found myself leaning forward to take him into my mouth straight away.

Alex let out a groan and his hands grabbed my shoulders.

"James. James." He hissed.

I only had the head in my mouth, getting used to the sensation and testing the muscles in my jaw. I sucked more of him in and tried to suck him. I know I got him with my teeth since he hissed and jerked, but he didn't bitch about it. I don't think he actually mentioned it at all.

It felt so good to do this for him. Hearing his soft whimpers made me hard and absolutely wild to find my own release, and just as determined to ignore my own need and attend to him.

I sucked as much of him into my mouth as I could. I didn't try and force myself to take more. By the way Alex was groaning I'd say he liked what I was doing well enough anyway. And I did

not

want to be sick on his feet. I rather thought that might ruin the mood of the occasion.

I started to bob up and down his length with more confidence and speed, but he suddenly tried to push me away.

"I'm going to cum," he blurted.

That was all? I wrapped an arm around his waist and took him back into my mouth. He gave a half wail and suddenly he was cumming. There was quite an art to swallowing, I discovered, as I lost half his load down my chin.

Alex moaned above me and sank to his knees in front of me. "You look so hot covered in my cum." He husked, then suddenly looked at me with wide eyes.

"Glad you think so." I teased and he relaxed again. He touched my cheek and raised his face and began to lick and kiss his seed off my skin.

I let my hands run up and down his back. His skin was smooth and warm, his torso tapered gently in a way which led me down to his cheeks. I cupped them and he demanded a deeper kiss again. His tongue was so talented I didn't think I could stand it.

I began to explore his arse. I'd gotten off against it this morning, but I hadn't touched him like this before. Gentle touches seemed to drive him crazy. He made soft noises and spread his knees more, shifted his hips back to encourage me to touch him.

The moist heat of his crack was mesmerising, and the soft, puckered skin around his hole was incredible, fascinating. He felt so tiny. How the hell was I going to do this without hurting him? What if I didn't measure up to his last boyfriends? Come to think of it, was that what he wanted? What if he wanted things the other way? Now that idea sounded rather good too...

"Um. Alex. Which way are we-?" I asked, hoping I didn't sound as hesitant as I felt.

"You don't think I'm going to let you fuck me with that thing before I've been in

you

, do you?" Alex retorted, his huffy self. "No way. Not before I've fucked

your

arse, mister."

"Ok." I agreed. The very thought of him inside me and my stomach dropped with longing, shivers of excitement ran through me. I could do that. God, I

wanted

it. And I felt that he needed me to give myself to him totally before he could believe I was in this for good, before he could trust me enough to give himself to me.

I kissed him again and Alex pressed close to me, sliding his hands down my back to my cheeks. He began to massage them in a circle, making me gasp.

"Really?" he asked huskily, sliding a finger into my crack to circle my pucker. My legs went weak.

"Uh huh." I agreed, gripping his shoulders and trying to encourage him to rub his hips back against mine.

"You want me to fuck you?" he asked. If I'd been paying attention to anything other than his talented fingers I might have noticed how curious, how surprised he sounded.

"Yes." I said.

He moaned. "Say it." He begged. "Say it, James..."

I blinked away some of my lust induced haze and saw the brightness in his eyes. I stroked his cheek. "I want you to fuck me." I whispered. He moaned and closed his eyes briefly.

"That's the hottest thing you've ever said," he breathed, returning my kiss with renewed ardour.

"Yeah, but I don't say as much as you do, so it's not like that means much." I teased.

"You speak far too much when your lips could be otherwise engaged," he said acidly. "Why do you choose the times we're

naked

to open up and have a chat?"

"I don't know." I said slowly, as if I was seriously considering his question. "Maybe it's because-" Alex gave a moan of despair and I laughed. I was only teasing him.

"Bastard." He snarled, but it quickly turned into a gasp as I dropped my hands to his hips and pulled him closer. "Bed. Now." He commanded. Somehow we made it in a tangle of limbs, Alex lying over me, my hard on jabbing his stomach. "Somehow," he said quietly, searchingly. "I always thought you'd be a top."

"I think I am." I agreed cautiously.

"Then – I mean, we don't have to-"

I touched his cheek, slid my fingers into his hair.

"I want both." I whispered. "I want everything."

He managed a brief smile, then hesitated again. "You know." He said slowly. "I- I haven't topped before. I haven't even had a boyfriend since you came out."

"Yeah? Well, I win. I haven't done either before. And I've never had a boyfriend. We'll figure it out as we go along. Ok?"

Alex got off the bed. I just about stopped breathing. I sat up and realised what he was doing. He rummaged in his bag, and produced a box and a tube with a flourish and returned to bed. Right where I wanted him.

"Ok." He said, with more of his false brashness. "I have to prepare you." I wasn't quite sure what this entailed. "You should lie on your back. Knees up." I was glad that we were doing it this way first.

Alex reached out and ran his fingers lightly down my crack. I shuddered. He repeated the motion again and again and I thought he might be teasing me.

I drew a sharp breath as he began to circle my hole rapidly with his fingertip, felt a fluttering in my belly.

The sound of him squeezing lube onto his fingers made me shiver, but that was nothing compared to the touch of his cold slick finger against my skin.

"Alex." I tried to shift my knees further apart, felt the pressure where he was pushing his finger into me.