Chip:...and you can plainly see it's not pass interference.
Rick: That's right. Looking at it in slow motion, you see the receiver hold his hands up waiting for the ball. The safety comes in from the side and sticks his arm in between the receiver's hands to knock it away. The safety never even makes contact with the receiver. But the receiver sure does do a good job of playing it up. He jerks his arm down to make it look like the safety interfered with the play. The official who threw the flag was behind the play and had his vision impeded by the bodies of both men. He didn't see a thing and only reacted to the receiver's acting job.
Chip: So then the entire officiating crew comes together to talk it through. And in a new rule adopted by the league just this season, they do a cursory replay review of the play. The ref actually goes over to the sideline, takes a quick look at the play in regular speed and in slow motion and STILL upholds the call.
Rick: It's a travesty. If any fan out there wants to know why the Houston Texans' undefeated season just went down in flames on the final game of the regular season, all you have to do is look at the result of that play. If the penalty is overturned, there are only 3 seconds left in the game and the Cardinals are on their own 30 yard line. Maybe a miracle happens and they score on the final play of the game. Maybe they don't. We'll never know. What we DO know is that penalty that wasn't a penalty allowed Arizona into field goal range and on the next play, the kicker knocked it through the uprights to give the Cardinals a 27 to 24 victory.
Chip: And that gives the Houston Texans a record of 16 and 1 for a season where they've looked practically unstoppable all year long. No one has even come close to beating them. Rick, I've got to ask you... The ref, Mack Carmichael... He's got a pretty good reputation around the league. He takes a look at this play at least a couple times on the tablet - maybe more than a couple. How do you justify him not overturning the penalty flag?
Rick (hesitating): I think all I should say here is that the wrong call was made and hopefully some things will be done by the league office in the offseason to avoid something like this happening again.
Chip: We've worked together for how many seasons now...six? Seven?
Rick: Yeah. About.
Chip: And we've known each other for maybe ten years before that from your playing days before you transitioned to the TV booth and then became a studio analyst, right?
Rick: Sure. (chuckles uncomfortably) Where are you going with this, Chip?
Chip: In all my years knowing you, I've never known you to hold back an opinion on anything...football-related or otherwise. I know you've got something more to say than just "the wrong call was made." C'mon, partner. Tell me how you really feel.
Rick: I really shouldn't. It's bad form.
Chip: Bad form nothing! It's what we both earn big bucks to do...talking about and analyze plays. Don't worry, Rick. It's just you and I here shooting the breeze...with a few million of our loyal viewers watching. What was your gut reaction when you saw that penalty and the aftermath go down?
Rick (hesitates a moment before speaking forcefully): Okay. I'll say it. Mack Carmichael is completely overrated. The guy doesn't just need contact lenses. He needs Mister Magoo glasses with Coke bottle thick lenses...and even then it still wouldn't be enough to help him make the right call on anything. The guy is a total amateur, frankly. These refs get post-season assignments on the merit of their record calling games during the regular season. Just based off of this one play alone, I think he should never be allowed to call a post-season game ever again for the rest of his life!
Chip: Wow, Rick. Tell me how you REALLY feel!
Rick (sighs as if with relief, but has a very uncomfortable look on his face): It's what I'm paid to do, buddy!
Sitting alone in his hotel room in L.A., watching the Week 18 wrap-up show special, Mack Carmichael felt his face flush and his blood boil with anger. As the voices of the two talking heads continued banter faded into background noise, he ruminated on what he'd seen on TV the past few minutes. No one likes to have someone else second guess their abilities. Mack prided himself on his ability to call a game and he always strove to make the right calls. He didn't get it right 100% of the time - no one does - but he always had the best of intentions. And that play they were talking about? Maybe the two TV "know-it-alls" didn't see what he saw on the replays on the field yesterday, but Mack knew he'd made the call he thought was correct. To be called out so publicly and in such a way that seemed geared to make a fool out of him? It was infuriating. In fact it wasn't just infuriating. It cut deep. He was starting to think that maybe he'd made a mistake.
Things had been a little topsy-turvy for the ref during the season. He'd had that early-season rendezvous with Gerry Phillips, the hungry bottom front office exec who still to this day reaches out with an occasional text every couple weeks, trying his best to get more ref dick in his ass.
A couple weeks after that initial hookup, Mack had a romp with the cute Head Coach of that team from the Midwest the night before the game. Somehow, the older ref - who had an open marriage arrangement with his wife, Teresa - had let the coach get into his head and his heart. In a weak moment the next day at the stadium a few hours before the game - in an effort to purge those feelings about the coach - he let himself get seduced when a D lineman on Coach's team sought him out and started chatting him up. Mack and the 26-year old - who had muscles in all the right places and what would be an understatement to describe as a sweet ass - went to the home team locker room that both men were sure would be totally deserted for at least another hour until the rest of the team and the coaching staff started showing up. They were naked and sweaty in the Athletic Training Room...Mack had the hunky lineman on his back with his legs in the air on the training table, pounding him for all he was worth in an effort to get the previous night with Coach out of his head.
Mack felt himself ready to explode when out of the blue from behind him at full volume he heard, "What the fuck is THIS?!"
Talk about a ball-shriveling sound... Mack saw the kid's eyes go wide as he glanced at the doorway. Mack pulled out right away and tried to compose himself before he turned around. Before the kid even spoke to the third party who'd come onto the scene, Mack knew who it was that had walked in on them. It was a voice he'd gotten to know well just 12 hours earlier.
