The Obnoxious Nerd...
So...
The other night, I'm nursing a drink at my favorite bar. I'm a regular there, all the bartenders know me as I come there that often. I'm minding my own business, chatting with Darcie, the bartender as much as possible when she's not at her station making drinks for her other customers. I have a huge crush on her and have always wanted to ask her out, but never had the nerve to yet, still, we're friends for now. She does flirt with me often, but probably just to increase her tips. Whatever, I enjoyed our banter and fantasize about her being my girlfriend or more. I had a long grueling day at work and I had just stopped in at Happy Hour for a few drinks, thinking an appetizer or two off their menu would be my dinner.
It was a slow night as it was a weekday, so my favorite watering hole, which was an upscale hotel/bar, was pretty empty. There were just a few hotel guests in town having a cocktail before starting their evening.
I am freshly out of a platonic relationship that had lasted about 3 months. All that time and money I spent chasing this girl that I had the hots for, not even getting laid. Then suddenly she dropped a bombshell on me, telling me her ex-boyfriend was back in town and she was gonna try to work things out with him. That's happened to me with more than one girl. I hadn't had sex with anything other than my hand in a very long time, so I wouldn't rule out the idea that in the back of my mind I might meet a hot woman there tonight and get lucky.
Recently I discovered adult bookstores. I occasionally drove to that neighboring town and discreetly visit the adult arcades. They have gloryholes there and I would just get my cock sucked and leave. I'm not gay by any means, but I really needed some attention, so I began to visit often. I never reciprocated on sucking cocks back for them. Once, I actually fucked a young guy in his ass through the gloryhole, and yes I wore a condom for that. Again, I never sucked a cock or reciprocated, I just went there to get my always eager horny circumcised 8" cock taken care of. I'm blessed with a huge fat dick, but cursed that I have no girlfriend to use it on. Not to sound cocky, but I know I am pretty well endowed.
A little more about me, I'm not a big guy, 5' 10"s tall, 27 years old, could stand a few extra pounds and some muscle, but I am semi-toned, at least not flabby, mostly just thin to be honest. I'm about 170 lbs, in good shape and I think I'm considered above average in looks.
So, I'm sitting there having a drink when this guy comes in and sits next to me at the bar, actually pulling his bar stool a few inches closer to me than I prefer before seating himself. I mind my own business to his closer than customary proximity to me, other than greeting him with a vanilla "How you doing?" which he nodded casually to as a response.
"Hey Sweetie, get me a Strawberry Daiquiri with a straw asap." he rudely announced to Darcie, a lot louder than necessary.
Darcie tried to hold back a frown and remain polite, as she works for tips, and replied, "I'll be right with you sir."
Ignoring him and not looking his way, I study him discreetly in the large bar mirror in front of us, occasionally glancing his way a few times.
This guy is wearing some kind of a stereotyped nerd outfit, almost like a Halloween costume, which matches his geeky looks. I think to myself that he makes the guys on the Big Bang Theory look like they belonged on the cover of GQ.
He was smaller than me, a true runt, probably 25ish, maybe 5'6"s tall and as skinny as a rail. I'm guessing 130-135 pounds. He actually had on khaki pants with cuffs, white socks and Hush Puppy penny loafers, unbelievably with bright shiny copper pennies in them. He wore an overly tight, white button down short sleeved shirt, buttoned to the next to top button, that looked clearly a size too small. If he had a plastic pocket protector with 10 pens in it, coupled with some tape on his black horn rimmed glasses, he could of gotten the leading role of the geek's on Revenge of the Nerds.
While waiting for his pussyfied girly daiquiri, he asks me way too loudly and as if we are close acquaintances, "So where are all the ho's at?"
I almost laughed out loud at his comment as Darcie asked him to please watch his language.
As she placed his drink neatly on a napkin in front of him, he handed her his room card and replied as cocky as could be, "Thanks baby girl, put it on room and keep them coming."
Darcie rolled her eyes a bit, but smiled politely, seemingly trying to refrain herself the best she could in not telling him to "fuck off", and she's the type of girl that would do it, but held her comments and walked away.
"What's got her panties in a twist", he asked me a little louder than he should of. "I was thinking of asking her back to my room if she played her cards right."
Again, I almost laughed in his face. He didn't stand a snowball's chance in Hell with her. I was on my fourth John Jameson on the rocks, which is really more than it sounds like, as Darcie pours my drinks very heavy, a regular's perk. I was tempted to tell this pipsqueek off, telling him to mind his manners, but let it slide. I was pretty buzzed and horny, feeling the need to either ride to the adult bookstore and hopefully get a bj, or go home and rub one out before going to sleep. I was pretty drunk and never had my appetizers for dinner as I planned.
Instead, I politely and diplomatically told him that she is totally out of his league and he would probably get thrown out of the bar if he kept this charade up. Darcie, still in hearing distance of our conversation, turned and smiled at me, but was acting like she wasn't listening. When I told him Darcie was a friend of mine and then asked him politely to back off his flirting, implying he doesn't stand a chance.
He looked insulted and said, "No girl is out of my league, I got a monster cock that they love. Once a girl gets some of my dick, they follow me around like a lost puppy forever."
I almost laughed out loud on that comment and noticed Darcie glanced our way again, but wasn't sure she could hear us. Just trying to imagine a big cock on his diminutive girlish frame, made me shake my head and snigger.
"What are you laughing about? You don't believe me? I bet you my cock is bigger than yours." he replied.
"Yea, whatever dude, I'm sure it is." I openly laughed.