(c)Pelaam: October 2007.
Prologue:
The five year old boy screamed with terror as he was swept into storm-churned oceanic depths. The swiftness and severity of the squall had caught all aboard the yacht by surprise. Although he wore a life vest, water was in his eyes and mouth. He could neither see nor continue to cry for help. The salt water made him cough and choke. Then a voice was telling him to breathe deeply and hold his breath. Instinctively he obeyed. He felt himself moving swiftly, and he clung tightly to the bigger body that held him, trusting it implicitly. He was at the end of his endurance, air bubbling free when his journey ended. Then his memories began to fragment.
A face, framed with long dark hair. Rainbows. Crying not to be taken away from the dark-haired figure as other voices spoke. Being rocked gently by that same figure, the other nuzzling into his chestnut hair, soothing him. A voice promising it would never leave him. Another, older, deeper voice, telling him to sleep. Finally, being found by his sobbing parents and older brother and only being able to remember a rainbow had saved him.
****
Ewan looked up and stared appreciatively at the azure Tasman that stretched out before him. He had been doing some research at Auckland University and had decided to enjoy a few days' rest and see the North Island of New Zealand. He had gone to Rotorua and experienced the unique sulphur smell of the area. He had taken a trip on Lake Taupo, the lake equal in area to Singapore. He was now on the beach in Oakura, just outside New Plymouth. He had looked around the town and was currently enjoying being stretched out on the black sand. He intended to spend the next day going partway up Mount Taranaki, whose presence dominated the local landscape and which was still regarded as an active volcano.
He adjusted his shades. Whilst in England he would have considered anyone with glasses of such a size ridiculous. Here however, the sun was bright and hot and shade and sunscreen were essentials. He gave an envious glance at a couple walking by. Although he looked like any other attractive, single man he had seen over the last few days, he did not feel like one. The offer to come to Auckland had come at the right time for him. He had just broken up with a boyfriend.. yet again.
Ewan wondered what it was that constantly attracted him to tall, broad men with long dark hair. He had been attracted to boys from the moment puberty had struck. He had always been honest with his parents and found them to be rocks of support every time a relationship went wrong... and they did.
Always.
Despite his near-brush with death as a baby, Ewan loved the ocean. His only memory of that day was of the rainbow that rescued him. He had no fear of the sea and had successfully gained a degree in Oceanography and a Masters in Marine Biology. He had been so focused on study that he had devoted almost no time to relationships. Then as a newly graduated MSc, he had fallen and fallen hard.
Ste was perfect: tall, dark, handsome and intelligent. He had been a few inches taller than Ewan at six feet two and his glossy, jet black hair had reached his broad shoulders. They had dated a few times, during which Ewan had barely noticed the niggling headaches. However, as their relationship had become more physical, Ewan's headaches had become more intense. The one time Ste had used his mouth on Ewan, the smaller man had barely climaxed when his headache had made him so ill he had spent the next day in bed. He had been diagnosed with migraine. However, that did not explain the sensation of 'wrongness' that had accompanied his orgasm. Within a week he and Ste had gone their separate ways.
The next couple of potential partners had fared less well. Moderate kissing and light making out were fine. Anything more intimate triggered a migraine and the unwelcome feelings. Ewan could find no explanation within himself for what he perceived as some kind of fear of sexual intimacy. He knew there were no skeletons in his closets. He smiled when he remembered his mother's words when he had confided in her; "When you find Mr Right, all your headaches will vanish. Just be patient."
Sometimes Ewan dreamed of a dark figure, rainbows swirling in the background. Occasionally the figure seemed close, but he never truly 'saw' them. They would call to him, holding open their arms and Ewan would run, desperately trying to reach them, always waking before he reached their embrace. Then he would discover he had come in his sleep. Those dreams left him wanting to throw things at walls in sheer frustration.
That was when he embraced the joy of free-diving. He relished the freedom of swimming without the encumbrances of diving equipment. He was an accomplished free-diver, well able to hold his breath for considerable periods of time. Now, whenever he felt sexual tensions building up, he dived. He knew he could not always turn his back on his problem and he was glad he enjoyed his work so much. He returned his gaze to the sea. He hoped his mother was right. As much as he loved his job and the ocean, he felt a part of himself was missing. Something he could no more explain than the migraines.
His parents were currently in New Zealand for a holiday themselves. They had only just arrived and he intended to take them with him up Mount Taranaki. It would be nice for them all to be together for a while.
****
Ewan and his parents returned tired but exhilarated from their day exploring Mount Taranaki. His mother disappeared to check the phone for messages. Ewan and his father went to sit out on the bach's balcony, enjoying the view of endless ocean. Ewan looked up as his mother joined them, a piece of paper in her hand.
"You've had a call from Professor James, Ewan," she said, leaning to give him a kiss on the cheek. "It was a lovely day, thank you," she added.
Ewan flushed with pleasure and headed inside to return the call. Professor Richard James had been a guest speaker at a couple of Ewan's Master's classes; the older man holding doctorates in Oceanography and Anthropology. He wrote many short articles, as well as having a private income inherited from a wealthy family. He and Ewan had become fast friends and kept in touch despite the distances that could separate them. Richard was now in a remote part of South America close to where Ewan had his accident. He was interested in a small tribe's local legends of sea spirits. He was also doing papers on their art, folklore and the fauna of the river which was a large part of village life. The note had said to call anytime, so Ewan did.
"Ewan, thank goodness," Richard's voice was tired, excited and, although it seemed ridiculous, afraid. Ewan was puzzled and intrigued instantly.
"What is it, Richard?" he asked.
"Can you come here?" came the distant reply. "I'll pay all your travel costs and send everything you need."
"Um ... sure, but what...?"
"Not on the phone," Richard's voice was barely above a whisper. "When you're here."
****