I walked up the stairs, a little nervous. It's ok. I'm an adult. This is normal.
I nodded at the clerk and slowly made my way around the store. I really would have preferred to do this online but I had under a week and I couldn't guarantee shipping. I carefully made my selections and brought them up to the counter. The guy looked at me and smiled.
"Dry patch?" I rolled my eyes and shook my head.
"He's about this." I wrapped my hand around the biggest dildo I'd picked up with a sigh. "And currently I can manage..." I wriggled my index and middle finger at him. He laughed at me- sex store clerks are always so relaxed. I don't think I could shock him with anything. He looked at my choices and shrugged as he rang them up.
"Well good luck." I sighed.
"Yeah. We'll see."
I didn't really know why I wanted it so bad. Why was it Ryan I was thinking about when I wasn't thinking about anything? His stupid texts made me smile to myself on the bus. I was almost looking forward to seeing him arrive with my coffee everyday. I didn't get it.
There were so many better guys out there. Hotter- well, maybe. Smarter, definitely. Kinder. But those guys didn't disarmingly get me on my knees from time to time. Maybe it wasn't quite as satisfying telling them what to do because they always wanted to do it.
Maybe I just liked a guy who had a bit of fight in him.
Maybe I just liked a guy who drove me a little crazy.
Maybe I liked the way I drove him crazy back.
——
"What the fuck did you do to him?"
I glanced up as Caro sat down beside me.
"Huh?"
"He was coherent. He sounded like he cared. He sounded like he's actually done the work."
"Oh, Ryan."
We'd had a meeting just before lunch and for the first time in his life Ryan had volunteered to discuss the latest issues. Well. He sort of volunteered. I sort of told him he was doing it. We had a new game. It was called do whatever the fuck I say Ryan, or I withhold my ass. It was working out splendidly in my favour.
Caro looked at me and I shrugged.
"You've done something to him."
"We're fucking. That's it." I hissed.
"Whatever. I approve. Although I'll be fucking pissed off of he gets a pay rise before me." I rolled my eyes- although that was looking more and more likely. Our bosses already thought the sun shone out of his ass, his newfound competence was probably all they needed to convince themselves he deserved a raise and a promotion.
Asshole.
My asshole.
I caught his eye as he walked past my desk and he grinned at me. I grinned back as I glanced at the time. He had 15 minutes to get through his inbox. I tapped my wrist casually and he rolled his eyes with a smile. I knew he'd get there. He was a surprisingly conscientious worker with the right kind of motivation.
--
It started with pictures. I figured I could do that. The Friday after we hooked up he practically begged for them when I told him I was trying a new dildo. I almost obliged him, pulling my legs up and pushing my arse out... but before I hit send I remembered I was pissed off at him because he'd ignored an email reaming us for an overdue report and he let everyone else take the fall.
Flick an email to Erin apologising for your part in the report and then ask me.
Was that an email I'm meant to reply to?
Well it's common decency.
Oh.
I flicked through reddit waiting for him. I was logged into my porn throwaway and told gayboynate1991 that I wanted to nail him so hard when Ryan got back to me. He'd b'ccd me in to an astonishingly humble apology.
I didn't know that was a thing I was meant to do. Was that alright?
He texted.
That was perfect.
I grinned and sent him the picture. He called me like two seconds later.
"Fuck yourself while you talk to me." He demanded. I felt my dick spring to attention but I tried to ignore it.
"I'm busy."
"You answered. And besides that you're sending me pictures of you violating your ass at 6.30 on a Friday, can't be that important."
"I have emails."
"What, you gonna do them with that hanging out of your ass?"
"Maybe."
"Oh fuck that's hot. You being all professional and sorting shit out while you're sitting there half naked with a dildo up your ass." He moaned. "Don't you ever switch off Sammy?"
"Once a week with some jerk from the office." He laughed.
"That's not switching off. I bet you have a list of things you want me to do and you're gonna make me do them before you deign to fuck me."
"Pretty much." I grinned into the phone. "Stop touching yourself."
"How did you..."
"Oh please."
"Ok. Fine. But this better lead to me touching myself because I am so fucking boned up right now."
"We'll see." I bit my lip as I stated to gently rub my fingers along my own dick. "Noticed the bottles had piled up a bit when I was there on Wednesday." I said casually. Ryan groaned.
"You're killing me Sammy." I moaned.
"I know baby."
"I gotta do the recycling before I can jerk off?"
"Oh no way man. That's crazy. You just gotta do the recycling before you can jerk off in the phone to me while I fuck myself with this big fucking cock."
"Oh fuck dude. Tell me what you're wearing."
"A fucking three piece suit." I rolled my eyes. "What do you think I'm wearing?"
"Tell me." I could hear the clink of bottles and I grinned to myself. Not that I actually gave a shit about Ryan's ability to keep his flat clean. I just liked bossing him around. I wanted to see how far he'd go for me.
"Well nothing from the waist down."
"Oh fuck yeah. Do you always do your emails half naked?"
"Yeah, sometimes."
"Because you're such a damn slut you can't control yourself." I smiled.
"Sure, if that works for you."
"It works for me. Hold up. Gotta take the bin out." I heard him grunt and the jostle of glass on glass for a second before he returned. "Still there?"
"Yeah."
"Got a shirt on?"
"T shirt."
"Band?"
"Mastodon."
"Sweet." He sounded like he was smiling. "Please tell me I can touch myself?"
"Hmmm..."
