The Bachelor Weeend Deal

As soon as I knew I was alone, I unzipped my backpack and pulled out my cargo shorts. With the speedo covered, I swung the sack back over one bare shoulder, kicked sand over my drying cum, and headed back to the house.

It definitely felt like a shorter route on the way back and I was opening the front door in no time. Unfortunately, I was still not back in time to catch up with the others, and I got a series of texts from Josh as soon as I crossed the threshold.

"We're headed over."

"Get dressed and come to 36 Wisteria Path"

"You can walk it's just down the street"

My phone pinged in my hand and a final message popped up.

"It's a tea party so think gay garden party"

Ping.

"You know for how to dress"

What the fuck is a 'gay garden party'?

I thought. How was that supposed to help me choose my clothes?

I left him on read, a little miffed they didn't wait for me at the house but still determined to catch up. I went to my room and opened up my suitcase and felt a sudden distaste for everything I had in there.

Some band tees, more cargo shorts, and even a Giants jersey.

Wow, I really had no idea what I was getting into this weekend, did I?

I looked past my "tragically straight" clothes and found a short sleeve button down and khakis that I'd packed for fancier settings. If this didn't say "gay garden party," then I was shit out of luck. Mercifully, the pattern on the emerald green shirt was little palm trees.

I changed and paused to look in the mirror.

Has this shirt always been this boxy?

I thought, staring at my reflection.

I'd already worn this outfit several times before without a second thought, but now - here - they just seemed ill-fitting. I tugged at the collar I'd buttoned all the way up and frowned at the way the khakis just looked saggy.

Who am I kidding? I know the reason.

I thought, rolling my eyes.

Josh is for sure gonna have something to say about it.

The walk over to Wisteria Path was pleasant enough, but as I approached the house I could hear the beats of disco starting to invade the birdsong and distant crashing sound of the waves.

"It's rainin' men! Hallelujah, it's rainin' men!" The Weather Girls blasted through the door as it opened, and the man who let me in greeted me like we knew each other. He immediately gave me a kiss on each cheek and a full body-contact hug.

"Hi there," he said dreamily. "Welcome to m' party. Ssssso nice t' see ya again. Come on in!"

"I'm sorry, I...," I began as he led me over the threshold and across a very large foyer. I took an extended look around at the high ceilings and marble tiling. "S- sorry, I, uh, I don't think we've actually met before."

"Oh thassokay. 'T's not really my house." he slurred before turning a corner into a large living room and immediately wandering off into the crowd of guys that were milling and dancing about. I paused for a moment, wondering if I should go help him out. He seemed too drunk already and it was barely 3pm.

"Danny!" A voice called from across the room. "You made it!"

It was Benji, standing in the little kitchenette in the corner by the sliding back doors. He had a drink in each hand. I waved and made my way over.

"Hey man! I can't believe you're still drinking!" I said.

"And you better catch up, gurl!" He said before giving me a visible once over. "Oh... oh my."

"What?" I looked down, half expecting to see some food on my shirt or something.

"No no no, this won't do." He was laying the drama on thick. "Follow me, we need the girls for this." And he led the way to the back patio, tisking along as he went.

"Dan- I mean, Danny!" Yelled Josh when he saw me right before downing the shot in his hand with the rest of the group. "We've got shots for y... what the fuck are you WEARING?"

"Ok right?!" Benji said as he put his drinks down only to take the offered shot. It went right down the hatch.

I rolled my eyes in exasperation. "Well, these are the nicest clothes I brought with me. If you hate them so much, help me!"

"Oh baby, we thought you'd never ask," Amir swooped over. "And in all honesty, we might just be able to alter what you've got here."

Set myself up for that one.

I thought sardonically, but I resigned myself over to his fussing.

"Now, first things first we need to undo these," he reached up and unbuttoned my top three buttons. "And we gotta roll these sleeves up a few times to show off those arms." He gave my bicep a soft, teasing pinch.

"Now the thing with the pants," Amir stepped back to observe, "is that they're entirely too big. Like

too

big. You need a tailor or a Marshall's, gurl."

"Or a costume designer." Allan raised his hand high and took the last gurgling sips through the straw of his cocktail. "Come on, let's go see if we can find a sewing kit."

He grabbed my forearm and led me away back toward the house. A few steps later he looked back at me and very suddenly dropped my arm.

"Uh sorry about that," he mumbled and turned back to keep walking through the crowd, muttering about being drunk.

It took us a few tries at the random doors in the depths of the house, but toward the back we found a laundry room that had what Allan was looking for.

"Bingo!" He said. "You can always trust the gays to have safety pins lying around somewhere."

"Oh nice!" I said. "So, like... what are you going to do with those?"

"Unzip your pants."

"What?"

"S- sorry!" Allan seemed to realize the forward nature of his request. "I don't mean like- like that! I'm just gunna do a quick, dirty backstage alteration."

"Oh," I said and tentatively unbuttoned and unzipped my khakis.

"Oh wait," he held out a hand to stop me. "I forgot, I should see how they sit on you first. May I?"

I let go of the front flaps that now hung open and held my arms aloft as he reached for my waist band.

"Ok so the thing you should always remember about pants like this is they sit higher than your hips. They're supposed to go to your waist."

"Aren't those the same thing?"

Allan stifled a giggle.

"No, silly! These are your hips," he tapped his fingers at where the waistband was sitting before grabbing it and hoisting it higher, "This is your waist."

"Ey! Yo!" I yelped as I felt the inseam become acquainted with my taint. Allan laughed out loud this time.

"Ok well maybe not that high, but the gist is your waist sits above your hips. Now in your case that means your pants are only a little too big, because you've got a little belly."

He patted my slight pudge, just below the belly button... just above my...

"S- so it only needs to come in like an inch or two," he continued.

Then he got down on his knees in front of me and I felt his hands fumbling with the waistband. His fingers pinched and folded the cloth and I could feel him working against my body, the backs of his knuckles tickling the fabric of my underwear. I took a deep, steadying breath and exhaled a little shakily.

Allan looked up when I made the sound.

"Sorry to be so close," he said softly, before reaching for the other side and repeating his work.

"N- no worries," I replied quickly, unsteadily.

"Ok I think that should be measured right," Allan patted my thighs lightly before reaching up to button my pants back together. I'm not sure why I let him zip me up too. But he did - grabbing the crotch of my khakis and dragging the zipper northward. The vibration of the zipping action on my junk buzzed and it was like a radiator switched on in my belly. I could feel the blood start pumping into my dick, unbidden.

I breathed deeply again as Allan got up and stepped back to check the fit.

"I think that'll do," he said. "I gave you a pair of pleats in the front. It's a little more 'in,' more 'now,' you know?"

"Actually, I don't know." I laughed, and he laughed too. "Thanks for the help."

"Anytime."

There was an awkward pause where we both just stared at each other for a moment. I noticed his brown eyes were so big, I could almost see all the way around the irises. His face was lightly freckled.

Allan took a breath and turned toward the mirror in the corner.

"A- and anyway, check it out," he pointed. "See what wearing the pants higher can do for that ass?"

I moved into view of the mirror and looked at my reflection. It was actually kind of impressive. The open styling on the shirt revealed my bit of chest hair and it truly sat on my shoulders differently - cooler. I turned sideways to inspect my rear in the newly-pinned pants and Allan wasn't kidding, the whole outfit seemed to accentuate my plumpest assets in a way I'd never achieved before. Even as I held the hem of my shirt to get a look, I was partially distracted by the arms my rolled up sleeves revealed.

Huh,

I thought.

Allan appeared behind me in the reflection.

"I think our work here is done." He held up an A-OK sign. "If you wanna be a little bolder you can undo another button, but that's up to you."

I felt him guide me, tentatively, to face him and then reach up to pop open a fourth of my shirt buttons. He shook the cloth and it fell more open, revealing all the way down to the top of my belly. The tickle of his delicate hands moving my shirt felt hot on my skin.

"You think I can pull it off?"

"Definitely." He smiled up at me. He was so close. "Well, I s- suppose we should get back to the others."

"Right." I said softly, coming out of this unexpected reverie. "Yeah, let's go find them."

And with that we both left the room, quickly dropping the tension of the moment like a hot potato. I pondered on it as I followed Allan's petite and perky ass out of the back rooms of the house. The music grew in volume as we passed through the main living room and back out onto the patio.

The rest of the group was locked in a game of flip cup with some other guys.

"Danny! Allan!" Josh called when we walked up.

"Hey! Looking good!" Craig called when he caught sight of me.

"Yeah, great job with the pants, baby!" Amir said to Allan, handing him another drink.

"You know," said Josh, "I think you're just missing one last touch."

He took one of his own two gold chains and draped it around my neck.

"There," he said with a broad grin. "Now, you look just right. You two wanna join us in flip cup?"

"Oh no," Allan said immediately. "I'm gonna go find me some special chocolates. I was told there would be some."

"Oh wait," I said, catching him by the hand as he turned to go. "What kind of special?"

"One of the guys we met at the beach said he makes his own 'shroom chocolates. Why, you want some?"

"Mushrooms, you mean?"

Allan laughed, closing his own hand around mine and pulling me with him. "Yeah. Come on, let's go find him."

He led me deftly through the crowd. I couldn't help being reminded of trying to get through the crowd at the club last night, but it definitely felt different as everyone was at least clothed more completely. When we reached the kitchen, Allan began inspecting the food spread.

"I think these look like them," he said, pointing at a small bowl of obviously homemade chocolate cubes, flecked with bits of nuts, fruits, and what might have looked like chopped mushrooms.

"Allan! You made it!"

Both of us jumped as the voice boomed in our ears and what I can only describe as a gay fairy draped himself across our shoulders. His make up was thick with glitter and his crown of iridescent leaves shone with sparkly rainbows. A glance down at his body revealed his outfit was made of wispy tulle bunched artfully around his hips. The rest of his bare skin was covered in more glitter and rhinestones, and to top it off, he was even sporting a pair of black butterfly wings.

"Hey! Yeah! It was Mab, right?" Allan said, valiantly recovering from the scare the man had given us and gesturing toward me. "This is Danny."

"

Queen

Mab, actually," he said directly to me in response. He offered me his hand to take while he performed a theatrical curtsy, never once taking his intense blue eyes off me. "Enchanté."

"Nice to meet you," I said, smiling at his whole persona. I must have been swept up in it, because I leaned forward and kissed his hand. He gasped and clutched the pearl choker that adorned his neck.

"Allan, dear, what a gentleman you've brought with you!"

"He's the best," Allan said with a smile and a touch of rose to his cheeks.

"Well, you two are certainly welcome to our little house for this delightful afternoon tea. How can I be of any service to you fine specimens?"

"Well," Allan began, "you mentioned some 'shroom chocolates at the beach."

"Oh! Yes, well, indeed you found them," Queen Mab said, facing Allan but leaning toward me and fumbling absently with the edges of my open shirt collar. My butt was already leaning against the table and I had nowhere to go.

My awkwardness must have shown on my face because Allan suppressed a laugh as he said, "Great, how many do you recommend."

"Well, stud, I'd say two's a trip, three's a party, and four..." he turned to face me with a flirty smile and ran a finger boldly down my chest hair, "... well let's just say that four's an experience." He wiggled his fingers and widened his eyes for effect before laying his palms fully on my pecs and moving entirely into my personal space. I could feel his thighs touching my own, he was so close.

"Perfect!" Allan said, a little forcefully, and pulled Queen Mab's attention again. "So, we'll just grab a few then and see how the night goes."

And with that he palmed a handful of the chocolates and nudged my body into moving sideways out from under Queen Mab's clutches.

"Thanks for saving me there," I leaned over to Allan's ear to say.

"You're cute," he said playfully. "I couldn't just leave you there at his mercy. He was going to eat you up alive!"

"Seriously!" I chuckled. "I feel like I just stared into the abyss."

Allan let out a raucous laugh and clutched my arm. I laid my own hand subconsciously over his as I joined in.

We got back to the group and there was enough for Allan, me and Josh to each have two with one left over.

"So you've never done 'shrooms before?"

"Never," I told Allan.

"Ok well, just take these two cubes and we'll see how you feel after that."

"Give me the third one," I said, feeling uncommonly daring.

"You sure? You don't want to do too much your first time."

"Bitch," I said, trying out how the word felt in my mouth, "I've already jumped into your guys' world head first. What more's a little mushrooms gonna do?" And I took three cubes from his hand and popped them in my mouth.

As the afternoon wore on, I began to feel a tingly, giddy feeling spread throughout my body. I talked myself through the onset as the colors of guys' shirts around me began to muddle and undulate. The beat of the music buzzed more intently through my chest and it felt as though I could literally not keep myself from smiling and laughing at the joyous absurdity of the party around me.

The sunlight streamed low through the open windows like great golden spotlights. Queen Mab's glittery form flitted through the crowd and everywhere guys were pumping and twisting their bodies to the music.

Our crew found ourselves in the middle of the dance floor, Josh continuing to pull free gifts of alcohol from strangers and the rest of us crowding around him in the revelry.

I felt Allan up close to me as we danced. I felt how we began to match our rhythm together despite the small gap between our bodies. I felt his hands brush my shirt as that gap closed; felt the small of his back and how he twisted and gyrated with the music - and with me. The feel of his shirt fabric on my palm was enticing. It flowed and shifted beneath my touch and sent tingles up my arm. I couldn't help exploring it with a second hand, and before I knew it, Allan and I were moving as one.

My own clothes felt at once like fire and ice where they made contact with my sensitive skin. As I inadvertently drew Allan's lithe body close to mine, drinking in the intoxication of his closeness, I noticed that I'd popped a full hard on.

"Damn, do mushrooms make you horny?" I asked, completely unabashed.

"Usually," he responded, leaning back slightly to look me in the face. "Why?"

"Well, I..." I stammered and faltered, "I... uh..."

Allan looked around us then, and I followed his gaze. The others were all dancing a little way away. Benji and Amir were making it rain imaginary dollars at Josh, who was standing on a bench and voguing over the crowd. Craig was making out with some rando in the corner.

Allan turned back to me and I suddenly felt his hand run over the outside of my pants and grip my obvious erection. I gasped audibly, but didn't flinch.

"Oh daddy," Allan said in a sultry voice. "I guess they make you horny too."

I laughed nervously, as his hand began to stroke my dick through my pants. But still, I didn't move away. The sexual energy boost that was evidently coming from the mushrooms ricocheted back and forth across my flesh, and my breathing was becoming shallow and urgent.

"I could see yesterday that you had a nice package," Allan continued, "but I gotta say, the

feel

of it is even more impressive."

His face was getting closer to mine as the mushroom gravity pulled us nearer. Waves of pleasure seemed to pulsate between our skins and I looked down to notice the full plumpness of his lips. He continued to stroke my ever-hardening cock and I lost myself in a desire to taste him.

When his lips brushed mine, however, I suddenly pulled back, remembering with a crashing shock that we were still in a very public space with my own brother just over my shoulder. What would he even say if he saw me like this with one of his friends. I turned my head, a little frantically, to see where the others were.

They were still in the same places, unphased and unaware of Allan and myself.

"Come on," Allan said, pulling my attention back and grabbing my hand again. "Let's go find a quieter spot."

"A- a, a what?" I asked thickly.

Damn, do mushrooms make your tongue bigger too?

He laughed and just said, "Come on."

Intoxicated as I was, I was in no position to argue with my hyperstimulated sex drive, and so I tightened my grip on Allan's delicate hand as he led me again into the depths of the house.

What are you doing, Dan?

-It's not Dan, it's Danny, just now.

The mushrooms replied.

Oh fuck that! It's just some stupid game that Josh is playing. I'm not gay!

-You say that, Danny boy. But if that's true, why don't you let go of his hand?

I thought about it (I did!) as the music faded behind us and the crowd thinned. Allan poked his head into one room and then closed the door again shaking his head. But instead, I tightened my grip as he started up some stairs and I followed.

-You see? Can't do it, can you?

Ok, so what if I can't. I don't want to be rude!

-HA! You know that's bullshit!

What's bullshit?

-Come on, Danny, you're curious.

No!

-Yes, you are. It's why you're staring at his ass right now.

Allan's body effortlessly navigated the stairwell, his tailored clothes accentuating the places where he swayed his hips or revealed some skin. My 'shroom mind recalled the feel of his suave skin under my palms at the beach.

Ok so what if I AM staring at his ass. What's it to, ya?

-Oh, nothing. Nothing at all,

my 'shroom brain said, fading away as Allan peeked into another room and pulled me inside.

I finally released his hand and closed the door behind me, my hands shaking slightly. I turned to face him.

"Hey listen, Dan-"

"Danny, remember?" I said with an awkward chuckle.