Sun and Sea: Mending what is mine but broken!
Narrator: Kitoo
Rohit Uncle was smiling as if he was there on that spot again, reliving that night but not the bad parts, the good ones. We left the coffee shop and took a cab to Marine Lines, sat there watching the sea and the sun, together but still apart.
"My first date with Anu was unreal, he was so good looking but always nervous. I didn't tell him but it was my 19th birthday. I knew he would run away if I told him that it was a special day for me. But that idiot didn't know, him being there with me made the day special and not my birthday." He smiled looking at each of us and continued his love story.
Narrator: Rohit
We spoke for hours every day the following week, sitting in the deserted driveway to the street leading to our houses, bundled up in the cold, just our shoulders and knees touching. I still can't figure out why I wasn't washed away with his sorrow and the sadness of his past. Whatever he was, however broken, tormented, angry or unable to love, I wanted him, the full package. I didn't want to fix him or help him or anything, I just wanted him in my life as he was. I realised if he goes bald and cuts off his lashes, I will still want him, disappointed but undeterred. Nothing about him was off putting for me, I was happy with him being around me, that's it, no expectation.
I wanted to make him like his life one moment at a time, not plan a future with me in it or anything, just be there in the now with me, try and be happy.
He talked himself into a bad mood on Friday night, going on and on about how I should stay away from him, actually going in circles and making absolutely no sense. Finally I got up and stood before him and grabbed his shoulders, "Look Anu! I am here and not going anywhere and I will be waiting for you tomorrow. Please bring on all your baggage Anu, I have been powerlifting all my life."
So all his efforts to push me away through the week when he had talked himself out of his happy mood was just a waste of time and he was soon going to find out how cemented we had become with just words and a handshake.
He didn't want me to come and pick him up. He walked through a really cold foggy morning to my place but didn't come in, just stood nervously next to the car not looking anywhere in particular, lost in his thoughts. I saw him from my window looking unbelievable in his blue jeans and sneakers, his blue and black check shirt showing under the black jacket collar, his hair combed back from his face. He just stood there in the cold with his hands in his jacket pockets waiting, not even expecting me to come out as he didn't tell me he had reached my place almost an hour early, he was ready to wait for as long as it takes.
"So much for someone who wanted to keep me away." I smiled and cheered loudly, punching the air as I jumped. Pa looked up from his breakfast "He is here?" "Yes, Pa and an hour early. What do you make of that?"
"After what you told me about his life in the past years, I am happy he trusts you, but don't be too hard on his parents either, everyone is not as lucky as you." he said, cutting his toast into bite size pieces in his weird breakfast ritual.
"Yes, I know Pa and I have inherited your modest genes." He threw a piece of toast at me and I ducked. "Hey, no hitting me with food on my birthday and before my first date."
I went to him, hugged him from behind with him sitting at the dinner table, gave him a quick peck on his cheek and left carrying extra gloves and a skull cap for the idiot waiting for me outside.
As soon as I shut the door behind me, Anu looked up confused, his large green eyes wide like he wasn't expecting me to come at all, much less an hour early like him.
I walked up to him and hugged him, bending a bit to touch my head to his shoulders.
I straightened up and held him at my arm's length looking at him. "I am glad you like boys, otherwise I would have made friends with Bhumi to stay around you." I said shamelessly.
He looked at me with those big green eyes, tried saying something and then closed his mouth and then cleared his throat and said "You have no filter, like you say what you want, whatever comes to your mind."
"You sound impressed, which is a good start to our date."
"Who said it's a date! It's a scout out for a possible suicide spot."
"Joke as much as you want doll lips, you like me and have come an hour early for this and dressed up nice for me." I pointed at myself with 2 thumbs and leaned in and gave him a kiss on his cheek.
"Dude! What's wrong with you?" He looked from one side to another, "Someone will see you with me, you really need to take care of your reputation and what about your dad?" he pointed towards my house.
"So you liked it, just worried about people, don't worry about them, it's a loss making scheme, worry about me and you will get a lot in return, this man here is pure gold."
"Are you going to be like this all day?"
"Yes sweetie! I promise." he didn't respond but got in the car, the ghost of a smile crossing his lips.
We drove towards the hill side of Naina Peak, parked and hiked for some time to the café run by my childhood nanny, Fatima Khazi, whom I called Mumaani, which means maternal uncle's wife in Urdu.
She took care of me while Ma got cancer when I was 6 years old and after she died fighting the sickness for almost 4 years. Every day I would sit next to Ma and she would tell me stories from our ancient texts and made me promise to stay happy and try to make everyone around me cheerful and that's how she would want to see me. After she passed away Mumaani continued our tradition, never letting me drown in that grief, helping me build my own support system with laughter and love.
