"Mom, we have to go!"
Alice sighed and grabbed the last handful of socks. She wrenched her husband Ben's drawer open and stuffed the socks in. Of course it wouldn't shut. Trying to contain her impatience, she pushed some of Ben's underwear out of the way to make room. Her hand touched something and she froze. Slowly she pulled what felt like lacy fabric out from underneath Ben's underwear, although there was no real need to look at it; she knew the feel. Nevertheless, she pulled out the flimsy red chemise. Her throat felt constricted and her mouth had suddenly gone dry. What was Ben doing with ladies lingerie in his underwear drawer?
"Mom!" Daisy shouted from the hallway, her face pinched with worry. "I'm going to be late."
Alice shoved the chemise back in the drawer, underneath the underwear. She took a deep breath and plastered a smile on her face before returning to her daughter.
"Coming, sweetie. Why don't you put on your coat and then we can go."
Alice's heart raced and she felt lightheaded. She never thought Ben would be the type to cheat on her, but what other explanation was there for that lacy piece of nothingness? She pushed the thought away. Now was not the time to think about this. She needed to get Daisy and Sarah to school. After that she could dwell on the unpleasantness of her discovery.
The drive to school was quick and uneventful. If her daughters noticed her mood, they didn't comment on it. Alice tried not to let despair overtake her, but it was only by sheer force of will that she kept the panic at bay. As luck would have it, she got caught up in traffic on her way back from the elementary school. Which gave her plenty of time to let her mind dwell on what she could scarcely believe.
How could Ben cheat on her? She tried to think whether she had missed some obvious signals. Ben worked a lot, sure, but there were no suspicious late night meetings. None that she had thought suspicious anyway. There were also no mysterious calls to the house, or to Ben's cell phone as far as she had noticed. But would she have noticed? They had both been so busy the last few years. Ever since both girls had started school, they were constantly driving one or the other to music practice or ballet or soccer. Ben did work a lot, and when he got home he was always tired. And if Alice was honest with herself, sex had not really been on the agenda much lately.
Come to think of it, when had they last had sex? It was before Carrie and Jane's anniversary party, which was at least a few weeks ago. Surely not longer than that? Alice tried to think back and found to her horror that it had, in fact, been four months. Her heart sank further into her stomach and she felt like she was going to be sick. How could four months go by without sex? She used to love dressing up for Ben, performing a seductive strip tease and driving him wild. She couldn't remember the last time they had actually put any effort towards their sex life. The last time had been a quickie; they had both been tired but had wanted to take advantage of the fact that the kids weren't home.
Alice turned into the driveway and stopped the car. Was it really any wonder that Ben had started to look for some excitement elsewhere? He could have told her he was dissatisfied. She would have understood and made more of an effort. It wasn't like Ben had initiated sex, either. She shook her head. No, it was not her fault that Ben cheated on her. She was not going to give him that excuse.
With a heavy heart she pulled out her phone. She would have to get her sister Sophie to look after the kids tonight. She would need to confront Ben and she didn't want to do that when the kids were present. The fall out would be hard enough for them, she didn't want them to witness the initial confrontation.
Sophie picked up on the first ring. "Alice, long time..."
Alice forced her voice to be cheerful. "Sorry, Sophie, I know. I have a favour to ask. Would you be able to have the kids over tonight?"
Sophie laughed. "Sure, why not. Bit last minute though, do you and Ben have exciting plans?"
Alice winced at the innuendo in Sophie's words. "Something like that. Look, can I drop them off right after school?"
"No problem. Have fun."
With a heavy heart Alice disconnected the call and left the car.
***
Alice busied herself and packed the girls' bags. She placed their bags by the front door and headed back to the threshold of their marital bedroom. Taking a deep breath, she entered and opened the offending drawer. The red lace was peeking out from underneath her husband's underwear and with a sickening feeling in her stomach, she picked it up. She held it out as if it was contaminated and scrutinised the flimsy material. It was a beautiful garment, something that Ben would have picked out for her years ago when they still played dress up in the bedroom. Come to think if it, it was very similar to one Ben had given her ages ago. Alice could feel the bile rise in her throat. How dare he buy a similar chemise for his lover?
She threw the lingerie on the bed and opened her own underwear drawer. She just wanted to compare the two, see whether Ben had bought his lover a nicer, better quality one. She opened the silk box where the similar one was kept and gasped. It was empty. Her scalp pricked and hope started to dawn in her heart. She picked up the red chemise again and turned it over in her hands. She put it to her nose and inhaled the familiar scent of her own perfume.
Relief washed over her like a tidal wave. She didn't know whether to laugh or cry and in the end she did both. Ben wasn't cheating on her, he had stolen her lingerie for himself. She didn't want to dwell on the reasons why he had shoved it so unceremoniously in his own underwear drawer; it didn't matter. She had been right about him: he hadn't cheated on her. She reached for her phone to call Sophie to cancel the kids' sleepover, but stopped just in time. She could make use of the kid-free evening and make it a special one. She could dress up like old times and give Ben an evening to remember. Her pulse quickened and she felt something she hadn't felt in a long time: excitement.
***
The kids were all too happy for a sleepover at Aunt Sophie's place. Sophie winked at Alice when she dropped the kids off, and Alice grinned back. Now that the issue of the chemise had been cleared up, she felt like she was walking on a cloud. It didn't bother her at all that Sophie knew exactly what she was planning tonight.
