Here is the final chapter. I hope everyone has enjoyed reading about Pen and Ryan, and that the conclusion isn't a disappointment.
I want to thank you all for your comments, your encouragement has been wonderful. I hope to get lots more comments now that the story is finished, along with your votes, to let me know what you think.
Other ideas are brewing in my head, and I hope to get them written in the near future.
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Penlan slammed the door to the duplex behind him, glad that Mr. and Mrs. Casher next door had left earlier in the week for a two-week trip to Europe. Other than that action, however, nobody would guess there was anything wrong from his expression. Inside, ah, inside he felt like he was shaking apart.
The past six months with Ryan were the happiest of his life. He learned to smile and laugh from happiness, rather than as an appropriate response to what happened around him. He remembered two weeks ago, as he tried to explain to Ryan how he felt. "It's as though I've been wrapped in a bubble of darkness and now I'm finally walking in daylight."
Too soon. Pen knew he had spoken too soon. He should have known better than to let his guard down. He did know better but chose to ignore that knowledge. Now that bubble was back and the darkness was deeper and more suffocating than ever before. The worst part was how familiar the darkness was; how it almost welcomed him back like a long-lost friend. 'You're back now,' it seemed to say, 'back where you belong.'
Pen pushed himself away from the door. There were things to do and he needed to get them done right away. No point in delaying the inevitable. He moved towards the bedroom, stopping only for a moment at the hall closet to grab a box. Everything he could find that belonged to Ryan he tossed into the box. There wasn't much, since Ryan never spent the night, but there were some items scattered around the apartment. Since there wasn't much in the box, Pen went ahead and put in those things Ryan gave him during their time together.
Next, Pen fetched the trash bin from the bathroom and tossed the scented candles, test kit and lube he'd bought, since his plan was to finally seduce Ryan tonight. What a fool he'd been, grinning and humming as he set things up to be 'perfect'.
Pen then found his old suitcases and packed a week's worth of clothing, his toiletries, and a couple of books. He added the emergency cash he kept in the apartment and carried the bags to the entrance. All he needed to do now was to call a cab and toss the box of Ryan's belongings out on the front step. He considered leaving a note and then decided against it. A simple 'Leave your key' scrawled on the box was good enough.
Pen decided he needed to keep himself occupied while he was away and grabbed at an envelope from the hall table where he customarily threw the mail before reading it. He remembered a letter coming from MedLabs, and knew it contained a listing of upcoming clinical trials. Ryan had asked that Pen no longer participate and Pen had given in. Even though the infection at the injection sites was a completely random event, Pen figured he could give up the extra cash to make Ryan happy. Now there was no reason not to pick one and go. He took the pamphlet only and left the rest on the table.
At last the cab arrived out front and the driver honked.
Finally,
Pen thought as he hurried out, unable to bear staying any longer. "Where ya headed, kid?"
"Take me to the Bank Street Hotel."
The ride to the hotel passed in silence as Pen fought against the memories of his earlier encounter with Ryan. He would not think of it now. Those thoughts would have to wait until he was alone and did not have to hide any possible reaction. Pen didn't think he would cry, after all he hadn't cried since he was a child, but he couldn't take that chance. He'd forgotten himself enough to allow laughter and that was bad enough.
They reached their destination and Pen paid the driver and walked slowly to the main entrance. His reflection was clear and he felt nothing but loathing at the sight. The short, pale blond hair now reached his shoulders, but the curls were still too noticeable. They made him look almost cute. Coupled with his small stature and delicate features, Pen saw that he looked like nothing more than a child and he abruptly turned away.
On the off chance, slim as it was, that Ryan might look for him, Pen decided that he would not stay here. He skirted the building and made his way towards another hotel a few blocks away. On the way, he stopped to purchase a few supplies he thought might come in handy. The registry showed the name Sam Pritchard, which was his middle name and his mother's maiden name. Both were on his documents, but anyone searching would overlook them.
If he was going to relive the earlier events with Ryan, and Pen knew he would if only to reinforce the truth that he only got what he deserved, Pen decided to be fortified. A tall glass of rum and coke would help him, and it could be replenished until the bottle emptied. It couldn't make things easier, but damn it, he wanted it. He kept the memories that threatened to burst at bay until the glass was empty and a new one poured, and then he closed his eyes to relive his folly...
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Pen set down the last scented candle and took in his preparations. Satin sheets would be nice, but he didn't have any. Tomorrow he would go buy some. Still, the bed looked lovely with the new pillows scattered around the surface. He'd rearranged the furniture and he thought it looked wonderful. The softest, fluffiest towels he owned were in the bathroom, ready to use after a shower. Hopefully a shower shared with the man he loved.
The ringing telephone jolted him out of his pleasant fantasy. He hurried to answer and smiled in delight when it proved to be Ryan. "Hi! This is a wonderful surprise; I wasn't expecting you to call until much later."
"I called to see if you'd like to meet me for lunch in about an hour? We could go to, uh, 'Popular Eats', because I know you love their fries."
"Lunch with you would be awesome," Pen said, so happy he could burst.
