Thanks to Idkwhatimdoinghere4 for editing
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The clock ticks closer to ten, and I can't help but hear the arm click bringing every second closer. I had spent all morning shaking with the fear of seeing him, seeing Phil, who would hand me my notice, or maybe even the police, but I did not see any of them. I knew I could stroll in at ten and do my lecture; I didn't need to start at nine and sit in my office like usual. I sat at my desk inside the classroom, my eyes glued to the shining screen showing my PowerPoint. I didn't look up, I didn't want to see anyone or anything.
Students walk in, chatting amongst themselves and ignoring me like I knew they would. No young adult wants to speak to their professor unless it's to ask for a bump in grade except for Luca. Students not caring about whether I'm dead or alive really helps sometimes, it's an easy life to be invisible. The fact I haven't had an issue this morning calms my pounding heart a little, I know as I speak no one will interrupt me. Phil wouldn't cause such a scene by interrupting me, and while we were in a lecture, Luca wouldn't have the authority in the room so I could stop him from ruining my life.
"Right! Good morning, everyone," I shouted, my tone firmer than usual. Whether it's my fears seeping through, or my warning to Luca, I don't know.
I look up and see the brunette young woman who would often sit with two other friends,sitting up front, nodding to let me know she's listening. The normality of the situation makes me feel more comfortable, she doesn't know, no one knows.
"I hope everyone has kept up to date with the chapters needed to understand this lecture." I speak clearly, I know I must look nervous with shaking hands, I don't think they care.
I spring through the PowerPoint slides, I mainly look at the floor or my feet as I recite the slides I first wrote years prior. The curriculum hasn't changed in years, the information crawled out of my rattling chest with practised ease before I got to the end of our hour-and-a-half lecture. Speaking at the floor is a lot easier than speaking to someone, I could hide behind the facade of a tired professor wanting to leave the lecture more than his students. It wouldn't be the first time I appeared disinterested.
"Any questions?" I ask out of habit.
The first hand I see is the mature student, he asks about the exam timetable. A useless question that is in the pack I gave out at the start of the year, I answer more professionally but remind all the students to add the dates to their own personal calendars. There is a shuffle of papers and I thank everyone for listening and moving to my desk. I want to leave and I want them all to leave.
"Sorry, sir, I have a question!" I stop in my tracks, shocked he would speak to me. I thought I had gotten away without an interaction, but I was wrong.
I nod but don't look at him. "You said Aziel-" I cut him off before that bouncy, unaffected tone would shatter my calm.
"If no one else wishes to ask any questions, you may leave and you can ask the question directly, L-" I stop myself from saying his name, knowing the name of an undergraduate was unusual. Getting up to post grade then I would learn their names, but the group is too large now and I would rather seem unattached to all of the students.
Before I could finish my statement, laptops were slapping shut and being thrown into bags, coats were pulled from behind their seats. Rustling and murmurs fill the room, they don't want to be here and neither do I. The group escapes quickly, a few students thank me and mutter a bored goodbye, and I wave in response with a flat smile. I hope he leaves with everyone else too, but I look up and see he is still in his seat as the last few students straggle out of the door.
