Turning the Corner

Turning the corner with Miss Melissa

Author's note

Miss Melissa is (was, sadly) a real person. We were close even though we never met. This story is my attempt to capture who she is. Lots of the dialogue is taken from our real conversations and based on part of my own life and sexual exploration.

Turning the corner -- A brief introduction to Miss Melissa

We pick up in the middle of my (sort of) relationship with a somewhat dominant, not really, but kink friendly, woman that I had met about a year ago or so at the time of this conversation. For all intents and purposes, I was her nude houseboi, and I loved it. She lived in San Francisco at a time when the nudity laws were very lax. I took advantage of it to explore my exhibitionism. At this point in my life, I was exploring bdsm mainly through fetlife. I discovered I was submissive and service oriented.

She seemed to enjoy, but I can't say she had the initiative to be a Domme. But, what was good, this was really the first time my sexuality started evolving. I was able to admit to her, with Miss Melissa's encouragement, that I wanted to suck cock. She encouraged me to act on my urges, but that was all the guidance she was willing to give. Our relationship was nearing and end point. I didn't think I was going to get more out of it, and I was realizing she just wasn't willing to go in the directions I really needed.

Miss Melissa was a big influence on me. I met her first on Literotica! We ended up chatting regularly around this time. This isn't a totally real account, but it is based on our conversations at the time.

Over text...

Miss Melissa -- How's your new girl?

Me -- I don't know if I'm feeling it.

Miss Melissa -- Oh? You seemed into her. Is she still cool with your 'tendencies?'

Me -- Yeah, she doesn't want anything to do with it, but she's encouraging.

Miss Melissa -- Ooh. Not as fun for you.

Me -- Not as much.

Miss Melissa -- If you had sex with a man does she want you to tell her?

Me -- Yes, I think she'd be down.

Miss Melissa -- Not as fun though.

Me -- No, the encouragement does a lot for me.

Miss Melissa -- Can do it on your own? Let yourself be more gay? I feel like it's in there.

Me -- I don't know.

Miss Melissa -- She pegged you. That's kind of helping.

Me -- She wasn't into it. I could tell.

Miss Melissa -- Oh so only the one time.

Me -- Yeah.

Miss Melissa -- Bummer. I wish my sissy liked it more.

Me -- Not as domme as I was hoping either.

Miss Melissa -- Oh I thought she was.

Me -- She said but not really.

Miss Melissa -- That's too bad. You really liked being her house boi. Nude house boi.

Me -- Oh, she liked that for sure. I think the total nudity was getting to her.

Miss Melissa -- Does she not like hot nude guys? I mean. Come clean my house. The kitchen alone.

Me -- Yeah but walking the dogs, taking out the garbage.

Miss Melissa -- Hee. It's still ok over there though, no? She doesn't do it?

Me -- Oh yeah, but it's mostly all the gay dudes. No, but she knows I like cfnm and I think she found out she liked it too.

Miss Melissa -- She went with you to Folsom. That's kind of gay. cfnm is kind of hot. You seem way more into the exhibitionism.

Me -- It's bdsm. But yeah that's why I wanted to go.

Miss Melissa -- But the dudes are gay. They saw you with her and thought it. She wore clothes?

Me -- They probably did. She was clothed.

Miss Melissa -- You loved it.

Me -- Oh, for sure. But same, just the one time.

Miss Melissa -- That's so hot. I wish I could go.

Me -- You'd love it. Maybe that's why.

Miss Melissa -- Just looking at the pics online makes me wet. And they're not even x rated. Why what.

Me -- You'd be running around grabbing so much ass. Too gay for her.

Miss Melissa -- Can you do that? hmmm. Too gay for her? I have to think about that. It's not like she doesn't know you're kind of gay. Bi? I don't know.

Me -- There's stickers you wear that say 'ask first'. But everyone is cool. I figured she would like showing me off to men as her boi.

Miss Melissa -- mmmmm. Did she? I would. Did you wear a collar?

Me -- No, I should have. Cock ring though. I think she liked it for a little while, but I think her cup fills up fast.

Miss Melissa -- She can only have you so gay, but you're kind of pushing past that line. I mean, a cock ring; nude around other men. That's getting to a level of gay you haven't before.

Me -- I know. I think she was a little surprised. I think she's glad she went.

Miss Melissa -- Did you go home and fuck?

Me -- No. I left my dog at home and it was getting late. And class in the morning.

Miss Melissa -- Oh it's on Sunday.

Me -- Yeah.

Miss Melissa -- How gay do you think you would have got if she let you?

Me -- Like what?

Miss Melissa -- Jerk a guy? Suck?

Me -- I think I could have. Jerk, easy. I would have to get really in a subspace to suck in public. I wasn't wearing a mask or anything so I can't be interviewing and end up on the internet on my knees.

Miss Melissa -- Fair. Still though, it must have felt great to get to that place.

Me -- Oh for sure. Really freeing because not a ton of guys were fully nude.

Miss Melissa -- Oh wow. Good for you then. And just presenting yourself out like that.

Me -- Like what?

Miss Melissa -- Seeing you with her. She's clothed, you're nude. Her sub.

Me -- I certainly liked it. She was kind of nonchalant, but she liked looking at the people too.

Miss Melissa -- Maybe you'll take it up a notch next time. Just rub cocks. Maybe jerk a little.

Me -- I think I could with help.

Miss Melissa -- It'll come easier than you think. I know you better than she does. hey ttyl it's 5 out here.

A couple of weeks later...

Miss Melissa -- Have you been over there since Folsom?

Me -- No. Not yet. Giving her some breathing room.

Miss Melissa -- So you think she isn't into you being more gay?

Me -- And the discipline. She just doesn't say much.

Miss Melissa -- You told her right off the bat. Did you ask? About the discipline too.

Me -- I try, but she doesn't communicate well. I couldn't believe I did. And she was cool with it.

Miss Melissa -- I was so proud of you. Coming out like that irl. That's the most important part.

Communication. What did she say about the discipline.

Me -- I know. And you can't put it on someone who can't lift that. She was intrigued but never got past that.

Miss Melissa -- Do you still fuck?

Me -- Not for a while. After the pegging she was just more drawn I guess?

Miss Melissa -- How often did you do anal?

Me -- All the time.

Miss Melissa -- So you'd fuck normal first and then finish off in her ass?

Me -- No, just the ass. But not since the pegging.

Miss Melissa -- No pussy? I didn't know that. I thought she was a fiend for getting her ass ate too.

Me -- It hasn't come up since.

Miss Melissa -- Do you miss it?

Me -- Not so far.

Miss Melissa -- But you still went over to be her house boi? After the pegging?

Me -- Yes.

Miss Melissa -- And that was ok you didn't fuck at all?

Me -- I still enjoyed being there like that.

Miss Melissa -- hmmmmm. Can I say something?

Me -- Sure.

Miss Melissa -- Maybe you're coming to the end of sex with women. Maybe this is getting more real for you.

Me -- That's interesting.

Miss Melissa -- Not like you haven't had a lot anyway, but talking to you these years, bdsm is changing you. More open. You don't seem surprised either.

Me -- You saying it resonates with me. It's been liberating to learn about bdsm. Maybe that was it.

Miss Melissa -- And that freeing up is letting your sexuality evolve. Or maybe just rise up. That was what?

Me -- You get it. So maybe I was trying to imprint that on her.

Miss Melissa -- Imprint?

Me -- Maybe wanting her to be more like you are. But that's not her.

Miss Melissa -- Me? You thought of me like that?

Me -- Sure. Lots.

Miss Melissa -- I can't believe you didn't say anything!

Me -- I thought having a real life relationship with her would be healthier.

Miss Melissa -- I think that's good. I mean, she was kind of good for you.

Me -- I thought so. I certainly learned I like being submissive and it's a good relationship role for

me.

Miss Melissa -- Well that, but you're more gay now too. No?

Me -- Yeah I think you're right.

Miss Melissa -- You went to Folsom with her and look how good that went.

Me -- That just reinforced it for me.

Miss Melissa -- It felt good for you to explore. You need more.

Me -- Oh for sure.

Miss Melissa -- So maybe that's kind of where you are now.

Me -- Where?

Miss Melissa -- Maybe not totally gay, but sex with women is probably in your past now.

Me -- I like you though.

Miss Melissa -- You want to have sex with me though?

Me -- Does pegging count?

Miss Melissa -- lol no. You want to eat my pussy? You want to get hard and fuck me? Shoot your load in my wet cunt?

Me -- I never really thought of you like that.

Miss Melissa -- I know you like me but how do you think of me?

Me -- Domme definitely.

Miss Melissa -- I have to say, you really took to being a house boi. Submission is working well for you. I can tell you feel better just by our chats.

Me -- For sure.

Miss Melissa -- Was it better than the sex? Just being her house boi? Be honest.

Me -- I think so. Yes.

Miss Melissa -- It was easy for you to serve like that. No pressure for sex.

Me -- Pressure, yes. Great word. For sure. Almost a relief.

Miss Melissa -- Relief? Not having sex with her was a relief?

Me -- Yeah I could just focus on being her house boi.

Miss Melissa -- Are you hearing yourself?

Me -- What?

Miss Melissa -- When was the last time you did pussy?

Me -- Probably last year the first time we fucked but then we did anal anyway.

Miss Melissa -- Do you miss it? Be honest.

Me -- I haven't really thought about it.

Miss Melissa -- Wow. I think she helped you turn a corner.

Me -- How so?

Miss Melissa -- You're much gayer than I thought! I love it!

Me -- You think? I don't know. I still like some girls. You.

Miss Melissa -- But you've moved past a sexual need for women. And men turn you on sexually. You admitted it the first time I asked. I've got tons of gay sex pics we send all the time. There's no women in those is there?

Me -- hmmmm. Well no. It's easy to open up to you. You're naturally Domme and it fits really nice.

Miss Melissa -- We really get along like a house on fire and we've never met! Hey, it's cool! I think this is a huge breakthrough for you. How do you feel right now.

Me -- Humiliated.

Miss Melissa -- And you're probably hard as a rock.

Me -- Semi.

Miss Melissa -- That's what you were missing from her.

Me -- What?

Miss Melissa -- The humiliation. You wanted her to humiliate you for your (strong) gay tendencies but you said she's not a talker.

Me -- oh wow yeah. Part of it for sure.

Miss Melissa -- What's the other part?

Me -- Being the house boi. I certainly liked that.

Miss Melissa -- But both is ideal. And the cfnm.

Me -- Yes. Absolutely. I'm not sure what to do now with this.

Miss Melissa -- You're a new boi! hee. How are you feeling about this? It's a lot.

Me -- No, I feel good. Not sure what to tell her though.

Miss Melissa -- Yay! hmmm. Don't tell her anything. Just don't bother.

Me -- At all? Ghost her?

Miss Melissa -- Well, if she really wants a house boi she'll tell you. I don't think she's your problem. This is a new you to explore and if she's not willing to guide you and help you with what you really need, then don't waste your time.

Me -- Eh ok. Fuck it then.

Miss Melissa -- That was easy! lol

Me -- I feel pretty good. I need to work on this though.

Miss Melissa -- Yes you do. And Miss Melissa wants to help if you're interested.

Me -- Yes, please.

Miss Melissa -- I have to go pick my kid up, but here's an easy start. Don't talk to her anymore.

Me -- Deal.

Miss Melissa -- yay! ttyl gayboi!

So we're going to leave it there. This didn't happen exactly as it's written, but it's close. Miss Melissa was always encouraging me to act on my urges and grow. Next time I'll share my solo gay outing to Dore Alley festival!