It's hard for anyone who hasn't been to war to understand the multitude of feelings that can arise in a soldier during the course of a military career. I've never judge another soldier's actions by the criteria of a civilian society. There are few things to prepare a man for the violence of wartime and its aftermath. At least that's how I look at my life and my behavior along the way. Maybe I'm just blaming it all on war and not accepting that there were tendencies in me that required war to bring forward.
I entered the military at an early age just after high school. By the time I had concluded my first three year tour I had acquired a wife and shortly thereafter a son.
I suppose it was my inability to handle such life changes that caused me to reenlist after completing my first term of service rather than facing the uncertainties of a life in the "normal world."
So reenlist I did and I was soon reassigned to a war zone. Afghanistan was the theater where my life began a radical turn.
As I said earlier, nothing could have prepared me for the aftermath of such violence. The first time that I saw a friend blown in half by an IED, I think my psyche became totally damaged. I began wanting to cling to my buddies, as though time might stop if we held each other closely. Of course, I didn't, that wouldn't have fit the rugged American male that we were all trying to play. But it was a show.
It was in a late night shower as I felt the warm water begin to wash away the dirt and grime of a long day's patrol that I first saw the young man step under the shower head next to mine. Not so young, actually, only a year younger than myself it turned out. However, at 23 I had already begun to acquire a hard patina to my bearing reflecting the strain of too many patrols. He, however, had only recently been assigned to our encampment and still had the shine of youth about him.
I had noticed men's bodies before, what man wouldn't in the desolation of a foreign tour? However, we tried to make do with a silent jack-off under the sheets, recalling images of our wives and girlfriends back home. And there was still the camaraderie that accompanied the occasional grab-ass between soldiers. Though the behavior was acceptable, I was aware that the feel and view of the youthful firmness of a soldier's naked buttocks began slowly replacing thoughts of my wife as I silently played with my cock beneath the covers at night.
Watching the young blonde soldier as he turned his slender body to capture the full effects of the water spraying over him, I fought to resist the lingering that my eyes sought. Instead, I thought that a conversation between men might distract me away from the tingles I had begun to feel in my cock.
"Hey, you're pretty new here at Delta 18, is this your first time in the forward lines?"
He turned and I was struck by the clarity of his blue eyes.
"Yeah," he answered. "I was down in Kabul for a while, but was just reassigned yesterday." He shrugged as he said, "And today I went on my first patrol."
"Was it peaceful?" I asked.
"Yeah," he said pausing as though he should comment any further, "Peaceful I guess," he hesitated before continuing, "but nerve-racking just the same."
"Yeah, it gets better though." I pulled on my soapy cock before continuing, "That's a lie, it never gets better I hate to tell you."
The young man looked back into my eyes before letting his glance drop to my crotch. "I was afraid of that," he muttered.
Taking my hand off my prick which had begun swelling with blood, I extended a handshake to the young man without thinking of how this looked. "I'm Dave, Sergeant Dave Michaels." I was fully aware that my cock was nearly at full staff.
"I'm Cecil, Cecil Falworth," he added, "from Iowa," his eyes lingered on my cock.
We stood facing each other and I noticed him covering his own prick with his spread hand. He was trying to hide the start of a stiffy. But then he suddenly reached over to quickly rub his fingers across my cock, "Is this okay?" he added.
Glancing around the empty shower room, I shrugged. "I don't know," I grimaced with a chuckle, "I've never been in this situation before." We stood each covering our pricks as water plunged down both of our naked bodies. "I guess we can hear somebody coming," I continued with a dumb-sounding replay. "What do we do next?" I softly mouthed the words.
My heart had begun throbbing in my chest. I wanted to leave and was too compelled to stay. Just standing naked with Cecil had opened a whole new world of experiences to me.