Now Starring

The next day I made sure to get Phil on his own, "I had a talk with David last night..." I started.

He looked at me with his mouth in a firm line, "I'm guessing you didn't just talk to him John. If I know you."

"That's neither here nor there," I continued, "he told me about your little 'offer'."

"Now you're his protector?" Phil scoffed, "let me let you in on a little secret, your precious little David is not a wilting violet, he doesn't need a big strong knight in shining armour to come to his rescue."

"None the less, I can't believe you're using me to get to him!"

Phil looked at me like I was something preserved on a slide; "maybe I should have another chat with Mr. Bright Eyes..."

"About what?" I stepped in closer, raising myself up to my full height.

"Since we're both so concerned with his little feelings now, maybe I should let him know how many of your co-stars you've bedded in the past. I've known you too long to believe you're really in love with him; you just like adding that notch on your bedpost, and this is a new twist, turning a straight man. So it's just funny that now you're acting like it's wrong for me to want some of that too."

"This is different," I insisted, "I really do love him."

"How can you be so sure he isn't just using you?' Phil quickly changed tactics, "maybe you're a notch on his bedpost? He's a star John and you; you are just a bit player, what makes you think he'll stay with you, a complete nobody? He could have anyone, of either sex, he wants by just giving them a blast of those big soulful eyes."

Just then one of the assistants came to get Phil, but before he left he got in one last jab, "John, as a friend I am warning you, David is not your soul mate. That boy is damaged goods in a pretty package. He's not as sweet and innocent as you make him out to be, and you're setting yourself up for a massive fall back to earth."

I grabbed his sleeve, "What do you mean by that?"

Phil smiled at me, "try talking to him. Really listen to him, instead of letting your cock do the thinking, and you'll see what I mean. You may want to think about throwing your life, your career down the crapper for him, because he sure as hell wouldn't do that for you."

I tried to blow off Phil's words but some of it was too close to the truth. What did I really know about David? The honest answer would be very little. So after the rehearsal ended I caught up with him, "Let's go grab some coffee."

He laughed, "Is that some sort of euphemism? If so, that's a new one on me."

"No, seriously, just coffee, or tea. At a proper coffee shop."

David looked at me a bit puzzled, "isn't that usually a first date activity? Are we going in reverse?"

"Please?"

At the shop David sat with his back to the wall of the booth watching me, quietly, as I placed our orders. After they arrived he took a sip of his tea, and then broke the silence, "What is this all about?"

"It came to me that we never really talk, and I'd like to know more about you."

"What do you want to know?" he leaned forward, resting his chin in his hands.

"Tell me about yourself."

"Give me a starting point..."

"OK, your family. Any brothers? Sisters?"

"One of each, I have a brother, Michael, he's a pastor like my dad. And a sister, Emily, she's married with two kids." Then he sat back, "why the sudden interest in my family?"

"Your dad's a pastor?"

"Yes, C of E and all that. What about you?" he countered.

"I'm an only child. What about your mom?"

"She died when I was 12, breast cancer. Is there anything else you want to know? Or is the interview done?"

"That's it for now."

After that we both fell silent, David finished his tea then moved to where he was stretched out in the booth, slightly turned away from me.

"I had a talk with Phil today," I finally offered.

He turned back to me, "how'd that go?

"Not great. Look I have something to tell you," I confessed, "I have, in the past, been known to go out with other co-stars."

"Oh horrors!" David laughed.

"The point is, I want you to know that because Phil is going to use it against me. You hold a challenge for him, and he will do whatever it takes to try to win."

David sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, "what is it recently that I seem to be seen as some prize to be won?"

"Because you are very special, you're kind, and funny," I put my hand on his, "and you are very good looking. It's an attractive combination."

"Flatterer," he glanced at his watch, "I have to go, Sonja is having a party tonight and she asked me to ask you if you wanted to come."

"I don't know..."

He came around to my side of the booth, "You don't have to come, but I'd really like you to. You just said you wanted to get to know me better, well, here's a chance."

He jotted down an address on my napkin and a time, "if you decide to come, I look forward to seeing you there."

I'll admit I wrestled with whether or not to go to the party, but the part of me that wanted to spend as much time with David as possible won out. When I arrived at Sonja's flat, the party was in full swing. Sonja looked lovely, and she graciously greeted me like a long lost friend. I didn't really know how much she knew about David and I, so I was a bit nervous to see her again.

"Hey there stud," she laughed embracing me, then she gave me the once over, "it's too bad you don't swing my way, you look very handsome."

"Thanks for inviting me," I replied.

She linked her arm in mine and motioned me to bend down a bit, she put her mouth next to my ear, "David and I have no secrets between us, I've shared my adventures with him and he does the same for me. I just want you to know, I'm happy for you." Then she let go of my arm and flitted off to greet the next person arriving at the party.

I found the bar and ordered a drink, then casually scanned the room for David. I finally spotted him standing out on the balcony, by himself, gazing up at the stars, the hand that was not holding a drink was firmly clasped to the railing. When he saw me he executed a very uncoordinated half spin, and managed to spill most of the drink on his shoes.

It wasn't until I got closer that it became apparent David was quite drunk, he was very unsteady on his feet, swaying a bit. "I hoped you would come," he slurred, "this party needs some livening up."

"Do you really think it's a good idea to be out here in your condition?" I asked, glancing through the open grating to the street below.

He put the glass down on a table and leaned over the edge of the balcony both arms over the railing, "it's not the fall that kills you," he joked, "it's that sudden stop at the end..."

"Could you step away from there, please?" I begged, my heart skipping a beat as he swayed a bit.

"Am I making you nervous?" he asked, and putting his feet up on the first rung of the railing with the upper half of his body folded over the edge.

"Yes you are, very." I stepped closer, trying to get within arm's reach in case he fell.

He flashed a half smile in my direction, then using the edge of the cement porch from the next floor up, hauled himself up on the top rail of the balcony and stood there a moment, not holding on to anything. When he started to lose his balance I leapt forward, grabbed him around the waist and set him down on the ground.

"My hero," he laughed, "you saved me from bad old gravity."

"That wasn't funny, David, you could have fallen," I was both relieved and mad as hell at him for his foolishness.

"On the plus side," he countered, "there's no way I could have survived if I had, so no long hospitalisation would be needed."

"You're scaring me."

"Yeah, I know. I sort of scared myself, too" he admitted, his face totally still. Then he picked up the mostly empty glass, drained it and opened the balcony door, "I need another drink. Can I get you anything?"

"A Valium?"

"Sorry, don't have any of those. Will you wait here for me? I'll be right back." With that he staggered into the mob in the main room and was swallowed up by the crowd.

I sat down on one of the lounge chairs trying to get my heart back to a normal rhythm when I heard the door open, I thought it was David, but when I turned to look it was Sonja standing over me instead.

"Nice night," she started.

I looked out at the stars, "Yes it is."

"I think you should know something, about this party. I am expecting." She sat on the edge of the lounge chair next to me.

"You're pregnant?" I asked.

"It's not David's and he knows it's not his," she admitted, "he offered to do the 'right thing' and marry me but I will be marrying the baby's father." She held up her right hand, and showed me a big engagement ring. "This is my engagement party."

"David didn't tell me that," I said.

"He's known for a few weeks," she rubbed her stomach thoughtfully, "the reason I wanted to have you here tonight is that I know I broke his heart. He says he's OK with it, but I know he's not. And I would like to ask you to take care of him for me, and for his sake. I know you love him and he may not know it but he needs you."

"Are you going to be OK?" I asked.

"It's not what I envisioned happening," she replied, "I really do love David, John. But the baby's father is a very rich man, who adores me and well, you have to make the best of things, don't you?"

"I guess so."

"Don't let him seal himself off and wither away to nothing. He's very hurt and angry, and because he's too much the gentleman is taking it out on himself instead of me." She stood up, "anyway, please be good to him and give him my love as well as your own."

A few minutes after she left David rejoined me on the balcony. I was standing at the rail watching the lights of the city below when he came up next to me.

"So did you and Sonja have a good chat?" he asked.

"She told me about the baby," I replied, "I'm so sorry David, no wonder you've been such a wreck lately. You should have told me."

"Thanks for the compliment," he grumbled, and took a long pull on his drink.

"Sonja still loves you," I started.

"I don't really want to talk about Sonja," he cut me off, "can we talk about you instead?"

"Me?"

"Yes, you." He smiled, "and what naughty things you want to do to me."

"Right now I want to just hold you in my arms."

"How dull is that?' He finished his drink, "I give up. I'm going home."

I watched him as said his goodbyes to everyone and started out the door of the flat, but once we were on the street I stopped him, "Come home with me, please? I don't think you should be alone."

"Why?" he whipped around, eyes blazing, "So you can prolong the agony? I don't need your pity John."

"No, that's not why," I spoke calmly, "maybe I'm lonely, too. Have you considered that?"

His shoulders slumped and he closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened them, I could see that he was just barely holding the tears at bay, "are you?" he whispered.

I nodded, not trusting my voice to not break, because until that moment I hadn't admitted it to anyone, not even myself.

When I didn't answer he walked over to me, putting his hand in mine, and brushed his other hand across my cheek, "aren't we a pair?"

Once we got back to my flat David spent a few minutes just checking the place out, bouncing from one room to another, almost manic in his movements.

Then just as quickly, he decided to land on the sofa, and sat down with a thump, "Nice place," he finally allowed, looking at me and then again around the room, "not really what I expected..."

"Oh? What did you expect?" I asked, sitting next to him.

"For starters, something more," he stopped, searching for the right word, waving his hands in the air, "More. Just more."

"You are going to have one hell of a hangover tomorrow," I said, "you may want to take some aspirin before going to bed."

"Speaking of bed," he countered, "does that invite still stand?"

"You're welcome to spend the night, if that's what you mean."

"That's a start..." he said and put his head on my chest and looked up at me.

"Can I ask you something?"

"If I say no will you anyway?" he sighed, leaning back again the sofa, and looked up at the ceiling.

"It isn't just alcohol is it?"

He said nothing, just continued to study the ceiling.

"Are you on something?" I continued.

He looked at me finally, "I'm on the sofa."

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do. If you really must know, and you seem to think you do, no I am not high on anything, or for that matter, nor was I really that drunk."

"I saw you drinking at the party."

"You saw me spill most of one drink and finish another. That's one and a half at the most," He countered.

"You were acting drunk? Why?" I was really confused by this revelation.

"I was thinking of jumping off that balcony," David admitted, "and I figured if people thought I was drunk then, well, you get the idea."

"Why continue that act until now?"

"Just got into the part?" then he stood up, this time very clearly steady on his feet, "I don't know John, maybe I was hoping you'd think I was really drunk and take advantage of me?"

Despite myself Phil's words played in my head, in that moment I wondered if David was truly "damaged goods" he definitely was a pretty package, I had to give him that. "You are scaring me again."

"I can see that, and I'm sorry. Maybe I should just leave."

"I didn't want you to be alone when I thought you were drunk, now that I know you're sober that goes double. You are seriously worrying me, David, and I don't think it's a good idea for you to go."

He perched on the sofa arm next to me, "so now what?"

I reached over, grabbed the remote and turned the telly on, "let's settle in and watch a movie and then see where that goes?"

He looked at me like I had lost my mind, but after a few moments he stretched out next to me on the sofa, his head in my lap and his long legs dangling over the other end. Without realising it I started to stroke his hair, running my fingers through the dark red strands, as if I were petting a cat.

After a while his breathing slowed, and he fell asleep. I moved to a semi-laying position, with him still fast asleep. Even when I lifted him to move him to lying on top of me, he didn't stir. I turned the telly off and pulled the afghan off the back of the sofa, covering us both and went to sleep.

I woke sometime later to the feeling of being watched. I had shifted to being on my back; David was stretched out on me, still asleep. It was then I realised the eyes watching me belonged to Vartan, my ex boyfriend.

Before I could say it he offered, "you never did take back your key."

"What are you doing here?"

"Isn't this a sweet scene? I really wish I had a camera."

"Get out!" I hissed.

"I just swung by to pick up something I left here," he said, "I didn't think you'd be home, I saw you all dressed up for a party, earlier. I didn't think you'd be like Cinderella and turn into a pumpkin."

He walked into my bedroom and came out with a leather jacket in his hands, "this is it."

"Give me the key," I demanded.

"Come and get it," he teased, holding it just out of my reach.

I gently slid David off me, and stood up, and got right in Vartan's face, "I said give me the key, now."

"Or what?" he laughed, and then he looked past me to David. "So how is he? Nice and tight? Does he give head as good as I do?"

Then he knocked one of the lamps off its table, sending it crashing to the ground. This roused David who sat up regarding us both with a somewhat puzzled look.

"Good morning Sunshine," Vartan walked over to him, "guess you caught us having a little tryst behind your back. You really want to watch Johnny boy here, he will fuck anything that moves."

I grabbed the key from Vartan and half shoving, half carrying him, got him to the doorway, "if you pull this sort of stunt again, I'll have what's left of you arrested." With that I gave him one last push into the hallway and locked the door.

"Did I just dream all that?" David asked, rubbing his eyes.

"No that was a living nightmare," I replied, "but it's over now."

David glanced at his watch, "I should probably get going anyway, we have rehearsals in the morning."

"Please stay," I pleaded, "I would like to see those freckles in dawn's light."

He laughed, "I can see why, they are so appealing..."

"They suit you," I replied, "they keep you from being too pretty."

"Are you calling me ugly?" he joked, "thanks a lot."

I sat back down next to him on the sofa and cupped his face in my hands, "you are definitely not ugly, in fact you are probably the best looking man I've ever met."

"Probably?"

"Definitely, " I leaned in and gave him a kiss, then pushed him back against the sofa and started to unbutton his shirt. I still was worried by the prominence of his ribs, but my hands found other places to touch him.

After a moment I stood up, scooping him into my arms and carried him into the bedroom, and I laid him down on the bed. He sat up, and taking my shirt in his hands ripped it open, sending buttons flying everywhere.

"I could have undone that."

"I've always wanted to do that," he laughed, "very dramatic don't you think?"

So I returned the favour sending his shirt buttons flying, and he laughed even harder. I lowered myself onto him, careful not to put my full weight on him for fear of crushing him, then silenced his laughter with my mouth and tongue.

After a while I left off his mouth and began to undress him, when he tried to help I gently took his hands in mine and put them down by his side. So he let me continue unaided.

I was just standing up to remove my clothing when David sat back up, "Do a strip tease for me," he challenged, his dark eyes sparkling in the light.

"I don't think..." I started.

"Oh come on, indulge me."

I gave it my best shot; although I felt pretty ridiculous it seemed to do something for David, as he grew hard watching me. By the time I joined him back on the bed he was ready for me, I bent to take him in my mouth but he stopped me, "no foreplay this time," he insisted huskily, "just fuck me."

I was a bit taken aback by this, I had never heard him say so much as a damn, let alone...but I took him at his word, lubed up and drove myself into him.

I could tell it still hurt him by the way he tensed up, and held his breath at my entry, but he wrapped his long legs around me, holding on. I so lost myself in the sensation of his warm tightness enveloping me, just the pull and push of the moment, the sound of my heart pounding in my ears, that when my orgasm hit me, it sort of took me by surprise. As I collapsed on David I realised that he hadn't come at all.

I pulled out and again tried to take him into my mouth but he moved out of my reach, "You didn't get off." I explained.

He said nothing instead turned on his side away from me, and closed his eyes. After a few minutes his breathing slowed and he was asleep. I felt guilty, I knew I hadn't been a very attentive, nor gentle lover, and tonight of all nights, he probably needed that.

Dumb move, John, I chastised myself.

When alarm rang David was already awake, and had showered and was dressed only in his jeans. I don't know how long he had been awake but he had made tea for us.

When I came into the kitchen he handed me a cup and then went back into the bedroom. He came out holding the remains of his shirt, "I don't think this is going to work." He held the shredded material to his chest and smiled at me.

"I have extra shirts, but you're going to swim in them." I went into my closet and grabbed out a green hoodie, and tossed it at him.

"Better swimming than flashing," he replied, slipping the hoodie on, smoothing down his hair then leaning against the counter. As his back met the Formica he winced a bit.