== VORTEX QUEST 1-10 ==
== THE VAULT 2: FUCKING VICTORY ==
The pantheon dropped down into a low chamber with a vaulted ceiling, filled with piles of obols, chests, weapons and strange artefacts. Torchlight flickered to life.
Marcus took a look into a crate atop a stack of gold bars. It seemed to contain bags of unicorn dust. His need for sex returned, impossible to ignore any longer. He wanted nothing *less* than ride a man's dick but he wanted nothing *more* than relief from horniness and the last time he had gotten anything of the sort...
"Don't touch anything," Chay said. "There's curses on all the money, according to Hrailoth, but probably on other stuff, too."
"Uh," Marcus made. "Too late." He raised his little bag of glitter. "Not feeling cursed, yet. Can we take this?"
"Gonna get fucked in the ass?" Xane asked.
Marcus was going to retort, maybe even deck the asshole. But Xane deflated with a sigh.
"Fine," the Korean hunk said. "Not like I know a better way to get off. We were warned -- perverse and twisted desires. Somehow I thought that meant lots of chicks, cockteasing me."
"What happens in the abyss," Goro said, "stay in the abyss."
The three of them put their fists together. Chay stepped into their midst and added his fist. "Found the bitch, by the way," he said. "Right there."
Half of a donut-shaped stone, shimmering with orange runes, lay atop a pillar. Xane swiped it with his mage-hand to avoid traps. He'd been right to do so. Long needles dropped from the ceiling and hit the space around the pillar to kill, maim or at least trap any thief.
"Ha," the mage made and tossed the key stone at the leader. "Let's fucking go."
The demigods jumped out of the vault and Chay examined the key stone while Xane continued his job of cleaning them and their small, tight fundoshi.
Marcus realized he could unsoil himself with a gentle application of whitefire, pushing dirt, sweat and dried blood away.
"You carry it," Chay said and handed the item back to the muscle wizard. "Keep it secret."
Xane saluted and stuck the half-ring into his fundoshi pouch. He hit 'most muscular' and let an illusion seep from his clenched fists. The stone arc blended into his skin.
Marcus hid his unicorn dust bag in his own pouch. It made quite the bulge and poked over the edges but he could walk with his hands folded before his crotch.
"It was looking dicey," Marcus said, "but we made it go smooth. I'm ready for a fuck, but I'll settle for a nap."
"Yeah," Chay said. "We're leav-"
An arrow zoomed past Marcus' and pierced the umbralist in the guts.
More Gawri streamed from the edges. Imps fluttered into the ceiling's proto-aurora in a panic.
Their leader dropped to the ground.
Goro rushed in, each fist punch a hammer blow that turned thrall heads to splatter. Xane blasted lightning at the ones with bows and arrows.
Marcus knelt next to Chay. He tried funneling some of his healing power through his hands but either that wasn't possible or his command of animus wasn't good enough.
"Didn't see that coming," Chay said. "How many are there?"
He tried to raise his head.
"Stay down," Marcus said. "The others can handle it."
"You should help out. I'll be fi- oh, hey Pie."
The nebulous feline dragged a still living imp in her mouth and pushed it into Chay's chest.
The umbralist puffed smoke at the pet. "You want me to eat that for strength, huh? Thanks, girl, but I'll be fine as soon as Xane get back to m- Hnggg, huh? Wh-wha-?"
"Chay? The fuck is happening?" Marcus asked.
"Pull it out," Chay said. "The arrow. Now."
"But..."
"Now."
Marcus grabbed the arrow. There was no arrow-head, it was a mere sharpened stick, so it came out cleanly but the wound began to bleed.
Then it closed.
Chay pet Pie between the cloudy ears. "You... sucked the life out of the imp for me, huh?"
The ugly flying creature stopped moving. Chay was healing fast.
"Wow," Marcus said. "Guess you got your own healing factor, at last."
"About fucking time," Chay said and rose. "Now go kill some... oh, they're all dead." He examined his quickly fading arrow scar. "Good job boys. Time to go."
===***===
Escaping the Troll cave was just a matter of walking out and saying bye to the overseer. Nobody looked too close.
At the exit however, the pantheon faced an issue. What to do with the dead Hellions?
Xane stayed at the entrance, trying to get the soul gem running again with the rest of Hrailoth's blood.
The others dragged the Hellions down the creak.
Freshly drenched in ectoplasm from stepping through the falls, Marcus fingers glowed with animus magic to keep a firm grip on the slippery armored corpse's shoulders.
"The next watch will realize they're missing," Chay said, carrying the legs. "But if they're not obviously fucking slain I hope Rvebnar won't bother checking his vault immediately. Hrailoth seems to think a few dead Hellions won't raise heckles but demon lords are arrogant as fuck so I don't trust what that shitbag says."