My first Saturday night as a single man was turning out to be an excruciatingly long and lonely affair. Tiffany, my high school sweetheart, broke up with me after a 5 year relationship. She felt it had run its course and we more like roommates than a couple. Unfortunate because she was beautiful and the object of every man's attention. Even more unfortunate for me that we practiced abstinence and she wanted us to wait till marriage. Fall break was starting she left town without me. What else was there to do? I decided it was time to hit the local bar.
The plan wasn't to get too drunk. Well, maybe a drink or two as a nightcap. It justified the drive to the bar without a DD. As a newly single guy fresh out of a long term relationship, I didn't want to be without my faculties if I was going to try and get lucky. The bar wasn't more than a half mile away and I was there within minutes. Parked my car in the alley behind the building and made my way in.
As soon as I opened the door, the raucous scene inside hit me like a train. It was college football galore and the later games were playing on all the TVs across the main bar. The place was packed to the gills with what looked to be mostly college kids. It looked like it was going to be tougher to find a spot in here than it was for me to find a spot to park my car!
While scanning the place for any available chairs, my eyes caught two older men who were sitting alone in a booth next to the window. It took me a moment but I recognized them as two of the maintenance guys from our complex. The one facing me locked eyes with me and gave me a thumbs up. I was a little surprised that he recognized me. I gave him a nod in response and went on with my business, slowly weaving my path through the crowd of scantily clad girls and obnoxiously loud jocks and frat boys.
It wasn't long before I ran out of options. I ended up near the far end of the bar where the two janitors were sitting. "You can have a seat here, bud!" The man who gave me the thumbs up called out. "Don't sweat it, we're about to leave after this last few minutes!" He pointed at the game that was showing on the TV.
"N-nahh...I'll be fine!" I said, a little embarrassed since I was seemingly the only college-aged kid without a posse.
"You sure? Ya look a little lost there!" he grinned as he shifted himself over. His massive body made what was a two person bench look like a small chair. I smiled shyly as I eased into the booth next to him. Now, I kind of knew these guys. Our apartment had lots of random shit that would break or malfunction and we would have to call maintenance probably at least once a week, if I had to guess. Whenever they did come though, they'd linger for hours, usually trying to flirt with Tiffany while giving me winks. She seemed to thoroughly enjoy the attention.
"You drink?" he asked.
"Uh-huh," I replied. The big, tall mountain of a man next to was Bill and his co-worker seated across from him was Mark. Mark seemed like the strong, silent type. He was stockier in build, broad-shouldered and barrel-chested. He was completely bald and wore thick-rimmed bifocals and had a white mustache. Even though he was the shorter of the two, he was still well over 6 feet tall. He had a thick forest of gray hair running down his thick arms.
Sweat poured from Bill's cul-de-sac hairline. His gray-white hair transitioned almost seamlessly into his neckline and his upper back. His uniform was riddled with oil stains and grease. His forearms were as thick as my thighs and similarly covered with a thick brush of white hair. Faint tattoos could be seen going up from his forearm and into his bicep area. He looked like he played lineman at one point in his life. His arms were immense. The uniform was a couple of sizes too small around the waist as the buttons on his shirt struggled to contain his gut. He reeked of cigar smoke and alcohol as he spoke to me in a deep voice.
"So where's your girl...Tiffany, right?" he prodded.
"Yes, she went home for the break," I lamented. "We...we broke up."
"Aww? That's too bad. She is a cutie. Ain't that right, Marky?" Bill winked at his friend. "What happened, if I may ask?" Bill threw up a sign at the bartender, who immediately brought over a couple of shots of vodka and beer.
I was going to need some alcohol if we were going to talk about this. Bill didn't seem like the kind of guy I wanted to piss off. I downed the two shots of vodka to a round of applause from the two gruff men.
"She just wanted some time alone, wanted her own space. Felt like we were just together for too long," I answered, my words coming out slowly, making sure I was articulating well while paranoid that I was going to get too drunk too quickly.
"Sounds code talk for wanting some new dick, son!" Mark let out a deep throated laugh.
"She wasn't like that!" I glared up at Mark. "She believed in waiting until marriage!"
That led to even more laughter, this time Bill joined in. "So you mean to tell me that you never smashed that pussy? Oh hell no!"
"We were best friends and in love--," I started before being interrupted by Mark.
"Best friend is right, she friend-zoned you, baby boy!"
I was stunned. What else could I say?
"All the guys in the office wanted that piece, especially Rob," Mark added.
"Oh yeah...Rob was crazy about her! He'd try to get her to come into his office every time she came to give us that rent check! She'd be wearin' those tiny little bike shorts all them girls wear nowadays! Rob was packin' too from what I heard from his conquests!" Bill nudged me with his elbow, "But I bet you got nothin' to worry about, right?"
Their talk about Tiffany was nauseating and downright traumatic. Rob was a middle-aged man who happened to be the apartment manager. I couldn't imagine Tiffany having sex with any other man, but especially not Rob.
