Need

I was in such a heady daze that night as I walked home that I didn't even register if people were looking at me funny or not. Thank god it was late and dark and I didn't have too far to walk. Thinking back on it later I definitely turned a few heads... I had pulled up my pants but when I got home I realized I had forgotten to button my shirt back up so I think people noticed that more than my cum-covered face - but there was cum on my chest too...

I'd say who cares, but I definitely do care! I'm a working professional in my late 20s (although I look younger) and am generally "respectable." I'm polite when people meet me, I love my cat, I still want to make my parents proud (my parents - why??)... and yet I let other men use me in giant windows and walk down public streets with their cum all over my face... and down my chest... and throat... and dripping out of my ass. How did I get here?

--

I was honestly just looking for a job - a regular old boring job that didn't have to be anything more than a means to pay the bills. I had been unemployed for 8 months and the Administrative Assistant position came with regular hours and benefits - jackpot! And to boot, Ralph, the boss, was just the kind of military disciplinarian that I worked best under. I had no idea just how under him I'd be.

I was grateful for the table between us in the interview, to hide the growing tent in my pants as he pummeled me with ever-more demeaning questions.

"Do you have any problem working late? Taking orders? Serving your superiors?"

This kind of work actually suits me, I thought.

"Tell me about your weaknesses... Tell me about another weakness... What's the most embarrassed you've ever been at work?" (That's when I started to feel the strain in my pants). "Tell me something I wouldn't know about you from your resume."

I'm pretty sure I actually coughed when he asked this. I might have even reached a hand under the table. "I broke up with my girlfriend a few months ago." Why am I talking about this! "Um, it just wasn't right... it was time... I was growing... or um... exploring... different things." That's it, I blew it, I thought.

Ralph had stared at me for a moment, as I hung my head. It felt like a lot of silence. I turned red but I was harder than ever. When I looked back up he was still staring. I wanted to die and cum at the same time. And then he said, "Well maybe a fresh start is just what you need. You start on Monday."

I don't remember the rest of the conversation, I was so shocked. Looking back, I'm sure Ralph knew he had gotten exactly what he wanted.

And I guess for me it had started before I met Ralph - an inner current I'd unleashed without knowing how powerful it would be.

--

Sandy and I had been what most people would call "happy" together for about 3 years. We went to movies, joined a pickleball league with all the retirees, and hung out with a small group of friends - mostly her friends, it turned out after we broke up - except for Mark and Stacey - and Chuck... I'll get back to Chuck.

Things were normal. We both had full time jobs, lived within driving distance of our families that we'd alternated holidays with, and had dwindling amounts of excruciatingly vanilla sex - the American dream.

And then somehow it all unraveled.

I think I got bored first. I'd never quite gotten beyond my porn habit and as our nights of missionary thinned out I guess I turned to the screen and my own hand more and more. I knew Sandy knew, but neither of us said anything. I had wondered if she was cheating on me but I don't think she was...

She ordered some new lingerie around our 2 year mark, and that spiced things up for a bit. It didn't dawn on me until after we broke up that she had probably wanted me to buy something like that for her. If I was more into her maybe I would have - I thought I was but looking back now I didn't even know what lust was - how all-consuming it could be.

She caught me one night jerking off to some MMF porn on the computer. She was upset and I was embarrassed. I tried to talk to her but she just turned away from me, and said she knew all guys watched porn, and it was fine and she overreacted, and that she wanted to go to sleep. I felt bad, but I also felt shut out, so I went back to the computer and busted a bigger nut than I'd blown in a while to that video.

"Is that what you want?" she asked me the next night.

"What?"

She looked at me with that expression that means Come on, you know what I'm talking about.

"Last night, the video..." she went on

I couldn't believe we were having this conversation, "What are you saying..."

"I don't know! ... I mean... maybe you're bi and..."

"What!?"

"Well, I don't know... it's fine..."

"I'm not..."

"Ok"

"Well, I..."

"Well..." she waited

"Well I don't know... it was just a video. It doesn't mean..."

"It doesn't matter what it means. Forget I said... look... we both know things have gotten kind of... flat between us."

I exhaled - one of us had finally said it.

She went on, "Maybe we should try to spice things up a bit - you know... experiment a little."

I hadn't expected this, but just the thought of it had immediately turned me on.

"I mean... yeah maybe... you'd be up for that?" I asked.

She grinned... "Stacey and Mark have this friend... Chuck..."

"I'm listening..."

"Well - don't tell anyone this...seriously, you can't tell a soul!"

"Ok I won't... so Chuck??"

"Yeah - Chuck joins in with them sometimes - it's like an open kinda thing..."

"And you think we should...ask Chuck..."

She shrugged, "Wanna see a picture?"

Looking back I think that moment was the start of the slippery slope - I could have turned back before then, but something about those blue eyes and dusty blond shaggy hair, the scruff, the surfer-bum grin, the sheer confidence... knowing that he was free enough to come and go into and out of couples' relationships... maybe into our relationship... Something captivated me.

We talked some more but it was a done deal for me after seeing his picture - it was definitely going to happen.

We met for drinks one night, and laid it all out - I spent most of the conversation blushing and standing at attention under the table, but Sandy treated it like a business deal, with just the right amount of practiced flirtation - thank god for her midwest girl-boss perfectionism. And Chuck was... so down to earth. I had pictured some cocky bro, but he was just so... normal... just himself without any put-ons. He was comfortable.

It didn't happen that night - Stacey had wanted a day or two for everyone to think about it after we all met, but the weekend rolled around and no one had changed their minds, so when Saturday night came, we invited Chuck over, made dinner, put on some music, poured some drinks, and let the night unfold.

It feels like a dream looking back on it now... dancing, feeling good...relaxed... Sandy alternating a push-pull dynamic between me and Chuck, stoking up our jealousies and playing them off each other... undressing us slowly... letting us undress her.

The bedroom was dark and we kept it that way... she was giving each of us a handjob as we switched off making out with her and giving her hickeys. I remember reaching down for her pussy and finding his hand already there, so I reached up for her breast instead.

Chuck and I ended up naked next to each other, sitting with our backs to the headboard, as Sandy blew each of us in turn. Our legs hit a few times, and I pulled away, but it was awkward keeping apart, and Chuck soon draped his leg over mine to let us spread out more.

"Your girlfriend has talent man," Chuck said, the easiest thing in the world, apparently, to be getting sucked off by another guy's girlfriend while your leg is draped over his. He pressed the top of his foot into the bottom of mine and I felt an electric jolt of excitement all the way up my leg to my groin, through my prostate, up my spine, and out the top of my head. It felt like a switch had been turned on, and I rested a hand on his leg, and massaged, working my way to his inner thigh. He let out a long moan.

We ended up in a lot of different positions that night, switching between who was fucking Sandy's pussy and who was getting blown, but aside from that early foreplay, Chuck and I kept Sandy between us. Really, I kept Sandy between us... afraid to really act on what I wanted...for most of it anyway...

Chuck led us through the motions. He had the experience and we were both happy to let him guide us through how this worked. I was having fantasies of eiffel-towering at some point while I was in Sandy's mouth and Chuck was behind her, but that felt stupid - immature. I'd had my eyes closed, but I looked up at Chuck, and catching my eye, he grabbed Sandy's waist, bit his lip, and started pumping faster. He was just loving this - loving her, but also loving that I was part of this... that he had another guy to share the experience with. He thrust a few more times and then pulled out and came all over her back. The sight brought me right to the edge.

"Not on my face," Sandy said, as she pulled back from sucking me and lowered her head.

I jerked myself a few times over her shoulder and my cum landed on top of Chuck's, spread out in a creamy rorschach across Sandy's back.

I had a sudden urge to reach down and scoop some up into my mouth, but I froze. What would Sandy think? Chuck had collapsed on the bed, eyes closed, fondling his spent dick. Breathing heavy and focusing on Chuck's sweaty naked body, I got a towel and cleaned Sandy off, collapsing next to them on the bed.

We laid there breathing for a few minutes, and then Sandy said - more as a statement of fact it seemed than like an accusation: "I didn't get off yet."

This had happened somewhat frequently over the last 3 years - she had a vibrator, and I'd often position it, mechanically bring her to orgasm after I had finished - almost like I was getting her off myself. I was about to say I'd get it when Chuck said, "I could go again in a minute."

What? I'd never heard of someone recovering so fast.

Sandy and I looked at each other...and I shrugged. I had come down but we were all still naked in bed and he had been fucking her only a minute before so it didn't seem like a big deal. So when he roused himself up on his elbows and said "You want to help me get ready for round number two," Sandy reached over and jerked him back into an erection.

Then after a minute she got up, positioned herself over him, and lowered herself onto his shockingly hard and throbbing dick, and began to ride him.

"You joining?" Chuck asked me. "I love watching tits bounce under a blowjob."

I shook my head, "Uh, nah, not ready yet... but I'll watch if that's ok."

If that's ok? If that's ok?? She's my girlfriend...

It's the only time I saw Chuck skip a beat - he didn't say anything, just looked at me a moment longer than he had so far, registering something... and then he was back in the moment. He nodded and half shrugged and leaned his head back, "Fuck you feel so good Sandy."

She rode him like that for a while, and I laid there, on my side, on top of the covers, fondling my still mostly limp dick, but getting more and more turned on internally at the sight. I think I buried myself during those long minutes - deep inside myself - I was so turned on but my body wasn't ready to respond yet, and I was ashamed that I wasn't ready to go again as fast as Chuck. And I was aroused at my own shame... the most aroused I've ever been maybe, even though it couldn't fully be expressed. It felt so familiar, so right. I burned in a humiliated ecstasy as I sunk deeper and deeper into myself, almost like I was watching myself watch them... and ridiculing myself more with each thrust of Chuck's natural manhood. I felt like I was in some kind of trance - one that never really went away.

He flipped her onto her back then and started to pump her rhythmically, steadily... in and out.

"Lick her clit man," Chuck said as he pounded her, and I noticed she was rubbing herself furiously as he slid in and out of her.

"The chicks I know all get off to that... just to help her finish." His words took a moment to register, and when they did they fell over me like a spell.

I looked at him, already starting to move... So chill, but that look was the same as the one he'd had only moments ago when I said, "I'll watch if that's ok."

He knew. Easiest thing in the world... Just lick your girlfriend's clit...less than an inch from my throbbing dick plowing her for you.

And so I did. Sandy started to moan, and I hovered there, semi-erect now, trying to bring Sandy to finish, but fixated on Chuck's bull dick just under my face - a private show almost.

Sandy was breathing hard and was so close, but she sighed... "fuck... I still can't..."

That's when Chuck said, "Let's try doggy, but keep it up with that tongue work man."

So we flipped around, me under them, on my back, stretched out to the side of the bed, finally with a rock hard erection reaching for the ceiling, as I was being cuckolded by this raging stallion letting loose on my girlfriend... licking her, but so close to him. His balls hit my cheek with each thrust in... just two guys... the most natural thing in the world.

Then I got my first taste - he thrust her forward (it had to be on purpose), and the underside of his wet dick slid across my tongue. A shudder went through me and my dick twitched. He did it again... and then again. I didn't pull away.

Then, without a word, he squirted a wad of lube in his hand... and reached it over and closed it around my cock. He started pumping. I gasped, and began licking his dick more intently with each new thrust, closing my lips around it as much as I could, and finding the spot right where he was entering her and flicking my tongue under the tip of his cock on the out-thrusts.

We kept this up for a few minutes, Sandy still not fully aware of how things had progressed.

He had gotten faster, and finally shuddered, and said "Oh damn..." and she said "Not inside me!"

He pulled out, and looking down at me, said, "You want this." There was the hint of a question in there but it was mostly a statement.

I nodded and opened wide, half knowing what I was doing and half feeling like someone else was doing it. I wanted this, but did I really want this? I was going to accept it - I could have said no. Could I have said no?

It was just a suggestion - maybe even a joke... or a dare... but it had the force of an inner truth suddenly revealed.

I didn't even shut my eyes... I knew I desperately needed this.

Chuck squirt rope after rope of hot wet cum over my face, in my hair, over my lips, on my tongue... and I lapped it up, wiped it in my scruff, inhaled - god that smell - and savored every moment of bathing in and swallowing Chuck's cum.

He had withdrawn his hand from my dick to finish himself, and I shot rockets without anyone touching me. In the height of the moment, I had wrapped my lips around Chuck's cock, and sucked out a few last drops. I vaguely heard Sandy say "Oh my god," and I looked over to see a mix of arousal and disgust... and accusation on her face. I was still cumming and this emotional cocktail sank into me in that moment. In my still-translike euphoria I think it formed an imprint - hunger and satiation and ridicule all mixed into one.

Sandy never ended up getting off.

--

She didn't look at me after that night. It hadn't been the same for her. Something about the control she thought she would have evaporated as she watched her boyfriend lap up another man's cum - actively strain his neck in fact to suck him off, wanting every last drop, a total cum pig.

It had all seemed fun in the lead-up and even through most of the night, but it turned out to be too much for her. The judgment was palpable - the scorn really. We broke up a few days later - she just said she was moving in with one of her girlfriends. We didn't have to say anything else.

I've always been bad at reaching out to people, and after a few awkward texts, most of our friend group stopped getting in touch with me. I'd see them out once in a while with Sandy, see her flirting with other guys, and it was ok... we'd always been too different... we wanted different things.

Mark and Stacey stayed in touch with me though... I guess Sandy had kept them at a distance. They were complicit in what had happened after all. They'd opened the door... planted the idea.

Nothing much happened for a while. Then I lost my job, and two months later I had to give up the apartment. Mark and Stacey let me crash on a sofa in their basement.

Chuck was in and out of the picture. Always chill - we never talked about that night, but I would end up going downstairs to bed early on the nights Chuck was around. I desperately wanted to join in with them - with Chuck really, but there was something almost hotter about being banished, jerking myself off to the sounds of their creaking bed above me, imagining the taste... and especially the smell of that room.

It was never spoken, but Chuck and I both knew he had unleashed such a power over me. Or maybe I had brought it on myself - but he was the instrument. He could've had me directly if he'd wanted but he never made a move, and I was too... paralyzed, lost in my shame and my fantasies...

I didn't realize how desperate I was - how starving - when I showed up that afternoon to interview with Ralph.