I wondered sometimes how I'd gotten into this position. Not that I was complaining: I had an "essential" job, so even in the coronavirus era I was still getting a paycheck. But I was barely scraping by, and my effing landlord refused to cut us apartment dwellers a break.
My fellow tenants were also unhappy. Most of them no longer had jobs. With the country shutting down (it was the right thing to do, despite the wishes of the baboon masquerading as a President) and people going into seclusion, there wasn't much choice.
We had a tenants' meeting via Skype, and decided we were going to all not pay any rent until the country opened back up. We let the landlord know our decision.
He was not happy. That was mistake number one. He let us know about his unhappiness. That was mistake number two. He decided to come over in person to have it out with us.
As J. R. Capablanca once wrote, "Mistake number three, and this time fatal."
"Somehow", documents were found transferring the ownership of every apartment to the resident(s) who lived there. And the abandoned gravel pit makes a great place to hide things you DON'T want found... just saying.
The police never did find any actual evidence of anything.
I had played a key role, so the other residents were quite grateful. I'd been single and unattached for a while now and there was one I'd had my eye on for a while. She was also single and unattached.
I invited Gail over to celebrate our triumph.
"Thanks, Lyle. Since you're cooking, I'll let you know in advance my favorite food is pasta with white sauce."
"I'll bear that in mind."
Gail had been born here, but her parents were Jamaican. They had come here while her mother was pregnant with Gail and given their daughter an American name so she would "fit in". A reasonable thing to do, but of course Gail's skin color - quite dark, like with most Jamaicans - made her stand out from the crowd. Having spent all her life here, she had acquired our eating habits, and her figure - quite plump - reflected that. I happen to be physically attracted to both women with a few extra curves and women with dark skin, so of course I'd been crushing on Gail ever since she moved in.
"Do you have the ingredients?"
Gail was worried about me having to go out in public while this plague was still around. Luckily, pasta is also one of my favorite dishes and I prefer white sauces. And it was easy to get a couple months ago before people started panic-buying, it keeps quite well and it doesn't need to be refrigerated. Pasta was one thing I had plenty of.
"Yes, I do. Tonight, then?"
"Six o'clock."
"Deal."
I headed back inside and made preparations for my date. I showered, put on clean clothes, and cooked up a mess of pasta with a lovely alfredo sauce, with some vegetables on the side and a few pieces of chicken mixed in with the pasta for some protein.
Gail arrived, and I invited her in. She seemed impressed with my culinary efforts. There was water in the glasses and I'd used actual plates and silverware instead of paper plates and plastic forks.
"I hope this tastes as good as it looks and smells, Lyle."
"I hope so too, Gail."
We dug in and for the next five minutes the only sounds were that of us chewing. After our stomachs were no longer yawning pits, we stopped shoveling the food in and slowed our pace enough to actually speak in between bites.
"Thanks for the invite. Why did you specifically pick me?"
"Because I've had a crush on you for the past year and a half."
"Why didn't you say something before?"
"Fear of being rejected."
Gail gave me a sad smile. "I've been rejected about six times in that interval. People don't think a fat, dark-skinned woman who works in a nail salon is worth dating."
"I'm not exactly Chris Hemsworth, myself."
It was true. Like Gail, I was pushing 40, and I'd acquired a paunch. My short, straight brown hair was starting to recede, and I wasn't exactly athletic. Grocery store clerks tend not to be.
"But you're interested in me."
"Yes."
"That'll be enough, for the moment. I figure we should find out tonight if we're sexually compatible, and then if we are, gradually find out over the next few months if we're romantically compatible."
