The big 21. It's supposed to be a grand event. You're supposed to go out with your friends, get absolutely wasted, flaunt your brand new I.D., and regret everything the next morning. Personally, I was looking forward to it.
My experience was not going as planned though. My friend cancelled on me last minute due to some other thing coming up in her life. I tried to listen to her excuse, but it really just went in one ear and out the other. It didn't matter why.
After a while of debating on what I should do, I decided to go out anyways and at least try to enjoy myself. Not everyone gets their 21st birthday on a Friday after all. I found myself at the first gay bar that popped up in my search. It was a drag bar not too far from my apartment. I'd been there for a while, had a few drinks, but without a friend there with me, I didn't feel the urge to get super drunk. I suppose that's not a terrible thing though. I'll at least be functional the next morning for work.
I think the most memorable part of the night was when I spoke with the host of the show, and when she found out that it was my birthday, she had the whole crowd of drunks sing me happy birthday. She forgot to ask my name though, so when they got to that part of the song, instead of singing 'Bobby,' the whole place just slurred the notes. It was extra funny considering I had a drink or two in me already.
This was also the first drag show that I had ever been to. We didn't have anything like that back home. I was still fairly new to the LGBT+ community as well as the big city. Everything had been an adventure the last few months. Life was complicated, but watching drag queens lip sync and do death drops made me forget for a little while.
"These bitches be crazy," the host commented as one performer left the stage with a bra full of cash, a wig in hand, and next to nothing on her body. She turned and winked to the crowd before disappearing behind the curtain. I giggled as the warmth from my drink overtook my body. I took another sip to find that I was empty.
'One more won't hurt,' I reasoned with myself. I pulled myself out of my seat and strolled over to the bar. It was pretty crowded, which wasn't surprising considering it was a Friday night in New York City. I squeezed into an empty spot and caught the attention of the bartender. He was cute. Wind blown hair, sparkling eyes, and an award-winning smile.
"This one's on the house, birthday boy," he declared before I could even ask. My mouth curled into a grin as he started mixing my drink. I watched his biceps stretch his sleeves as he worked. The man was beautiful.
As I waited for my order, I turned around to people watch. There was more diversity in that room than there was in the entirety of my hometown. My eyes grazed over all of the possibilities. One guy walked by me and unapologetically checked me out. He was wearing these shorts that didn't quite contain his ass. It was a nice ass. He held eye contact with me and nodded towards the restroom. It took a moment for me to process his request, but once I did, I declined. He shrugged his shoulders and moved on.
I looked away, and not even ten seconds later did I see a really cute guy standing at a table nearby. He was the definition of a twink. Thinking about it, I could easily run into a porn star without even knowing it. The guy glanced over and saw me staring. I immediately blushed, using my body language to apologize for staring. He smiled though and waved with his fingers.
'I should go talk to him. I do need friends after all,' I thought to myself. Just as my brain sent the signal to my muscles to get up and go though, another guy, presumably his boyfriend, stepped closer to him and looked at me. He had the look of pure lust in his eyes. He looked from me to his boyfriend and back to me, and I could only assume that that meant they were looking for a threesome. The original guy I was looking at placed his hand on his boyfriend's chest and travelled down to his crotch. I sat back down.
Don't get me wrong. I do enjoy sex, and on occasion, I just want it to be quick like those guys. There was something about that night though. I didn't want to go home with a stranger. I just wanted to enjoy my birthday without any expectations.
"Here you go, birthday boy," the bartender said from behind me. I turned to see him place the colorful drink beside me. I flashed him a smile before taking it. Just as I mustered up the courage to talk to him, he walked off to attend another customer. I guess it was too busy for conversation. I sat at the bar and looked out again. I saw a couple of guys practically grinding up on each other. I saw one of them whisper into the other's ear, and they left.
There was a lot of eye candy walking around. I knew that if I ever needed a warm body for the night, I could come here. I'm sure it wouldn't be too hard to find a guy who's horny out of his mind. Having my own apartment in this city would also be a huge bonus. Almost everyone seems to have a roommate or four. Then, a gust of wind carried the scent of lavender by. It caught my nose, and I took in a deep breath. I had a particularly sensitive nose, so I enjoyed nice smells. Just as soon as it had come, it had gone. I sighed.
"Is sex all anybody wants?" I said out loud. I talked to myself every once in a while. It was just a habit I built up.
"Seems like it right? Nobody wants to go on an old fashioned date or be friends without the benefits," a man said from beside me. I looked over, surprised that someone heard me talking to myself. I took in his appearance. He was quite handsome. His haircut was sharp, his beard trimmed, and had smile lines all over his face. He had to be in his upper 30s if I were to guess.
"I haven't been here long at all, and I could've left with like 4 people already," I said casually.
"Well, you are a cutie," he commented, gesturing to my body. I was no model, but I knew that I was attractive. I lucked out in the gene pool, and I kept a regular workout routine.
"Thanks," I replied, returning my eyes to the crowd. A drag queen was performing her heart out to some ballad I had never heard.
"Where you from?" The man asked. I was surprised he was actually trying to make conversation, knowing that I didn't want to hookup.
"Kansas. Not too glamorous compared to this place," I replied. I took a drink.
"Oh wow. That's a big change. What made you move? If you don't mind me prying," he asked, then gestured towards the stage. "Besides the glamour?"
"It's complicated. Honestly, I'd rather not get into it tonight," I replied, trying to be polite.
"No problem. I get it."
"I'm Bobby, by the way," I said, turning to him. I held out my hand for a handshake, and he took it.
"John," he replied with a smile. His grip was firm. The vibes I got from this guy were nice. Something about him just made me want to know more.
"Maybe we could talk about it another time. Over coffee or something?" I asked timidly. I didn't want to be too forward, but I also wanted him to know that I was interested.
"We could, but you should know that I'm married," he responded, flashing his ring at me.
'Figures,' I thought.
"Oh cool! I could use some friends," I confessed.
The night went on without much changing. I got hit on a couple more times by guys who were too drunk to stand still. I didn't even need to turn one guy down. He said hi to me, and then, he got distracted by the guy whose ass was hanging out and left without a word. It didn't hurt my feelings though. In fact, it was kind of a relief. I was getting tired anyways. I checked my phone to see that it was only 12:15.
'I'm getting old,' I thought to myself as I made the decision to leave. I downed the last bit of my drink and looked to see that the bartender was busy. I left him a tip. Maybe I'd come back to talk to him on a slower night. He seemed nice. Or maybe that was just his work face. Who knew. As I left, the host of the show and a performer were bickering. Everyone was laughing, and nobody noticed as I left.
'Not my birthday anymore. Back to regular life I guess,' I thought. I pulled my jacket closed as the frigid air hit me. I saw my breath as I looked around. I was really confused for a moment. I was still adjusting to the fact that I had moved to the city. My brain had to take a moment to register where I lived. I'm sure the alcohol didn't help me any.
"Damn. You've gotta have the best ass I've seen all night," someone said from behind me. I turned my head to see a couple old men leaning against the wall. They were smoking and were clearly intoxicated. I was dumbfounded. Nobody had ever cat called me before. It was really uncomfortable, so I turned to away.