Wednesday night and I was making my way to a speed dating meeting organised by the local LGBT group in a pub in the pink triangle of Edinburgh. It was a warm evening and I had my jacket over my arm. I was dressed to impress, pair of chinos and a yellow shirt and a new pair of brown casual shoes. I topped it off with the delicate scent of a nice Gucci aftershave. I was walking quickly, not wanting to be late.
I reached the pub and walked in. First impression was the number of young people and I sighed. I was hoping to meet someone tonight and this wasn't looking good. I bought myself a beer and took a seat, casually looking around the pub. I spotted one or two who looked my age, mid fifties. Then I spotted another guy walking in the door. Now he looked nice. I would, undoubtedly, meet him later on when the speed dating started.
One of the organisers blew a whistle to get everyone's attention. Once the pub quietened down, she explained what was going to happen. She passed out numbered badges which we pinned to our chests. The plan was that all the odd numbers remained seated while the even numbers moved from chair to chair. Three minutes and she would blow her whistle to change seats.
I looked around the room, there must be around twenty people, women and men here. The three guys about my age stood looking as nervous as I did. One of them, the guy that walked in after me, was looking in my direction.
I thought I was in reasonable shape for my age, I was well dressed and groomed, maybe I was in with a chance. The whistle blew and the odd numbers took their seats. The even numbers slowly took a seat across from the odd numbers. I was sitting opposite a woman. She didn't seem a stranger to speed dating. Quickly, she told me her name, what she did for a living and, amusingly, told me she was into girls, sorry and all that. I smiled, rattling out my name and occupation and pointing out I was here for the guys. She laughed, which broke the ice. She did most of the chatting until the whistle blew. All the even numbers moved one chair clockwise.
This time I was sitting across from a young guy who was very pleasant. He spent most of the three minutes talking about himself, hoping to meet a guy his own age. He kept looking to his left where there was a guy his own age. He was obviously more interested in him, not that I was at all bothered.
Next turn and I was next to one of the guys my age. We got on okay, given we only had three minutes. I liked him but it was someone else I was interested in. On it went, from one seat to the other. Once we were half way round, it dawned on me. The guy I was interested in was an even number. How do we meet if we are on the same side?
I met some really interesting people, men and women, but none I was attracted to. Nobody yet that I wanted to go on a date with. The organiser blew her whistle and got our attention. The sides were eleven each, twenty two of us in total. I could see the logistical problem of what happens next and wondered what would they do. My group had met all the odd numbers but not any of the even numbers.
We stayed in our groups and split into different parts of the pub. Half the even numbers sat down and the rest worked along the circle, being as charming as they could before the whistle blew. I have to say, everybody was very polite and had interesting things to say.
Finally, the guy I was interested in sat down across from me. God, he had lovely brown eyes. He shook my hand, gripping it firmly, and introduced himself as Gordon. Interested in cycling, swimming, walking, reading and music. Gosh, so was I. We quickly realised we had so much in common. Just as I was getting to know Gordon, the whistle blew.
That just left a handful of people who still hadn't been introduced and they worked among themselves until everyone in the pub had been introduced to everyone else. The next stage was something which I thought was maybe not such a good idea. With everyone having met everyone else, each of us, hopefully, had met someone we were attracted to. People looked around, not fully understanding what they had to do next. The organiser repeated, 'walk up to the person you would like to date.'
I saw the first girl looking, as three other girls made a beeline for her. I walked towards Gordon as both the other guys made a move too. Gosh, this didn't seem very fair. Some people stood still while others walked from one person to another. One guy had beaten me to Gordon, he was looking at me. The other guy grabbed my hand and shook it. This was wrong, I didn't fancy him at all. Others were thinking the same thing. One or two were leaving, their confidence obviously shaken at the rejection. No, this wasn't well thought out at all. Some people were getting hurt. I told the guy with me that I was sorry but I was wanting to date someone else. He wasn't very happy.
I looked at Ian, he smiled, mouthing what looked like 'save me...' I walked up to Ian, shaking his hand while he apologised to the guy at his side. More people were walking out, I asked Gordon if he wanted to leave and we could find another quieter pub. He grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair and followed me out. There was another pub just a few doors down and we walked into that. I was surprised to see two or three people who had been at the speed dating.
