I'm (Brad) the "cucky" member of a Stag/Vixen relationship. Vixen (Josie) and I "live the lifestyle" as much as we can and we are full players in what we do...she fucks the BBC she wants (alone or with me), and then I fuck her.
The CuckyStag angst series is completely true. 100% facts. I am going to tell the story, experiences, and most importantly the feelings from my (Brad) point of view because I cannot tell you exactly what happened from Josie's point of view at every moment...because I wasn't there. But Josie tells me everything she can remember about her playtime. We like it that way. Josie playing out on her own with her bull(s) is something we're doing more of. The experience is MUCH more intense for both of us, both during and after the play. I will attempt to convey as much of my internal and physical feelings and reactions as possible. Believe me, they are intense, and I'll try my best.
Chapter 1: The King Arrives
With as many play partners Josie has across the country there is one bull in particular Josie enjoys playing with on her own. It's the chemistry they have which makes it work for us and for them. Also as time has gone on, King has found comfort and pleasure in having her to himself. It is very emotionally tense for me knowing the preferred meeting is without me there.
There were times while I was away on business Josie had opportunities to meet with King on her own. She always told me about it and "asked permission" because she likes the idea of my approval and encouragement--it's a mind-fuck for Josie when her husband gives permission to fuck black guys even though she knows she doesn't need "permission."
I started out wanting some sort of electronic participation during their meetings in the form of pictures or video. Like I said, the excitement while Josie is away with King is intense and I thought the pictures and short videos would ease my angst, and they did. But, they were usually poorly done, haphazard, mostly out of focus with no real thought to the angle or the lighting. But they were pictures none-the-less and they helped me through.
As time has passed and meetings have become more frequent, King has actively worked to reduce those pictures or videos. Josie told me he said, "If a husband wants me to fuck his wife, he just has to trust that I will fuck his wife."
That revelation came after a particularly intense and lonely wait I had while on business overseas and Josie was invited by King to attend an interracial fuck party in Dallas. During that meeting and since, my only relief has been to scroll back to the pictures on my phone which were sent from previous meetings. And think. And imagine. And try not to touch myself.
Josie and King met at Splash Mocha Fort Lauderdale in 2017. If you don't know of this event, it's a large interracial lifestyle party and hotel takeover. Essentially, it's white husbands accompanying their white wives for the sole purpose of fucking black men.
There is little if no white/white play like at a normal lifestyle party. Black and white everywhere. Tons of BBC to choose from. The event is exactly our style; sun, pool, music, nakedness, nighttime events, and literally hundreds of BBC for Josie to ogle and play with.
Josie loves the venue because, although she's fairly modest, she loves to be looked at while at the pool. She is a head turner. Long legs, tight tummy, beautiful face, long naturally wavy auburn hair, nipples that are always hard and perfect, and an ass which begs to be squeezed. You would be able to tell she's a classy lady even in a swimsuit. A classy lady who likes to fuck black men, and she gets plenty of attention at this event.
Josie had flirted and played and found herself many times in the arms of handsome black men. Sometimes it ended with the two between the sheets, sometimes it was just a fun 30 minutes feeling a cock press into her ass cheek in the pool. All while I watched.
It was the last morning of the event, everyone was waking up getting ready to check out of the hotel after a huge time over the long weekend. Josie made her way downstairs for a smoke (she doesn't anymore) on the back deck of the hotel overlooking the golf course. It was normal, I rolled over and shut my eyes and with any luck she would bring back coffee from the bar downstairs.
At about the time I expected her to walk into the room with coffee, I got a text from her number, "Your wife has incredibly sexy feet."
This was to be the very first time in our play I felt the "angst" I've heard so much about. This was that exact moment for the first time. Quite unexpectedly I physically got a tight chest, shortness of breath, a growing cock, and pre-cum. A lot of it. Pre-cum almost immediately started to ooze into a bead on the slit of my cock head and soon became a string reaching down to the bed sheets as I lay on my side.
Mentally I had an intense feeling of being left out. Up until this point I had never been left out of our play. I felt an overwhelming sense of wanting. I wanted to be there. I wanted to protect. I wanted to be a part. I wanted to know with my eyes and my ears. I wasn't getting the immediate gratification of being there.
We had always talked about Josie maybe playing alone for the sole purpose of causing this "angst" I had never felt before. We've tried, but it had always been planned while I was there. Josie once made me wait outside the bedroom while she fucked one of her men. It was a Sunday, and I watched football (kind of) while I listened to them fuck in the other room. That didn't elicit the same reaction from my mind and body because I could just get up and walk to the next room and listen. I at least had my ears involved and I could fill in gaps with my mind.
Then another text. "Her legs are amazing and smooth. And her lips..."
Her lips? Which lips? This man seems to be making his way up from Josie's feet to her legs, and now her lips? Oh my God. I was standing up from the bed now, as I figured this is no time to lay down. My thick and stringy pre-cum had made a string from my cock almost to the floor. My cock wanted to fuck. My body and mind needed relief.
You must understand, Josie has not been one to purposefully take off and fuck someone else outside of my sight and earshot. That's just the way we did it. This was very unusual. This man had to be special. Really. She must have been smitten. For Josie to give this man her phone so he could text her husband about her body was way outside of her norm. He had to be special but how would she know in that short of time? It had only been about 45 minutes.
I tried to calm myself. I tried to think through it in an effort get relief from my angst. We've read and talked about compersion. The idea that to truly submit as a cuckold the true cuck must submit to his partner and her true happiness. In the case of the cuckold, showing compersion means not undermining your partner's sexual desires and conquests.
The anxious cuck many times undermines the lady and her happiness, mainly by making the cuck experience about him. In that case, the man is not a true cuck...the man is trying to control the situation.
I really wanted to cum, but I was terribly afraid of the "post cum remorse" which we've also read plenty about. The idea that cuming will then take away the sexual tension needed for the "angst" to work. Part of me wanted the cum. Part of me knew not to cum because I LOVED the angst.
