The same shit tonight as the night before. Three shots, lots of blood. Mr. Kirk's face was burned in my head. He'd talk to me occasionally. Call me a piece of shit. Tell me I should suffer for what'd I'd done, or rather hadn't done. Said his son was going to wind up the same as him if I just stood by. That much was different than normal. I suppose last week's encounter with Richey had some influence over that. Dead people should stay dead.
Even awake, thoughts from last night, before even, continued to pound through my head. I stumbled into the kitchen, searching through the cupboard my mother kept the pills. She was at work already. Gotta love tax season. I found a prescription for OxyContin I'd been given a little while back when my left had been broke in a practice last summer. I hadn't taken but two of the pills, figuring I didn't need them. Thirteen were left in the bottle. I popped one, sliding another in my pocket. A wonderful numb feeling overtook me a few minutes later. My mind started to settle down some. My cereal was bland tasting. I toyed with the circles floating in the bowl while I stared through the milk jug. A vibration went down my leg. I looked through my phone to see a text my mother sent me about the police running radar. I shut it went on my way out the door.
The engine roared to life with a quick turn of the key. For some reason, the engine idled really loud. It settled down some going down the road, there was just something about being turned on in park it didn't like. I stared at the letters for the gears in the dashboard. The P had a smudge of grease over it. I wiped it off with my thumb.
It was early. Earlier than what was needed, technically. I turned left out the driveway, just as I had for the past little while. My mind made fun of me for going the long way. I added an extra mile, give or take, to go this way. I didn't particularly care for the other way anymore.
The parking lot was mostly empty in the student section. I saw a couple of cars which I knew belonged to some of my fellow students who tutored other kids before school started. Mr. Kirk's, now Richey's, old Dodge pickup sat near the middle of the lot in front of a telephone pole. Sitting in mine, I looked over into the cab of the truck. The interior was a rust red, which the 80's were famous for. Mine was the same color. The black paint chipped here and there where it wasn't covered in mud or dust. The Kirks lived in a fair sized house down a short dirt road. Chrome glistened somewhat in the early morning sun. 'A thousand miles from nowhere' by Dwight Yoakam played through my speakers.
Gathering myself. That's all I'm doing. Normal people do this all the time. Here we go. Just eight hours to go. That's-
Three quick taps on the window startled me out of my reverie. I leapt up in the bench seat, my nuts hitting the steering wheel.
"Oh Fuck!" I cried and curled up like a salad bar shrimp, my head falling to rest on the passenger's side. The door opened behind me.
"Nice ass Doyle."
"Fuck off Kirk."
"You ok? That looked mighty painful." He rested a hand on my side to peer over at my face.
"I'm fine."
"You say that a lot." He grabbed my shoulder to pull me upright again.
"Should I take that as a compliment?" He pointed down to where my hands gently massaged the boys.
"Ha, ha, ha. Look who's mister funny man. That hurt like a mother."
"That's what you get for being easily excitable. Why do you drive with the wheel so low anyway?"
"I don't like to reach up to drive."
"You may be the laziest person I know, you know that?"
"Fuck-"
"Fuck me, I know. Come on ya big baby. It's almost eight."
I stood up out of the truck, not before turning around to grab my backpack.
"If you keep rubbing your dick, I'm gonna take it as a come on."
I hadn't realized I was still doing it. I blew him a kiss.
"Keep it up muscle boy." He laughed like he laughed with Larsen.
We parted ways at the front door, him to his world, me to mine.
Same shit, different day. It gets tiresome after a while.
"Why don't you just put yourself out of our misery fag?"
Arthur was in rare form today. That had been the most recent of several verbal jabs shouted towards the back of Richey's head. Even worse, Arthur was sitting right next to me. Richey was at the next table over. He should've stayed in the library. The jock table sits the furthest from the faculty table, a fact which was causing much lament in my stomach this very moment.
"Are you deaf and gay? That must be a real bitch."
Of course, everyone at the table laughed it up, chuckle fucks that they were. I stared at my food. Arthur's hand grabbed at an apple on Shirley Thompson's tray.
"I'm talking to you fairy!" Richey finally turned around.
When Arthur's hand pulled back to throw, I reached up and grabbed it before it left his grasp. It looked like the world's dumbest high five. Arthur, along with everyone else who'd seen it, had a look on their face like they'd just seen the pope shit.
"Cut that shit out." I said. "Some of us would like to eat without going death in one ear, specifically the one facing you." Once more I stood up and waltzed out the cafeteria. Every eye which had seen the altercation was burning the back of my head.
I headed for the same bathroom I'd been in after my meltdown. It was the closest to Mr. Sumner's. I could just chill till the bell then take a short little walk down the hall. I dug in my pocket for an OxyContin. I was nearly out. My efforts to make my supply last could be set aside for the moment. Arthur's being his normal, dickhead self had sent my mind running. I put the pill on my tongue. My hands filled with water to chase it down. Much better.
"What the fuck did you just take?" Came an angry voice from behind.
I looked up in the mirror to see Richey staring back at me. When I spun around to see him eye to eye, he looked even more pissed.
"What are you doing here?"
"I followed you after your little scene, now what did you take?"
"Scene? I don't make scenes. You should be happy! I stopped you from getting hit in the face."
"You're avoiding the question." He stalked over to stand toe to toe with me in three long strides. Damn tall people.
"I just had a headache."
"Bullshit!" He said.
"How dare you-"
"Ethan, your eyes are dilated. Since you just took whatever that was, I know for a fact something else was already in your system, now what was it." I started to say something, anything. "Don't you even think about lying to me." He stared right into my eyes, his bright blues shining in fury.
"It was just OxyContin."
His eyes bulged, eyebrows shooting up.
