Chapter one -- Ben
Ben always considered himself to be the normal guy, at twenty-seven he had completed college, been married for five years to the love of his life Marilyn and had worked his way up to a middle management position leading an IT group at the software company he worked. From the outside Ben's life was fantastic, he and his wife both had good jobs, owned their home, had nice cars and took nice vacations. Anyone looking on them, especially at their age, was jealous of what they had built through their hard work.
While all of those looking in saw the fantastic things about the marriage, as with any relationship things were not always as they seem. Ben struggled with a great sense of longing on a daily basis, he had a great marriage to a woman that he loved more than anything, yet he felt unfulfilled, incomplete. While he had no doubt how much Marilyn had loved him and how much he loved her, he couldn't help but wonder if she was ever going to be the woman that he wanted/needed sexually.
Ben had grown up to think of sex as something that was to be enjoyed, experimented with and to not shy away from. Neither of his parents was overly open with him; however he had grown up at the early age of internet porn and had also found his father's pornos at a very young age. Looking back on it he tends to wonder if his early introduction to sex was not a bad thing, but it was the only thing that he knew and led to him having many fantasies, which he always expected were only a matter of time until he experienced.
During his college days Ben found himself with several opportunities to engage in some of his fantasies, but that was not good enough for Ben. Ben had always expected that he would not only experience these fantasies, but do so with someone that he loved and the girls that he was with in college just did not qualify, that is until he met Marilyn. She was the most beautiful woman that he had ever seen and he knew when he met her that she was going to be the woman that he wanted to be with and the one that he wanted to experience and share not only his life but his fantasies.
When Ben and Marilyn had first started dating experiencing his fantasies was not his primary concern, given that he knew he half of the equation had been met as he had found the woman he wanted to be with. During their yearlong courtship, several nights were orgasmic for both Ben and Marilyn, and Ben was certain enough that Marilyn was who he had dreamed about all of these years that he asked her to marry him. Marilyn of course happily accepted and they set the date for nine months later.
Almost immediately Ben had noticed a difference in Marilyn, he was not sure what it was, but he wrote it off as the stress of being a senior in college as well as planning a wedding. Thinking back this time should have been an obvious red flag for Ben that something was different that the love life he had come to enjoy was going to change forever; but alas Ben was in love and excited about beginning his life with Marilyn. He figured that this would just be a fad that she was going through and that once she was married they were would be able to explore their dreams and desires as they wished.
Unfortunately for Ben, Marilyn's change in the lead up to the wedding was less of a change and more of who she actually was. It became obvious that during their initial courtship Marilyn had stepped outside of her comfort zone. Whether she had done this in an effort to woo Ben or simply out of college experimentation was irrelevant to Ben he knew very early in his marriage that the chances he did not take in college would come back to haunt him, thoughts that just killed him to think. Ben hated to think about anyone other than his wife or that he had made a bad decision because no matter how bad his sex life was he never felt that he had made the wrong decision.
As the first few years of their marriage drug on not only did the lack of experimentation cause strains in their marriage, but eventually the overall frequency of sex came to cause major issues. For a long time Ben was masturbating more than he was making love to his wife, a fact that not only brought great discomfort to him, but also to Marilyn. Ben had gotten to the point that he was tired of being rejected when asking for sex, so he found it easier to just masturbate before Marilyn got home from work, as Ben usually beat her home. This was generally not a big deal as Marilyn really did not have the need or desire to have sex on a regular basis and was only an issue on the few occasions that Marilyn was actually horny.
During the rare occasions that Marilyn wanted to have sex it was always the same, it was predictable to the point that it really was not exciting for Ben anymore. It would start with Marilyn on top riding him. While Ben would play with her ample breasts, Marilyn would grab the one toy (out of seven or eight that Ben had gotten her) that she actually liked and would use that on her clit until she got off. Once she got off she would want Ben to finish her off while in the doggie style position. While this may not sound all that boring, in fact to many people that would probably be an exciting night of sex, the fact that it was the same thing that they did each and every time, with very little exception, made it routine and ultimately boring to Ben.
After five years, Ben was at a loss as to his options, rather which option to take. The way Ben figured he had three options: he could sit and hope that Marilyn will eventually change and become more adventurous and open minded, he could leave Marilyn and find someone who was more in line with his beliefs when it comes to sexual relationships or he could just ignore the sexual problems and focus on all of the positives of the marriage. Obviously Ben would prefer the first option, although that he the least likely chances of actually occurring, finally Ben decided that the latter option would be the best as he truly did love Marilyn and decided that nothing was more important than his love for her.
