The C&s Club

Saturday Night

With the money and phone taken care of, my burden bag feels a lot lighter. The worries about Mom and sis never go away, but at least they have some money in the bank now and a phone on the way in the mail. No, the worry never goes completely away, but I've done all I know to do. Part of me feels guilty for being so happy — here I am trying on some of my new clothes and getting ready to go out — I guess it's a date? Just the realization of this is almost like a dream — I've come so far in such a short time. Part of me still wants to say no — no, I'm not gay. Aaron's words come back to mind; 'I'm more bi than gay.' I think that fits me better too. Just because I've never found the right girl doesn't mean I don't want to — I jack-off looking at them in porn. But I love what Aaron and I have — and I love him, I feel it.

"So have you decided what to wear tonight?"

"Not really, so many options I can't decide. But I was thinking about what you said how you're bisexual and not gay — I think that's me too. I like girls and think they're beautiful. And I also like you and think you're beautiful. Doesn't that make me bisexual?"

"I think it makes you whatever you feel inside. There's no on and off switch, there's no magic line to cross. But if you think women are arousing, then I wouldn't disagree that you're bisexual. Have you ever had sex with a woman?"

"No, not really. But I jerk off to porn with men and women, or lesbians — but I also jerk off to gay and bi stuff."

"Why don't we just say that both of us are open minded and willing to explore, eh?"

"I think that sounds perfect."

It's obvious that there is an open wound from something that makes him feel that being gay is terribly wrong. Maybe in time he'll open up more and we can bury all of that. I could care less what we call this we've been given, I just see it as a beautiful gift. "Don't worry about the labels Shannon, just look inside and let your feelings and intuition be your guides."

"I know you're right — I've just heard so much bad talk ... it's hard to make it shut up sometimes."

"Don't try to fight what's inside Babe, I think just go with the flow awhile — meet some new people, like tonight. It takes some time to settle into a new life. Just follow your feelings, I think they'll guide you onto the right path "

"I'm going to do that Aaron. I'm not letting anyone make me be someone I'm not."

"Does that include yourself Shannon? Make sure it's not your own negative thoughts and fears that make the decisions. Here, try this on with this shirt."

Aaron has once again said all the right words to chase away my doubts — and I know it's more than my doubts, it's also the ceaseless negative narrative that I've heard at home and school for so long. I just need to accept that those people will never accept me if I go down this path— and I can't change that. And really, if they have the right to not accept me — then I have the right to not accept them.

"Now I like that combo! That shirt goes perfect with those pants. Let's see the undies again, just in case your pants accidentally happen to come off at the club tonight"

Aaron pulls me back into his world and I smile as I unbutton my pants for him. I watch his eyes and the smile on his face as I pull them down for him.

"Wow! They're sure making some sexy underwear now — when I was younger it was mostly cotton and drab colored briefs."

"It does feel good to have these clothes on — I really can't thank you enough for all you've done for me."

"I've enjoyed it Babe. You've brightened up my life, so I need to thank you too."

***

The drive out to the C & s Club took about forty minutes. The club is in a lovely area and looks rather lonely except for the number of cars and pickup trucks in the gravel parking area. I can feel my nerves build up as the big moment draws closer — I'm already glad that Aaron elected to postpone my initiation on-stage until another night. I want to do it ... just not tonight.

"Well, it ain't much ... but it's ours. Welcome to the Cock & suckers Club."

"Thank you for bringing me. This should be interesting."

"I think you'll like it. Come on, let's go see what's happening tonight. Looks like a good crowd."

The moment we walk through the front door, the overall joviality of the crowd makes it feel welcoming. There's a good number of men inside, but it doesn't feel crowded. As my eyes adjust to the dimmer lighting, I begin to consciously try to pick out the Cocks from the cocksuckers — it doesn't take long to see a pattern of more masculine men and the men who are followers — the cocksuckers like me. I see one man on his knees giving a blowjob right out in plain view and he's actually pretty muscular. I guess it's only natural that cocksuckers come in all sizes and shapes. But I notice that a lot of the cocksuckers tend to stay close to their man, just like I'm doing with Aaron. The clothes too tell part of the story for many couples, the cocksuckers dress a little nicer while many of the Cocks are in jeans and more plain attire. But there's no real pattern it seems — I guess I was expecting a more obvious distinction between the Cocks and the suckers. Still, I'm glad Aaron bought me these nicer clothes and he himself is the best looking of all the Cocks I've seen so far. That he is leading me around by the hand to greet many of his friends clearly marks me as a cocksucker, and this stirs within me an oddly arousing feeling that I now recognize as submissiveness. I soak it up and notice the eyes of many of the Cocks as they check me out — my first thought is that this must be how a pretty woman feels on her man's arm as all the other men ogle her. My second thought is an unexpected feeling of being proud — proud of being Arron's possession and proud that other men are looking at me knowing that I'm Aaron's cocksucker. I never imagined it would feel like this to be openly out ... the feelings of that sweet humiliation stir my arousal as Aaron leads me around and introduces me to his friends.

After a round of greetings, Aaron leads me toward a table where another nice looking masculine man is sitting with someone who is obviously a cocksucker like me. They both see him and smile their welcome as the cocksucker scoots his chair closer to the big man to make room for us.

"Hi Carl, how are you and Tony doing?" Aaron asks.

"We're both doing great Aaron, and who is this pretty young fellow you've brought?"

"I'd like you both to meet Shannon and make him feel at home here." Turning to me he says. "Shannon, this is Carl and this young man here is Tony. Carl and Tony were the very first ones to get on the stage there and share their relationship with us. They're sort of legends around here."

"Oh, poof! Don't you believe it Shannon. Without Aaron, there wouldn't even be a clubhouse at all. You two want a beer?"

"Sure, I'm pretty parched."

"Tony, why don't you take young Shannon here and go get us all something to drink. You can show Shannon around if you want."

"Are there any folks planning to be onstage tonight Carl?"

"Yeah, Brad Winston has a new cocksucker who wants to display his devotion. You've missed several new couples who've joined recently. Heck, there may also be some impromptu demonstrations — you know how that goes, one couple gets the fire burning in someone who's watching. How about you, is Shannon getting on his knees tonight?"

"We've talked about it and he wants to. But to be honest, I don't think he's quite ready — still has some things to work out in his head first ... you know the story."

"Yeah, sadly I do. But we both know it's harder on the cocksuckers to accept their desires than it is for us who get their service."

"That's true. Thankfully Shannon is really smart and he thinks things through — so far he's put all the pieces together and I think he's turned that corner from denial to acceptance of what he wants. It's good to see you and Tony are going strong."

"Yeah, don't say anything to anyone, but we've been talking about what it would be like to make it official. It's a big step for us both 'cause both of our families are in the dark about our relationship."

"Sounds like you and Tony are having some of the same kinds of talks as Shannon and I have been having. We haven't actually said the word marriage, but we've talked about the importance of being open and true about who we are. Living here in such a progressive place makes it easier, but it's still not all smooth sailing for anyone."

"Speaking of those two, I think we might have gotten dumped — weren't they supposed to bring us a couple of beers?"

"Now that you mention it, I think you might be right Carl. But honestly, I hope Tony shows him around a bit and introduces him to some of the other cocksuckers so he can see he's not alone. He knows deep down who he is and what he wants, but seeing others like him will help him I think. I'll go get those beers and you keep an eye out for our bois."

***

"So you were really the first one to be on stage — that must have been quite an experience Tony."

"It was pretty wild. It was Carl's idea, and to be honest, he had to talk me into it. But once we got started it seemed like it was just us doing what we do alone. When it was over, seeing all those faces looking at us was — well, it was definitely a new experience. But the energy in the club was all positive and everyone was smiling and clapping. And after we broke the ice, it's been one after another who decide to share themselves like that. I'm guessing that you and Aaron plan on doing a show at some point?"

"Yeah, we had planned on doing it tonight — but we had sex earlier today and after we talked some more we decided it would be better if I had a chance to see the club and meet some other people and stuff."

"I hear what you're saying, and I think Aaron made a good decision. Carl and I have been together for quite a long time, so we were really comfortable with each other. The idea of being watched turned us both on too — so it wasn't too big of a step for me or him. Plus, the number of guys watching that first day of the clubs existence was way less than it is now. I mean the day we were here it was the first time anyone has been inside this place in years. It was a mess. But Carl wanted to at least give everyone a glimpse of what we could all make out of this place — and it worked. You wanna meet some of your fellow cocksuckers?"

"Sure, lead the way." I follow as Tony leads us toward the back part of the building.

"You really wouldn't believe how run down this place was that first day. The dust and trash was everywhere, and the place was dark and pretty gloomy. Everything you see here now was done and made possible by members pitching in for work details and money to fix the place up. It's a pretty unique set-up, and I know Aaron played a big part in both finances and legal stuff in the beginning. I'm taking you to the cocksuckers lounge area, there's usually a few of us hanging out there."

Upon entering the lounge, I can see that Tony is right. There are a half dozen guys here. One guy is putting nail polish on the toes of another. Another is brushing the long blond hair of a guy about my age. And two are just sitting and talking on one of the sofas.

"Hey guys, this is Shannon and you'll never guess who his man is."

"Don't do that to us Tony — who's he with?"

Before Tony can answer, I decide to jump in with both feet. "I'm Aaron Harding's cocksucker." It feels weird to describe myself like this, but it doesn't seem to phase anyone. It does instigate a lot of interest though.

"Oh, you lucky bitch — Aaron's a hot Cock for sure."

"Lucky you, as you can see, we all have an eye for Aaron."

"Are you going on stage tonight?"

"Ah, no ... Aaron just brought me here to introduce me and show me what the club is all about. I guess we'll be on stage at some point though — but he said, not tonight. Are any of you going on stage tonight?"

"I am. I'm Manuel, but just call me Mani — nice to meet you Shannon."

I take the offered handshake and he pulls me into a hug, "Welcome to the club Shannon. You're going to feel right at home soon enough."

Mani is small, like me. But he is even more feminine in his appearance than me. His eyes are deep brown and his skin is a smooth mocha color. His black hair is tied back into a ponytail. "Thanks Mani. Aaron told me I'd meet some good people here and it does feel good to be here with so many like-minded people. Have you been on the stage before?"

"No, this will be my first time. That's why we're all back here. Everyone else here has been on stage at least once, and they're here to help get me ready and keep me calm. That's sort of a joke though, how can I keep calm when I'm going on a stage?"

"You'll be fine Mani. You're so cute everyone will fall in love with you no matter what you do. Also, you said earlier that your man Chris wants to breed you after you suck him hard, is that still on?" One of the other guys asks. He looks at me and offers his hand and says, "I'm Brandon, welcome to the club Shannon."

"Yeah, he wants to do that Brandon."

Brandon sits next to Mani so they can talk. "I assume you've douched good before coming down here?"

"Yeah, I did one earlier and haven't eaten anything. Then I did another just before we drove out."

"Good. That should do it. Does your man's cock usually go in pretty easy? I'm asking because sometimes guys will use a butt-plug backstage here to get opened up — you want it to slide right in. Does his cock usually go in easy?"

"No, not always. And I didn't use a butt-plug. Should I worry?"

"No. The reason I asked is so you don't have to worry. We keep a set of stainless steel plugs on hand here. One of us takes them home after every Saturday get together and runs them through a dishwasher — so they're clean. If you want, we can help you get opened up. It's your call, but it's usually a good idea just so things go smoothly on-stage. Plus, for a lot of guys, it helps them get in the right headspace to get bred. Your call though."

"I think I should do that Brandon. I want everything to be perfect."

"You won't be sorry. Do you want to do it alone or here with our help?"

"I think it would be fun to have you guys put it in."

"Okay, take your pants off and I'll get the plugs and lube."

As Brandon goes through a door that looks like a small office, we all turn our attention to Mani. He's wearing a black satin shirt with leggings of black lycra. His shoes are a black fabric with a thin rubberized sole. When Mani pulls his leggings off, his pink panties shine even in this lighting. He's a beautiful man and I suddenly feel more at home here with these strangers than I can ever remember being with a new group— I've found people who are like me and it feels really good.

Brandon comes back in short order with a small black case, a bottle of alcohol to make sure the plugs are clean and a bottle of lubricant.

"Okay Mani, come over and lean on the counter — you can hand your panties to Shannon to hold."

Mani stands in front of me and eases his underwear over his hips and down his legs to the floor. He's standing less than two feet from my face and I can't stop myself from looking at his dick. It's actually very pretty — his black bush isn't curly but mostly straight fine shiny hair. I can't tell if it's trimmed or naturally sparse and his ball sack has no hair at all. His dick is small, much like mine except he is uncircumcised — just the tip of his head peeks out where his pee-hole is. I want to see him completely naked but I look at what's on view and we just exchange smiles. As he turns to go get his butthole plugged, I admire his plump butt and smooth curves. If I didn't know he was a guy, I'd think I was looking at the bare butt of a young woman. In some vicarious understanding, I realize what Aaron sees when he looks at me — and another notch of self-acceptance registers within my soul. I've been teased about having a 'girly butt' and if I look half as sexy as Mani — no wonder Aaron gets hard for me.

"Okay Mani, just lean over the counter — good, I'm going to touch you to put some lube on."

The room is silent and every eye is on the target of Mani's butthole. Brandon squeezes a few drops of lube on his crack just above his hole, quickly puts some on a finger and begins to massage it around and around Mani's opening. With every passing moment I am appreciating the beauty of Mani and men like us.

"Okay Mani, how big is your man's cock — can you choose the plug you want to take?"

I can't see which one he chooses, but when Brandon picks it up I can tell it's definitely not the smallest plug in the box. The room is dead silent as he coats it with more lube and with his left hand holding Mani's butt crack open — he slowly inserts it with a rolling motion and short in and out pushes until Mani's muscles suck it all the way in.

"There, how does that feel — too big?"

"No, it feels perfect. Would you mind working it in and out a few times to stretch my sphincter ring a bit?"

"My pleasure Mani — you do know you have a beautiful ass, don't you?"

"Chris, my man, tells me that — I guess it could be worse and he seems to like it."

"Well, I've seen a lot of butts and you have a pretty one. So just remember that when you're up there naked and taking the cock — everyone in the room will be thinking how lucky Chris is to have you under him. This plugs going in pretty easy now, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it feels really good, no pain at all."

Brandon pulls it out and shows it to Mani as he leans on the countertop, "Is Chris's cock-head much bigger than the fattest part of this plug — just your best estimate?"

"I think that looks about his size. I don't want to be too loose."

"No, we don't want that. If you want to keep it loose, you can take it now and just use it as you think best. And don't mind the rest of us, we'll just enjoy our front row seats and watch you."

Mani laughs at the small bit of humor, "No, it's not you guys I get nervous about — but all those other eyes seeing my most private parts ... and watching me get bred."

"Don't think about them as Chris fucks you. Just think about how proud he is of you — make him feel like the man tonight Mani. Focus on that as your main job — make your man look good — make it seem he's the best Cock in the world. Forget the crowd and focus on Chris, and you'll be great."

"Thank you Brandon, thank you for everything — for making this a lot easier."

"That's what we do here Mani, we take care of each other."

After a few more minutes of opening himself, Mani is satisfied that he's open. He leaves the plug in and joins us with a handful of paper towels to sit on. We all settle back into the sofas and the talk continues on in a casual way. I listen more than talk, especially to the advice and encouragement for Mani who will soon be on-stage sucking his man — and obviously getting fucked by his man too. It all seems so normal to everyone, and I find myself feeling more normal too. I also find myself becoming aroused as the conversation digs into how to best position yourself on stage, how to be eager in sucking the cock of your man, how to lick up the inside of his thighs and nuzzle his nuts — how to smell of his sex with a big breath and exaggerated smile up at your man — and even how to position your head so those watching can see your tongue licking your man's asshole. It makes me think of what must take place off camera in a porn shoot. I'm both glad I'm here and glad Aaron decided to postpone my own show of submission to another night. I want to be as confident and practiced as these guys are when I show the world how I feel about Aaron. It's Tony who finally jumps in to remind me that Aaron and Carl are waiting for us and the beers we went to get.