Unqualifiedly Datable

**********

I had just walked out of the showers and was standing in front of my locker. I looked down at my cock, no surprise that I was hard and pointing straight up to the ceiling. I sighed; this was getting a bit ridiculous. I quickly put on a pair of boxer briefs and pulled on some cargo shorts then adjusted my cock, making me groan out loud.

"Got a present for Sara there, Jason?" I heard my teammate and best friend Adam asks me.

We are both on the hockey team, and I'm the captain of the team. Sara was my current 'girlfriend', basically she was my cover story. Just in the past two years I finally came to terms with myself that I was gay. I had not told anyone else yet because how do you tell a whole bunch of jock head that all those boners you popped while showering with them, was because of them, and not the sweet piece of ass girl waiting outside that's just dying to jump into bed with you?

"Oh yeah, you know it!" I said slowly. I towel dried my shaggy brown hair, and the swiped the towel across my chest that was sprinkled with fine brown hair. I quickly threw on a crew neck t-shirt that fit me a little tightly then grabbed my bag and headed out the door. Behind me I heard Adam laugh again.

"Hey, sexy! You looked hot out on that ice babe," Sara said with a mock pout. She was a small little girl with the 'killer' red hair and short curvy frame. I never really thought red heads were very hot, that's just me though. Sara was a sweet little woman that's not completely after the sex that's what made me choose her.

"Just a little, I worked up a sweat," I smiled.

"I was talking about you babe, you are sexy, hot, drool on the fool kind of hot!" she said smiling.

I never really thought of myself as overly sexy or hot. I thought I was rather plain. Brown hair, brown eyes, 6' 3" 200 pounds of pure muscle. I had hair fan out on my pecs and come together to trail down my abs and straight to my cock. I heard some girls say that I had a square jaw and chin... whatever that meant. I also always had a trail of girls behind me just waiting for me to dump my 'girlfriend'. "That's sweet of you,"

"That's all I get? I call you hot and you say that I am sweet gee thanks, jerk," she laughed. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and started towards her dorm.

**********

I was concentrating really hard the next day on balancing my pencil on its eraser end. That is until Chris, the little twerp, elbowed me in the side. I groaned loudly, and jerked up into a sitting position quickly. "Pay attention!" he hissed at me.

Alex was probably 6 feet even 180 pounds, he was fit, not hard like me, but muscular. He had long blond hair that hung into his grey eyes he had the most perfect lips that I have always wanted to kiss. He was cute, not popular like me but not antisocial, he was quiet but talkative to a select few.

I looked up to the board, math, I detested it! I realized I was completely lost. I was thinking about this weekend to much and forgot about the lecture. I rubbed my temples and saw the little twerp shake his head, sighing he pushed his notebook towards me.

He stayed with me after class so I could fully understand the material, he was great in math where I sucked at it. "Why don't you pay attention in class?" he asked after he had given me a problem to work on my own, making sure that I learned it correctly.

I looked up at him and grinned "hard to pay attention to anything when you have blue balls," I laughed, everyone knew that I was always horny, but I wasn't desperate, nor did I fuck like crazy. I wasn't known at that kind of guy. In fact I hardly fucked 'girlfriends' anymore, it just felt wrong.

Chris lent back into his chair and sighed shaking his head. I was staring at him, I always thought Chris was really hot. When my cell phone started ringing I jumped. He looked over at me with one eyebrow raised. I grabbed my phone it was Sara, I exhaled heavily and threw it on the desk.

Chris looked at it a moment then back to me, "you going to answer that?"

"Nah," I frowned as I stood up, grabbing my bag, I stuffed the phone in there, I tapped his note book after I slid it back over to him. "Thanks for the help, twerp, I'll see you Tuesday, and I promise to be good," I batted my lashes at him and started cracking up, as I started to turn I notice that Chris' face had turned red.

**********

Ah, sweet weekends! On the weekends I would always go to a gay bar in another town. I didn't want anyone to know that I was gay, and no one knew me in this town and no one would think to see me here. I walked in and went straight to the bar ordering myself a beer then started to look around the place for the one I would fuck senseless tonight.

I was more attracted to the small skinny, twinks, rather than the jock sort like me. Well except Chris, his body looked perfect in jeans and a t-shirt, I couldn't wait to see him completely bare for me to drool over.

I shook my head quickly getting that train of thought out of my head. I looked at the dance floor and watched the crowd, and the couples. You know those couples that always seem in love and are always taking advantage of those simple touches, caresses and kisses. I despised couples, they had what I have not been able to grasp. They had another person, I couldn't have another partner. I was physically unable, the little twinks are always smart and jocks are always meat heads, what intelligent little guy would want a dumb oaf like me?

I rolled my eyes, Alec my first boyfriend told me something like that when we broke up. I had quite a few discrete relationships. I was too dumb, I was too possessive, and then I was too closed off. After that I had decided to screw relationships, I was always dumped and I was the only one getting hurt, I was sick of it.

So here I am now at a bar every weekend trying to find a guy that wants to jump into bed with me with no attachments, and if he wanted a ride next weekend I would be there.

I looked away from the dance floor and over at the tables. I saw Danny in a booth and quickly ordered an apple martini for him. I walked on over to him and tapped his shoulder.

"JAY!" he yelled in a high pitch voice, before he jumped up and hugged me.

"Hey sweetheart, how are you?" I asked as I gave him the drink, Danny was my best and only gay friend and my confident, I could tell him anything. He was short 5'5" with black hair he kept in a scene style I think is what he called it. He had a cute face and was a hyper, skinny, little guy. He looked so deflated when I sat down next to him in the booth.

He frowned "John broke up with me Monday," he sighed raggedly and I put my arm around him to comfort him. Danny was a lot stronger than me, he would try over and over to find the guy for him, no matter the heart break. "I think I should just start dating you, Jay, you know how to protect me, I know you would never hurt me,"

He was referring to the time that he had been beaten up near the bar by some homophobes. I stumbled upon them and beat the shit of if the three of them, and helped Danny get some medical attention. Since then we have been friends and at times Danny would stay at my house with me. "I don't date Danny or I would take you up on that offer,"

Danny pouted giving me the puppy face, "you think that I would hurt you?!"

"I didn't meant that sweetheart, remember I'm the dumb, possessive, self-centered, closed off, meathead jock," I smiled at him ruffling his hair.

Danny swatted my hand away. "Stop that! It takes me forever to get my hair like this, and you need to quit thinking of yourself like that,"

"You ought to quit using so much gel, you look better without it anyways,"

"My hair is fine, what do you know of fashion? Now stop getting me off topic,"

"I'm not getting you off topic, you just proved my point of me being a dumb jock, I know nothing of fashion, and I want what I like, dumb and self-centered jock,"

"Jaaaaaay!" he pouted.

"Don't worry about me, sweetheart, I will be ok and you will find the guy for you, and I will always be here for you, ok? Besides I have to make sure your boyfriend knows that if he hurts you that I will beat his ass,"

"You are too hard on yourself, Jay,"

"Well there's another thing to add into the 'things that make me unqualifiedly datable' list, oh and the fact that I hide behind a 'girlfriend' so I'm not scrutinized, that's a big one,"

"You will find someone one day Jay," Danny said chugging the martini.

**********

"Good God! Danny how much did you drink?"

"The whole bottle?" he said giggling and leaning on me as I opened my door. I carried him inside, kicked the front door closed and walked into the guest room laying him on the bed. He giggled again and then started rolling on the bed, I rolled my eyes.

"I doubt that, it was probably more like a gallon" I took off his shoes and socks and his jeans. He had stopped rolling and I helped him to sit up lean against my chest, to pull off his shirt. Then I started turning the covers down. When I looked at him again he was asleep. I placed him thin the bed and covered him up then kissed his head. "You are going to wake up with one hell of a headache tomorrow, sweetheart,"

**********

A shrilly sound woke me up the next morning, it was my cell phone going off. "Hello?" I asked groggily.

"Jason?" Sara asked "are you asleep?"

"I answered the phone didn't I?" she didn't respond, and left an awkward silence "what's up, Sara?"

"Um well I-I have to talk to you Jason, can I come over?"

I looked at the clock, it was ten thirty. I sighed, "yeah sure come on over," I got up and threw on the pants I wore last night and then went to brush my teeth and use the bathroom. I went into the kitchen and started to make some coffee, when there was a knock on the door. When I opened it Sara came in, she stood awkwardly in the living room twisting her fingers together.

"What's up Sara?" I knew her enough that when she was nervous she tended to be erratic.

"imsoryJasonbutI'mbreakingupwithyou," she said it so quick I couldn't understand her.

"Huh?"

She took a deep breath, "I'm sorry," she paused and bit her lip, "I am breaking up with you," she looked down at the floor.

"Oh, why?" it hurt me, I was the one that made breakups. When someone broke up with me it was always because of something I did.

"Because, you don't deserve me," she paused again, making me nervous, "I made a bet with my friend that I could get in bed with you,"

"Oh," I stood there dumbfounded. Not sure what my reaction should be. This was new territory for me.

"I know it was wrong and that's why I'm breaking up with you now,"

"Alright, um thanks for being honest with me," I said placing my hand on her shoulder. She looked up at me and smiled.

"JAAAAAAAY!" Danny yelled. I closed my eyes took in a deep breath. I looked at Sara who looked at me with accusing eyes.

"You cheated on me?!"

I looked down at her and raised an eyebrow. "that's Danny, he's in my guest room because he was wasted last night and I wouldn't let him drive,"

"Oh, oops, sorry, I uh, I will just leave then," she quickly ran out the door. I nodded my head and then went to check on the groaning mass in my guest room that calls itself a human. Personally I think it's a drunken fairy.

**********

The next week was rather dull for me, I hung out at Danny's a little trying to bring up his spirits and trying to get him to lay off the drinks. The little alky could drink a ton! I was a little worried for him, but he always seemed to jump right back. I thought it would be a matter of time before he was out hitting the bars again looking for his new love.

"What's up with you? It looks like someone spat in your cereal," I heard Chris whisper next to me.

"Huh? ...oh my friend, he is going through a rough break up, I'm a little worried about him, but he always seems to bounce back," I shrugged. I lay on the desk looking pitiful most likely and ignoring the lecture of the day.

"Sorry to hear that, what happened?" he looked generally concerned, I imaged it was for me, but I know that's just how Chris is, always concerned for the welfare of others.

"He was too possessive and too analytical over him," it didn't register to me that I let it slip.

"He?"

"Huh? Oh my bad I mean she," I was stammering but I made the quick fix. Shrugging his shoulders Chris just went back to watching Mr. Garner talk.

"I heard what happened to you too," he wasn't looking at me as he said it he was just staring straight ahead, and his face was hidden behind a blank mask. I didn't like it, he looked to serious.

"What are you talking about?" I asked fiddling with my pen.

"About Sara, she dumped you didn't she, or is that just a rumor?" he still hadn't lost that seriousness, his whole body became stiff to I noticed.

"Oh!" I closed my eyes and sighed, leaning back up into my chair. "Nah, that's true, mutual disagreement I would say,"

"Well um, I don't want to sound all sappy or anything..." he was blushing and scratching his head, trying to look at anything other than me, "I mean... I'm here for you if you need anything, or whatever you know?"

I smiled, genially pleased someone was looking out for me. "That's great thanks, but I'm good I'm not broken up over it," I noticed he looked at me quizzically. "What?"

"You have been dating her over five months, normally that means you are in a serious relationship," he was finally looking at me again, and I got a thrill from it.

"Oh, well, nah, we weren't that serious,"

I noticed out of the corner of my eye that he was staring at me oddly. I fidgeted in my seat from the undesirable glare. When he finally relented and looked back up to the teacher, I released the breath I didn't know that I was holding.

Mr. Garner finished early and gave us an assignment for the weekend, I moped not wanting to do anything but relax at my apartment. I knew that wasn't going to happen anyways. Danny had begged me to go to the bar with him so that he would feel confident when he was there. I agreed then told the brat that he owed me big for taking up three of my weekends.

Chris was packing his things away when my cell went off. I reached over and answered it. It was Danny, he wanted to grab lunch with me.

"You're paying," I said mock annoyed.

"To use you shamelessly in bed?! DEAL!"

"Hey I'm not a prostitute!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm positive, where we meeting at?"

"Umm, Subway's!" he said so enthusiastically I could picture him jumping in the air with one hand raised high and a huge grin on his face. He was coming back around.

"Ok then I will see you soon," I was smiling when I flipped the phone closed.

"Who was that?" Chris asked with a smile.

"My friend, Danny, he was the one going through the rough break up," his mouth dropped open and he looked at me stunned. I didn't know what was going on until I thought bout to the conversation with Danny, no wonder he was looking at me funny.

"Um he was being stupid, don't worry I don't sell my body, he was just being funny. We are meeting for lunch,"

He nodded "oh ok," he smiled and then left.

I felt like he had just abandoned me, that was a punch in the stomach. He looked horrified at the thought of me being gay. I knew he could never find out and I also knew that now my chances with him were fully out the window. I sighed defeated and trudged to Subway's. Danny's good mood would make me feel better, well that and the alcohol that I was going to drown myself in tonight.

Danny noticed my deflated mood and tried getting me to fess up to what was wrong but I didn't. I could bear the pain, I repeated over and over in my head. I can come out of this, I thought.

**********

When we entered the bar the loud thrumming of the amps playing music jolted my body. Danny grabbed us a booth and ordered us some drinks. He looked at the crowd and smiled at me.

"Looks like a good night huh?" he said enthusiastically. He was infectious and his mood and outlook made me smile. I nodded and he searched through the crowd. "What happened?" Danny asked looked at me like I was so fragile.

"Nothing, Danny, don't worry about it," I smiled tightly "I'm here tonight to protect you, make you confident and hopefully get so wasted or get lucky,"

"You want to go home? I don't mind, I-," he stammered.

I shushed him with one finger on his lips, "either way I'm getting wasted, I do it here I might get lucky too, besides I made a promise to you, sweet cheeks,"

He nodded slightly, I know he still felt bad but he didn't say anymore. I watched Danny a little before I started to throw back the beers, I needed to make sure he was ok first. I had told him that I would be fine alone that I just wanted to drink. After trying to dig for answers one last time Danny relented, and went to the dance floor. He was walking around now and I notice a guy grab his wrist. I lifted my head from my hand I had been resting it against and watched, I knew Danny would signal me if he felt unsafe. This time he didn't though, a smile lit up his face as the man walked him to the edge of the dance floor and stayed to sway. I took a swig of the beer in my other hand.

"Like that guy a lot, huh?" I voice ask me. I looked over and saw a small guy sliding into the booth across the seat opposite of mine. He was a blond twink with electric blue highlights and matching blue eyes.

"watching over him, he's basically my lil' brother," I said I watched as the guy across from me extended his hand.

"Aaron," he smiled.

"Jason, you can call me Jay," looks like I was getting lucky, I thought to myself.

"Who aren't you getting, Jay?"

That had shocked me, "W-what?"

"Oh, come on, I can see it in your body language and in your eyes, you lost some one," He said looking me straight in the eyes.

"I lost something I never could obtain," Was all I said.

"I can help you forget about it," He smiled scooting closer to me. I made a quick check of Danny, who was still having a good time with the other guy. I felt Aaron's hot breath on my neck next and I moaned. I quickly and roughly started kissing him, and pushed him to lie down on the bench of the booth. Soft mewls coming from his throat as I sucked on his ear.

I pictured his tall, hard body on the bed in front of me those grey eyes staring at me begging me to fuck him and have my way with him. That slightly long, pure blond hair, mussed up in every direction. His hands coming up behind my head as he softly whispered for me to kiss him again.

I opened my eyes and saw blue eyes staring at me glazed with lust. Aaron, I was with Aaron, I wasn't with Chris. I sighed and stopped kissing him, this wasn't fair for Aaron. I sat up and looked at Aaron. I shook my head slowly, "I'm sorry, this isn't fair on you, I-,"

"Thinking of him not me?" Aaron surprised me by smiling. I nodded slowly feeling ashamed. "That's, ok, Jay, it will take some time for you to get over it," He patted my shoulder and then poked my neck. "Hope you don't mind," He said a little shyly.

"A hickey?"

"Or more," His smile grew. I laughed and nodded. Aaron went on and found some other lucky bastard.

A little while later I was sitting at the booth looking down at my third beer playing with the label. I thought of that little twerp, I repeated the mantra of I can get through this, I can bear the pain.

Danny came bouncing over to me then he plopped down next to me, "Getting lucky tonight?" I shook my head on top of my folded arms. He sighed.

"Who's the guy?" I asked looking at him and nodding towards the dance floor.

"Cameron, he is nice," Danny said simply. "He had to go to the bathroom, he will be back," I think he said that to not only reassure me but also himself.

"Who is this, Daniel?" Cameron had asked looking down at me. I noticed Danny grimace, he didn't like being called by his full name much, and I didn't mention it.