After 7 years of being a caregiver, I was sad but wiser when cancer finally stole the great love of my life. I was 62, widowed and an empty nester. Time was my friend, I was free of chemo, doctor's visits, and hospice. It was time to mourn, and then it was time to move forward, to live. No disrespect but I had 7 years to prepare for this day, anticipatory grief is, after all, still grief. I bought a new car, went to Europe where I cried in some churches. I came home ready to look forward, to continue my life story.
Make no mistake, I loved my wife and we were good together, but every once in a while I needed something I couldn't get at home. For all of my life this had always been my very private secret. I'm masculine, athletic and professional, you'd never know, no one would unless I happened to be giving him a blowjob. For 32 years my wife didn't even suspect that I occasionally loved to suck cock or even get laid.
Now that I was single, I could pursue actual normal relationships, I wasn't restricted to the occasional bath house visit or road trip hotel room hookup; I was free. I wasn't going to come out as gay, because I'm not, but I was now willing to see where life led.
I decided to live a more outgoing and normal life than I had when I was a husband; to be open to possibilities of all kinds. On Match I met a woman who was a good fit, she checked all of the boxes, and we began to date, oh yea- she didn't check that one box, she was not going to be someone who I'd be confessing my bi secrets to. Betsy and I were otherwise great together, especially in bed, and I found us doing things that I'd been wanting to do sexually for over 30 years. My wife was beautiful but sexually modest, and I found that my bi longings subsided somewhat since I was sexually satisfied with this beautiful and passionate new partner. Maybe that was the issue all along I tried to convince myself.
Betsy is real healthy and active and introduced me to tennis, and I liked that, in fact I became obsessed with the game, taking weekly lessons and practicing almost daily. I got in the best shape of my life, dropping weight and getting a nice flat stomach. She was good for me in so many ways.
One night at a local wine tasting we found ourselves sitting next to a younger, successful couple from our town. He was about 45, tall, dark and in great shape. His wife was a gorgeous blonde, I know, what would you expect in a story like this, but, I'm telling you, she was! We started chatting and it turns out that he is a former tennis pro and he started giving me some helpful tennis information between glasses of pinot noir.
I noticed that when I asked her a few questions directly he seemed protective of her, finishing her sentences as if he thought she needed a little help. Or maybe he was uncomfortable with other men talking to his beautiful wife. I used to be married to a beautiful woman, so I thought maybe he hadn't yet learned to enjoy the compliment of her getting attention. Either way, I made a note that he was protective and potentially jealous. And that she seemed a little uncomfortable when he finished her sentences.
We hit it off as couples and made a date to get together a few weeks later. Lisa was an interior designer for a home builder, Sam was a real estate investor. The 4 of us played tennis and had a lovely dinner, Betsy and I were happy to make new friends. Sam could have thumped us all in tennis, but he was kind, hitting right back to us instead of knocking us over with his shots and I told him how much I appreciated his kindness. He smiled a humble and boyish smile and suddenly I was smitten, I wondered what it would be like to be with him, would he be just as kind in bed? (Whoa, where did that come from?)
We didn't just end up in bed, it wasn't that easy, in real life it never is. They had kids and other friends and we had lives too and for the next few months we saw Sam and Lisa for tennis or dinner every so often, I felt like I was improving my game and I certainly enjoyed watching all 3 of these beautiful people move on the tennis court. For the first time in years there was laughter in my life again.
One night, when Betsy was out of the country on business I met Sam and Lisa for tennis and wine. I regaled them with the details of our recent vacation in Jamaica where we played tennis every morning and smoked Ganja every afternoon. Lisa laughed especially hard when I confessed to our little secret, our superpower is that Betsy and I get extremely horny when we smoked. We learned that together in Jamaica and we had a very busy vacation!
After much coaxing I told her about our beach front veranda and how I drove Betsy crazy with my fingers while people strolled by on the beach just below our second floor porch. "You're blushing," she said and... I was. Lisa was, well, sexy. She looked like a model, long blonde hair, big blue eyes and luscious lips, but I was able to put a block on that: I had a girlfriend and I was satisfied, so I could treat her more like a little sister than as the sex kitten I might have seen her as in my younger life. She liked that and I found myself confessing things to her that I would never confess to anyone else.
I genuinely enjoyed her company.
Sam, on the other hand was another story. Meeting him had somehow brought my secret side back to life within me, in the privacy of my own home I'd imagine what I'd do for him, what I'd let him do to me. I wanted his cock in my mouth, I wanted to have him be my lover, to fuck me like he fucked his wife. I'd lay in my bed and cum all over my chest while moaning his name, and licking my own cum wishing it was his. I was, shall we say, open to new possibilities. Little did I know, they were too!
"We have some ganja," Lisa said, and I said, "well you know what it does to me." Sam laughed and said, "We'll take our chances." We drove back to their house, their kids at Sam's mothers for the weekend and we sat on the screen porch and watched it rain, we passed the joint.
"You know, my roommate in college got me high and then she seduced me," Lisa laughed, "although I didn't need a lot of convincing." My jaw dropped, "Oh look, you are blushing again!"
"She was great, I learned a lot about myself, and about intimacy with her."
"Do you miss her?"
"No, I have Sam, he takes care of me, but I try to tell him that he is missing something in his life, he says he's never dabbled with a man."
"NO, no I haven't." Well, this was my chance, I took a deep breath, maybe it was the pot and I confessed: "Well, I have."
It was Sam's turn to drop his jaw and blush. He was speechless, but not quiet little Lisa. "Details, details! Nothing gets Sam hotter than my stories, let's hear about yours!"
"Oh, I don't know if I want to give details," I demurred, suddenly bashful.
Lisa looked at me and smiled, "I think it is so hot that you've played with men. I think you are very distinguished and sexy as hell, and the thought of you, well, sucking a cock... Wait did you?"
"Well, yes, I have. I find that with a woman I am very masculine and strong but with a man I like to be a little more passive..."
