North Star

Tuesday practice ended like every other Tuesday practice. Well, kind of. The practice and its ending were of little consequence except that the origin of this whole Noah thing got its start in the usual, linear thoughtlessness of surviving another week at Willard Brown Preparatory Academy.

Anyway.

Coach had just finished yelling at the offense for sucking: Ted had thrown the football too far to the right on a roll out and the receiver had to come back in to catch the ball giving Stretch, the corner back, the opportunity for his fourth interception that day. How we won any games at all was a testament to me and the rest of the defense. Coach made Ted and his band of bumbling air heads run ladders while the defense was let off conditioning. We hit the showers.

The lukewarm water felt icy on my chest, and by the time it slithered to the tile it matched the temperature of my tired body. I dunked my head into the glacial water to get acclimated but yanked it out when I heard my name. The laughter, yelling, and cursing of my teammates hit the laminate covered and well-worn tiles of the football locker room showers, reverberating into a cacophony three times louder than it would be anywhere else. Pete's voice cut through the noise and was asking, again, if he could have some of my shampoo. After getting the (slightly peeved) affirmative from me he stripped and joined the rest of us washing off our hard-earned sweat.

The shower room was shaped in a big L, as if more room was all of a sudden needed once Ted's dad gave a big donation. I had a shower head at the end of the long arm that emptied out into the locker room, Pete turned on the one next to me, and behind us was Stretch, Q, Steve, Chubbs, and the rest of the guys. Luckily, I got the best shower head for shaving. Tuesday is when we shave our pubes. It has been a Willard tradition forever and it supposedly brings luck for the game. I hate following traditions for traditions' sake but you have to do it at some point so why not do it together? Anyway.

I was in the middle of shaving my left ball when Pete's voice distracted me again.

"Man, are you ok? Don't worry about that play. Everybody knows Q was supposed to have that gap. The tight end isn't supposed to distract you like that."

"I'm fine. Jill's busting my balls again. She thinks just because she caught Jessica and me that one time she can believe whatever psycho shit she hears from her friends."

"I hear you man. But hey, at least you have a consistent lay. I'm going on two wee...fuck that hurt!"

He always cuts himself at least once. This time it was right on the top part of his right nut, right where his dick always lays. Pete and I have seen each other naked so many times I'm sure he knows my body just as well as I know his.

"RYAN ARE YOU IN THERE?"

The razor in my hand couldn't drain the blood from my balls faster than Jill's wailing. I sighed as the cacophony of voices dissipated into quiet snickers and confused whispers. She always knew how to ruin some perfectly fine bro time.

"I'll be done in 20. Take a chill pill and wait at my room." I threw a grin at Pete. I hate when she pulls this. We've been dating on and off for a year and I know all her tricks. Whenever she's about to start an argument she knows she'll lose she tries to gain the upper hand by embarrassing me. I should have known she would stomp into the locker room like a grouchy ten year old and try to run Play #34 from Jill's argument playbook with me in the buff.

"No, fuck you who is this bitch?"

"What the hell babe we're all naked right now. Get the hell out."

"Ryan, I'm not leaving until you answer me. Who is this bitch?"

"Fine. Let's play." More snickering from the peanut gallery. I was off to a rough start. "Who are you talking about?"

"This cunt...uh...Sherry. Why were you talking to her at 11 last night?"

"We're in history together and I need her notes." More laughing: they knew the real reason. I took up an air of nonchalance and apathy to get back in the guy's good graces. I turned to lather up my pecs and abs before shrugging out the usual, "Babe, it's not that big of a deal. You're friends are cr..."

"They're not crazy, Ryan. And if you think i'm going to stick around after all this you keep putting me through, you're the crazy one." Play #14: become the victim.

I still held strong with apathy. It would all blow over more easily if I gave up now but I couldn't let the guys me falter. "Whatever. I didn't do anything wrong. And this shit has to stop, Jill."

"I'll stop when you stop cheating, asshole. I hope you're not shaving that thing for me. I think we both know you're not getting any of this for a long time."

"Great. Are we through here? Coach will be back soon." I continued shampooing my hair.

"Yeah. We're through and don't fucking call me, tiny dick." She stormed off. The guys couldn't help but laugh. That last hail mary had won her the game because now I was pissed. She always knew how to come out on top. Luckily, the offense stumbled in a couple minutes later after I had finished up. I dressed quickly, not talking to anyone or even waiting for Noah before heading back to our room.

Willard Brown, or as we like to call it, Wilber, of course offered its students the best dorm rooms in the county. I was greeted with that familiar dorm smell as I shoved open the door, carelessly throwing my bag somewhere nearby. It always reminded me of Grandma Wilhelmina's room at the nursing home: everything outdated and beige. Our beds outlined the two back walls with the TV in the middle of the room across from the couch. Noah's bed was right under the only window in the room. I grabbed a cliff bar from the stash on my desk, tore it open, and took my anger out on it like a lion would a gazelle after his lion girlfriend refused let him fuck her. Kicking my shoes off at the wall, I threw myself onto the beanbag and turned on Call of Duty. Those computer generated terrorists were about to feel the wrath of a horny, pissed off linebacker on the number 2 defense in the state.

I don't know how much time passed but I did kill like a million of those guys before Noah showed up. Noah and I had lived together all of freshman and sophomore year. He had seen this happen at least five times already and knew what to do.

"You know this is why I don't like Jill. I'll call Bill, we'll go get the beer and pizza from Carliti's, and you just hang out here, man."

I grunted in response while slicing some anti-american fool's neck. Things are so simple in that game. Either it or Noah was calming me down. I couldn't tell which.

Noah left to get the supplies and I played another round of capture the flag with my incompetent virtual teammates. I was the high scorer but we still lost. Tossing the controller, I leapt into bed, punched my pillow a couple times to fluff it up, and passed out.

I awoke to a sharp sting on my butt.

"Aye, you better get that ass up. I got food for one dumped idiot."

I laughed, "Fuck off." I hopped out of bed and slapped Noah's package. He yelped in pain and punched me in the stomach.

The pizza tasted like heaven and the beer was just what I needed.

We sat playing Call of Duty and only talking about the best way to get the other team's flag while the pile of empty beer cans reached for the ceiling and I forgot all about Jill who was probably pacing nervously.

We were both a little drunk now so he brought up the elephant in the room.

"So how did it happen?"

"She lost her mind."

"No I mean, how did you get your ass to look so good in those football pants?"

I couldn't help but laugh, "By fucking Ted's mom all summer."

It was his turn to laugh. This time he went on, "But seriously man, why does Jill always have to pull that shit? 'Tiny dick?' Its such a cheap shot. Almost like slapping someone in the balls." He must have heard about it.

"It makes her feel powerful. I don't know," I paused to clear a building. "And just so you know its not small. I have, like, the Burj Khalifa in my pants."

"Mmhmm, right. I mean I've seen you in the showers; its no Noah's ark," he said picking off a guy climbing the stairs.

"Noah's ark was a boat."

"Yeah, and it saved all the animals. My dick is a miracle worker."

I looked over at Noah just at the wrong time and was downed by a headshot. He always distracted me.

"I thought you were going to say you make chicks flood the earth with it."

Red from the beer, he gave a clipped laugh before securing the enemy's flag. We finished out the round and during a break Noah grabbed another bud light while I checked my phone. I kind of thought Jill would have angrily apologized by now. Instead there was a text from Sherry.

"Come hang out and get drunk with me ;)"

I was single now, right? I could do whatever I wanted.

"Noah and I are on the way. Hold your breath."

Soon my and Noah's backpacks were full of study materials for the evening and out the door. The dorms are strategically placed opposite each other on the 400 yard long, 200 yard wide quad. If I had actually been studying that night I might have been able to use that Pythagoras guy's thing to tell you how far it was between the dorms. Some old guys probably did the calculation and thought that by placing the two dorms on opposite sides they could prevent any debauchery. It didn't really matter though; the distance was far, but not enough to deter a couple of drunk, horny guys. Upon summiting the hill in the middle, Noah stopped and looked up at the stars.

"Look at them," he muttered. I looked up an the sky, confused, as he continued in a whisper, "They're amazing." To be honest I was looking but couldn't see what he was talking about. Instead, I looked at my roommate. Lit from a weird angle he looked different, more solid. The earth hung from his feet as the light of the moon radiated from his body.

"Come on, man. The girls are waiting for the flood! They want Noah's ark!"

That clipped laugh again.

We continued until we reached the entrance to the highly esteemed and ancient Dolores Hall. The gothic, stone structure rose above us boding that we mustn't enter while I called Sherry to admit us. Old Wilber would have been disgusted. And probably jealous though, right?

The cutest little girl with a heart shaped face and auburn hair pushed open the doorr, beckoning us to enter the promised land. Sherry was enticing even after Jill made me want to swear off girls.

"Nice to see you, Ryan. And Noah, I hope you don't mind Becca is here too."

Of course we didn't care. As long as there was beer to drink. We reached the girls' dorm and crossed the threshold into the dizzying, cinnamon smelling wonderland that seemed to be every girl's dorm. I still don't know how they keep everything so delicious smelling. Becca, a portly girl that shared Sherry's room, was eager for male company and was awkwardly standing by her desk to welcome us. She blushed when Noah greeted her.

We started out with a little ring of fire that progressed to never have I ever, and then truth, dare, or drink. That last was one we made up; essentially truth or dare but if you refused to participate you had to drink instead. Two drinks for a refused truth, one for a refused dare, and one for a truth or dare poorly completed. The odds were always against you, which is what made it awesome.

Noah and I seemed to be the drunker ones since we started earlier and considering we didn't want to answer any of the annoying truth questions. Becca asked Noah who he had a crush on multiple times and he refused to answer. This resulted in him drinking quite a bit. He eventually got fed up and chose dare instead. This was most definitely his first mistake: Sherry knew how to keep things interesting

"I dare you to skinny dip in the quad pond."

Becca's eyes became baseballs fighting to escape her ocular cavity.

"Fuck"

"Oh come on, Noah. You're no fun," mewed Becca.

"Alright. I'll do it," Noah was out of beer. "I cant drink my way out of this one." He got up, stumbled to the door and proceed to walk towards the main entrance. We followed. Once he reached the front, Noah took off his shirt and this time the moonlight streaming through the glass pane hit his bare torso. His ample pecs and round nipples cast a shadow on his tight stomach. Round biceps rolled into his forearms which were snaked by a vein that twitched as he unbuttoned his pants. He turned and, with a slight rustle, the chino's fell to the floor exposing the rest of Noah's body to the night. I could only see his back since he had turned away but it was still magnificent. The light hit his round butt just right to illuminate the muscles supporting his thighs and calves. In a flash he took off toward the pond over toward the right side of the quad; it wasn't far and still was close to Dolores. His lean body fell into the dirty pond with a giggle and, just as quickly, he returned to us. His front half wasn't as clear heading toward us since the moonlight was illuminating the side away from us, but the shadows still reached around to cut lines into his stomach and thighs. He covered his manhood with his hands, as if ashamed, before his dry clothes were reluctantly returned by Becca.

"Why don't you go for a run?", Sherry tempted.

"You haven't dared me yet. Plus, I don't think it'd be anything new to you," I winked.

She only giggled. No witty response. She may be cute as a button, but she is dumb as one too. I looked back. Noah was decent from the waist down but it wasn't enough to snap Becca out of her apparent vertigo: he body swaying dangerously.

Becca grabbed Sherry to whisper something as Noah and I headed back to the room.

"Man that was awesome," I said, punching him in the shoulder. "I think Becca might die if she doesn't get some medical attention."

For the third time that awkward clipped laugh escaped. "I'm just trying to have fun living my life." Skinny dipping in the quad pond was not something the pizza fetching, star gazing Noah from earlier would have normally done. I remember thinking how crazy and unreadable this guy was.

We kept playing and I had to drink a lot since Sherry kept truth-ing me about Jill. I ran out of beer and we decided to head back to our dorm, to the vast disappointment of the girls, I'm sure.

After we said our goodbyes, we took off on the great trek across the quad. It always seemed longer heading back home than to the girls dorm.

This time, though, Noah and I were too drunk to make it and we barely made it to the hill before tossing our cookies. He got some on his pants and shoes while I almost missed my clothes entirely. I would need new shoes when I went home for fall break.

We laughed it off and finally got back to our room. We left our shoes outside, decided it would be best to take showers now, stripped down, and headed to the showers on our floor. These were private but we could still hear each other.

"Noah, bro, we should have tried for a four-way."

"Dude, Becca is a virgin, you douche."

"Damn. I always forget that."

Awkward, drunk silence.

"So who is this mysterious crush and why are you hiding her? You wouldn't answer a single question back there."

"Don't worry about it," he said somewhat more sharply than I had expected.

His defensive tone was the last thing I remembered before I slipped.

"Ryan. Ryan. Open your eyes man. Shit. Ryan!"

I opened my eyes and Noah was standing over me in his towel.

"Fuck dude, how are you feeling? I just heard you fall and then you wouldn't respond. You were out for like a whole minute. I was about to call 911."

"I'm alright," I said. "I'm fucking dizzy, but that's gotta be bud light's fault."

"Yeah. Ryan, lets go to bed. Mrs. Dorowitz will be waiting for us at 8am armed with sarcasm and black coffee."

Still woozy, I nodded, stood up, wrapped a towel around myself, and walked back to the room with Noah's help.

We crossed through the door to my bed and he lay me down gently. I groaned: my head was swimming. He flopped down on his bed carelessly and his dick flashed for a moment out from under his towel. Nothing I hadn't seen before but it was still surprising. Or maybe I was concussed.

I couldn't close my eyes because I thought I was about to get the spins again so I just looked at Noah, naked except for his towel. A six foot two inches of Noah's frame lay on its back, feet flat on the floor. His hands were tangled in still wet, blond hair; his jaw cut the light, reaching back to his ears. His eyes were closed and he was breathing heavily. I watched his chest rise an fall. The smooth skin rolled over his muscled chest to meet pink nipples that had shrunk and were sticking out hard in the cold air. His abs pulled tightly as he lay there. The six round rocks sat symmetrically on his stomach and the V at his waist converged somewhere in the hidden region beneath the wet towel. The hidden region: where his thighs met and pushed out the bulge now in full view above his body. The thick towel hid details, but there was no mystery as to what it was. I had seen him naked before many times, but I never noticed how in shape he was or what he had swinging between his legs.

After appreciating Noah for a while I stood up, pulled my towel off, balled it up, and threw it at Noah. He chuckled as he tossed it aside. And maybe it was my drunk brain, but I swear he looked right between my legs as he did so. I thought he was just appreciating me the way I had been appreciating him.

I crawled into bed and tried to drift off but my body had something else planned. I needed to pee. Badly. I rolled over in hopes that if I just got comfortable enough I could still sleep. It never works but I always try. I sat up and looked at the clock. 1:24 am was as good a time as any to go pee naked. No one is ever up at that time and I had done it before. I threw off the sheets and walked over to the door. I pulled open the door quietly and looked outside: all clear. I stepped outside into the hallway and

SLAM

I had forgotten to close the door quietly.

I reached the urinal and had just started to pee when the door opened. Hy heart pumped faster in my chest as I hoped it wasn't Daniel from across the hall. This would surprise the previously homeschooled kid and probably end up with me receiving some pamphlet in my mailbox about how God can save me from my sins.

My heart leapt with relief when Wilber's only good receiver rounded the corner.

"I was sleeping well until you slammed the door."

"Yeah, sorry. Had to pee."

Noah, crossed to the other urinal, draped his towel over the stall. We peed and I realized my heart was still beating fast. This guy was the best; he understood me and always knew what to say. We were so comfortable around each other. Maybe it was just the alcohol but I was happy; I let out a little smile. He was good looking and any girl would be lucky to date him. Most girls wanted to date Noah. He never did though. We were in our senior year at Wilbur, both 18, and I had never seen him date a girl for long. He dated Lucy Hales freshman year but that lasted a month and then just ended. I remembered he walked into the room and just said it was over. He wasn't distraught or anything; just sat down and started playing Call of Duty. It never struck me as odd until now. I was about to ask him when he flushed the urinal while coving himself with the towel and asked, "You almost done yet? I thought Dubai was in a desert."

"Right next to the ocean." I shook it to get the the rest off and flushed the toilet, now somewhat embarrassed to not have brought a towel. I cupped myself as we walked toward the door.

"Oh, so now you're embarrassed?" he noticed.

"Shut up," I replied weakly letting my hands drop to my side.

"You shouldn't be hiding that thing anyway. You should be proud. Jill was lucky and she didn't appreciate it—you," he corrected.