I awoke before my alarm the next morning, the hotel room still dark from the standard-issue heavy curtains. Before I was even really fully awake, I was getting out of bed and heading to the bathroom, on autopilot. It was only when I switched the light on and took myself in in the mirror that reality came crashing in: I was still covered in the dried evidence of the night before. Suddenly all I could think about was what I'd done, how I'd allowed myself to be fucked, how incredible it had been, how I'd felt no shame at all - shame that I was filled with now. What did this mean for me, did I now prefer being with men, or just this man? How could I keep this secret from my girlfriend, would she be able to see it on my face as I could now, in the mirror? Even as I was thinking about it, about the guilt, the betrayal, the distant soreness in my ass, my cock started to rise. Almost involuntarily my hand strayed downwards, and I started stroking myself to a full erection, before realising what I was doing and quickly turning on the shower over the bath.
The frustrating balancing act between hot and cold water with the cumbersome shower dial was a welcome distraction, and within a few minutes I had the shower curtain enclosing me as I stood under the too-hot water, willing it to wash away my confusion.
Afterwards I towelled myself dry, delaying the moment when I would have to step out of the bathroom and face this man. I kept hoping I would hear him leave without having to face him, but eventually I just had to wrap the towel around me and step out to face him in the light of day.
He was naked, and lying on his side on top of the bed, facing in my direction and clearly waiting for me to make an appearance.
"You took your time", he said with a smile.
I half smiled back and made my way over to where my clothes were, keeping the towel tight around my waist.
"No use getting all shy now", he said, and gripped his now half-swollen dick. "You weren't trying to cover yourself up last night when you had this in you. In fact, you looked like you were having the time of your life."
His words stung me, but he was right - I had loved it, and that had rocked me to my core. Watching him stroke himself to hardness as he gazed at me I could feel my own cock swelling and pressing against the weight of the towel around me. I had hoped to just throw on my clothes and end this now, but I felt a new shame - a shame that I was denying what I had felt the previous night. I paused where I was, watching as he openly wanked himself in front of me. My own dick was now fully erect, but pinned down by the weight of the damp towel and desperate to be released.
"I can help you out with that" he said, eying my obvious bulge, and he eased himself off the bed and knelt in front of me. He gave a small tug at the top of my towel, and it fell to the floor around me, allowing my rock hard prick to spring free. I felt the sudden relief of my cock being unconstrained, and then gasped as his mouth closed over the head. His hand gripped the shaft and he started working it back and forth as he sucked the end. His other hand worked up between my legs and cupped my ass, pulling me into him as he sucked and sucked.
All my confusion and shame melted away - this was what I wanted, in this moment, only this. The hand cupping my ass cheeks became a finger, working its way towards my hole. I spread my legs further, and inhaled sharply as he penetrated me. My knees were trembling as he finger-fucked me, and sucked me at the same time. This was filthy, and exciting, and wrong, and everything that I needed.
With a wet smacking noise he pulled away from my cock. "Not so shy now are you?", he said.
"No", I replied. "I want this. You. I want you. Like last night. I... I can't control myself"
He just smiled, and heaved himself back onto the edge of the bed. Seeing his twitching, bobbing erection, I was overcome with lust and immediately fell to my knees to take him in my mouth. His whole body tensed with the sudden ferocity of my attention. I sucked him madly, hungrily, greedily, working his shaft with my hand as he had mine. I could hear him moaning as I ran my tongue along his length, tasting his skin, his sweat, and the small leakage of pre-cum from the tip of his firm dick.
His fingers were in my hair, and within minutes he was pushing me away and elbowing his way backwards up the bed, reaching for a condom from the pack he'd left on the bedside table. I followed him up the bed and straddled him, letting his hard shaft rest between my buttocks as I looked down at him. As he tore the foil and reached down to put the condom on, I tried to work out why I was attracted to this man, when I'd never experienced anything like this before.
He was average looking, with cropped hair, dark as my own (which I wear slightly longer), and my girlfriend has always told me I have a very attractive face. At 6'4, I was a good 6 or more inches taller, and with a more muscular physique. My cock was at least an inch longer, and thicker. Everything about him, I felt, was objectively less attractive than me. I couldn't see why he kept making me lose myself in him, why I was so desperate for his attentions - surely he should be more into me?
Then his eyes met mine and he smiled at me, and I realised that these shallow physicalities were nothing compared to the pure chemistry I felt with him. It wasn't his looks, or his body, or his cock I was helpless against - it was him, and the force of his charisma. Was I gay? Was I straight? Did that matter? All I wanted was him, whatever that meant, and I reached back to guide his cock into me as he traced his fingers up the curve of my back.
Slowly I rocked myself back and forth, easing his dick into my tender hole. It was still a shock to find myself with a cock fully buried in my ass, but I was definitely getting used to the sensation. I gripped the headboard as I rode him, his hands on my hips encouraging me onto him. Part of me was still screaming out at the back of my head that this was wrong, that I wasn't gay, that I had a girlfriend, that I shouldn't want thick, hard dick inside me. He responded to my rocking with thrusts of his own, and he lifted his head to trace his tongue around my nipples.
