The Ben Downing Story
I'm not going to begin by attempting to persuade you to believe that I'm really a good person, I'm not. That statement is supported by the simple premise of my story today.
You see, I'm now sitting in an adult theater in the back of an adult video store. I'm a happily married man (for nearly 30 years) and my wife is a good person and a good wife.
I'm here today because over the course of several years I've gradually become uncontrollably cock-hungry. You read that correctly. Today, a man considered upstanding, straight and respected, known by the good name Ben Downing, has chosen to risk all that he has built to satiate his hunger for a single helping, a mere taste, of another man's seed. Compelled by unseen forces to taste and bestow pleasure upon another man sexually, and accept into my body his cock and his seed, the seed of a random stranger in fact.
I am indeed not a good person. Hi, I'm Ben and this is my story.
For as long as I can remember I have been bi-curious. I fought the thoughts and feelings whole heartedly for my entire adult life but as time has worn on, I have worn down. Homosexuality was not acceptable in my community and my family so even as my strength diminished, I continued the fight but tonight I will confess my defeat. Surrender to my demons. I am unapologetic. I actually feel euphoric. As if heavy burden is lifted.
My new friend Anthony and I are sitting together in this theater, on the bench where we met just an hour and a half ago...
Today had started out routinely, coffee, a bath, breakfast and into my office to work for a few hours.
At some point in the late morning my wife poked her head in and told me she was off to a spa day with a friend and would probably go shopping after that.
"If I'm not back by dinner time there's meat loaf in the fridge." She said.
And with that she was gone...
Without hesitation or thought my loins trembled just a bit and my brain followed them down the now familiar path. I began to imagine scenarios that could put an anonymous penis within my reach. I wasn't looking for a man or a relationship, just an attractive and clean cock.
Within minutes I'd shut down my work computer and began to search for a solution to my carnal needs on my phone. I had committed at that point in time to follow through and become my true self, a cocksucker, and to make it happen today.
I'd recently heard that there were adult video stores in a town about a half an hour away. I could certainly get there and back in what I knew would be at least a four-hour window. Without a second thought I was in my car and on my way following the GPS on my phone to the AVS that was recommended.
Arriving at a blackened storefront with no markings but the XXX ADULT over the front door (on the back of the building) I sensed that I had found my destiny. I mustered all my courage, walked bravely from my car and pulled open the heavy black door.
As I slowly entered the store I felt that I had entered a portal and was now dwelling in an alternative universe. My skin tingled and my nerves were on edge. I scanned the room and noticed the sex toys and lingerie. Black lights and pink neon provided a odd but comforting ambience. There were also racks of adult videos for as far as the eye could see.
I noticed a couple of other guys looking around as well. They'd probably been there before I surmised because they seemed to know their way around and appeared to be very relaxed and comfortable -- unlike myself.
I continued to slowly walk further into the store. My excitement escalated with every strong heartbeat that I felt in my chest.
I'd read about places like this so many times that it felt as though I'd been here before. The feelings I was experiencing by actually being here were not something I'd anticipated from reading about it though. Soon I confirmed that there were in fact two doors at the back, just as I had read about.
Next to the doors a sign read "tokens required beyond this point."
As I looked down at the rack of dildos in front of me, I began to formulate an excuse to ask someone for help-- assistance in moving this process forward. I needed to understand the next step in my quest to taste another man and feel what it's like to have him in my mouth...
Should I grab one of these and take it up to the counter by the door? That might give me a reason to ask somebody a question or two... I thought to myself.
Just then a sweet voice rang out from behind me and to my left.
"Can I help you, sweetie?"
I spun around nervously only to see an older sweet looking woman sitting on a stool behind a counter in a plexiglass booth. I blushed but quietly made my way toward the counter.
"First time here, honey?" she asked.
Yes, I replied in a whisper.
