It had been a lousy day that day anyway...so no reason to expect it would end any better, right? But I never in my wildest dreams expected the ending that really did happen. Thoughts of my former Master had been running through my head for weeks now, which was usually an indication that He was thinking of me too...but since we had split months ago...I dismissed those thoughts and just shoved them to the back of my mind...but the nagging thought was always there...what would I do if He would come back? How would I react? What would I say?
The ending was so abrupt with Him, only an e-mail telling me that He was leaving town and wouldn’t be back. I had never gotten any closure on it with Him...and it was totally unexpected. This man was my life... my world...and my world came crashing down around me with that single letter. But I picked myself up and carried on...the days seemed endless...and the nights even worse...my rock was gone...the one I clung to when the world around me was tossing me around like a leaf in the wind...the one whose strength I could always rely on...the one who could talk me out of any mood I was in and make my world bright and safe again...the one I loved more than life itself. Was if my fault He left? Did I cling too hard? Did I demand too much of Him as my Master? Was I not good enough? ...Obedient enough?...sexual enough?...surely it was my fault that He left.
Class had let out early that night...and I was in a bad mood anyway because I had to give a presentation on my final paper...which I thought I had done terribly ...all the things I should have said and done kept running through my mind as I drove home that night...and I was kicking myself for not doing better. I pulled into my driveway and wasn’t really paying attention too much...just was glad to be home and have the night behind me.
As I stepped out of the car I thought I saw the red glow of a cigarette at the steps of my house...but thought I was being crazy and paranoid...and then there He was...leaning against the banister of the porch...impeccably dressed as always...the moonlight playing on the soft ebony of His skin...my heart stopped and I know my eyes had to get wide as saucers...I was over this man now...why did He still have such an effect on me? I had moved on...was seeing another Dom...one that I was crazy about...and yet in that instant...when I saw Master Lee standing there...my world flip flopped again and I knew that I hadn’t really resolved all the issues of the break up.
"Hello baby, you’re looking beautiful as ever",...His voice was like a soothing balm to my soul...creeping into every crevice of my being...my nipples instantly hardened and I could feel the wetness in my panties...my body was betraying me...in spite of all that I had been through...all the pain and heartache...I still wanted and needed this man...I was speechless...when I finally found my voice I muttered a hello...my eyes never leaving His...searching them...looking for what I don’t know...He quickly came back with..."I can’t stay angel...I just wanted to let you know why I left...where I’ve been...and that I’m ok...my hands were shaking as I opened the door...and He followed me into the house...sitting in His favorite chair...the one that we had went out and bought together for Him when He was at my house...I just couldn’t get rid of it...I pulled the cushion out and sat next to Him at the foot of the chair...and slowly began to eat as His story unraveled...when I was done eating I got up...never asking permission...just doing it...and poured us both a glass of red wine...and continued to listen as He told me of His journeys overseas...how he had left everything behind...that He was working on a farm for the summer and was going back out of the country in the fall...my mind was spinning...why was He here?...all the emotions came flooding back in one fell swoop...I knew at that instant that I still loved Him...probably always would...and no matter who I was with...this man would always hold a piece of my heart that I would never be able to give to anyone else...
I kept refilling our wine glasses and by the time His story was finished we were both pretty relaxed ...and I was feeling more at ease being around Him again...I knew He still wanted me and loved me ...not only from the tenderness in His voice...but also from the bulge in His pants...the sexual tension was so thick you could have cut it with a knife...and I knew that even though I would never see this man again in my life...and that He meant every word He was saying to me...that I had to have Him one last time...
