Jealousy Explained

An insistent ray of sunlight poked me in the eye. I muttered and rolled over, burying my face in the satiny softness of the pillow. Automatically, I inhaled deeply, pulling the soothing scent of lavender deep into my lungs. The pounding in my head eased a bit and slowly thoughts filtered their way into my slushy brain.

First of all, I had no satin sheets. Secondly, they didn't smell of lavender. And, last but certainly not least, where exactly were my clothes?

I pushed myself up on my forearms and looked blearily around. I turned my head to the right and caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror that wasn't mine. My long hair was mussed, my eyes still looked sleepy, but overall I looked content and pleased. It was the expression I always had after a particularly good night of romping in the sheets.

I flipped on my back and stretched luxuriously, enjoying the exotic feel of the satin against my bare body. I could have purred, I was so satisfied. It took me a bit to realize I could hear the sounds of a shower and I sat up, dragging the sheets to my breasts. I heard the water stop and I re-arranged the sheets to show off a bit of leg for my host. Whoever that may be, I thought, suddenly realizing I had no idea at whose place I was.

The door to the bathroom opened and out stepped a vision. Long, reddish hair, soft blue eyes and killer body. She was beautiful.

SHE??

I gave out a yelp and pulled my leg back under the sheets. My mouth dropped open when I realized where I was. I had apparently gone home with Ariana, one of the newer girls in our group of friends.

We had been out celebrating Allen's divorce from that harpy of a wife of his. The drinks and laughter had flowed unabated and memories of the previous night came in flashes to me, like scenes from a movie. I remembered dancing with Allen (who I had had a serious crush on when we were kids, but now we were all in our early 40s and he didn't look anywhere near as cute), and doing shots with Arianna. I remember we all started dancing together at one point after all the liquor kicked in, but I didn't remember leaving with her.

"Morning, sleepy-head!" my hostess called out to me, obviously not suffering the same after-effects I was.

"Ummm...hey," I said, unsure of what else to say.

"Great night, huh?" she said teasingly, as she slipped on a t-shirt and shorts. She approached the bed, her hair still damp from the shower. She sat on the edge of the bed and tugged at the sheet that was currently covering me. "Why so shy all of a sudden?"

"Woah, hang on! Don't do that!" panic was evident in my voice as I clutched the sheets closer. What the heck had I done? Could I really have possibly slept with another woman? And one I barely knew, to top it all off.

"Why not? Not like I didn't see everything last night," she said, moving closer.

"Okay, now you're freaking me out. Just what exactly happened last night? And where are my clothes?" I said, scooting away from her.

She gave me a sly grin and started to crawl over the sheets toward me. She reached out a manicured fingernail to stroke my cheek and I became paralyzed. She burst out laughing at my expression.

"Oh, this is hysterical! Relax, Kayla, nothing happened! You were too drunk to drive home, so I brought you here. You took off your own clothes and passed out. You couldn't have done anything if you tried," she laughed, rocking back on her heels. "Your clothes are drying. I put them in the washer this morning. Oh, and I called Jamie to come get you; it's almost one o'clock. I need to be at work in two hours or else I'd give you a ride home myself".

I stared at her for a minute, open-mouthed. And then, of course, I started turning all shades of crimson. I stammered out an apology and she giggled at me, never taking her eyes from me. She leaned over, kissed my cheek and whispered, "You know, just because nothing happened last night doesn't mean something can't happen now. I've always thought you were irresistible."

"I'm flattered," I stuttered out, "but I think I'll pass. Especially since I have no idea what I would be doing."

"I'd love to teach you," she murmured, rubbing her cheek against mine.

"Okay, time for me to go!" I said, hopping off the bed and dragging the sheets with me. Arianna gave another giggle and bounded off the bed.

"Fine, since you shot me down, I'll go see if your clothes are ready. Ha! At least you'll have to do the walk of shame from here," she said, laughing on her way to the laundry room.

When she got back with my clothes, I had barricaded myself in the bathroom. I heard her laughing some more (she was having a great old time at my expense) and she told me to go ahead and shower, that my clothes were outside the bathroom door.

I had to admit that shower felt wonderful and I freely used her body wash and shampoo, they smelled so heavenly. When I was done, I opened the door a crack and yanked my clothes into the bathroom. I slathered on some body lotion and quickly dressed, my hair still damp and falling in waves around my face.

When I came out and went into the living room, I was relieved to see Jamie was already there, sitting on the couch. She was wearing her yoga pants, a halter top and a ticked-off expression on her face. Her chestnut colored hair was pulled back in a ponytail and her chocolate brown eyes looked at me, unable to hide her annoyance. I knew she prized her early morning yoga sessions, so having to come pick up her hung-over best friend was a major inconvenience. I knew I would get chewed out the entire way home.

Arianna followed Jamie and I to the front door and I thanked her for putting up with me the previous night. She gave me a sexy little smile and trailed a finger down my arm. "Anytime, Kayla. I mean it." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jamie's eyes widen. Great, I thought. More explaining to do on the way home.

We got into Jamie's car and we weren't half-way down the block when she piped up.

"And what was all that about, Kayla? Something you need to tell me?" she was laying the sarcasm on big-time.

"Nothing to tell, Jamie! I passed out is all! She was just messing around," I replied, reluctant to tell her that Arianna had made a serious play for me. Jamie was not a big fan of Arianna's as it was; when Ari had started hanging around with all us, introduced through a mutual friend, Jaime had never warmed up to her.

"Really? Well, she sure makes it sound like you did a lot more than pass out," she retorted, punching the accelerator a little harder than necessary.

"Look, I passed out and woke up this morning. I took a shower, got dressed and now I'm with you going to...where exactly are we going, anyway?" I asked, realizing I didn't know where my car was.

"To my place. One of the guys brought me home last night. We dropped off my car and then went back to the club for yours. I'm sure you don't remember because you were having way too much fun with Ari."

"What are you talking about? What fun?" I was completely confused.

"Gimme a break, Kayla, alright? You and Arianna started dancing together when the DJ started playing some reggae stuff. The guys really enjoyed the show you put on. In fact," here came even more sarcasm, "I didn't even know you could dance that well. You really know how to move those hips."

"Oh, my God! What did I do?" I moaned out. "I'm never drinking again."

"You know how many times I've heard you say that over the years? And you usually say it after another disastrous one-night stand," she reminded me as she swung into her driveway.

I got out of the car and meekly followed her into her house. She tossed her keys onto the table by the front door; I noticed my keychain was already there. She pointed at it.

"There. There're your keys, so go whenever you feel like it," she said, sounding even more pissed as she walked away from me into her kitchen.

I ignored her words and followed her into the kitchen as she opened the refrigerator and pulled out a carton of orange juice. She was about to open it when I saw her change her mind. She put the OJ back in the fridge and pulled out a beer. She quickly twisted off the top and took a long swig. That was very much out of character for my health-conscious friend.

She saw me staring and sneered. "I'd offer you one, but you had enough last night."

I was completely baffled by the fact that she was so upset. And, truth be told, I was starting to get a little angry myself.

"What's your issue? Are you pissed because you had to interrupt your downward dog or sun salutation or whatever to come get me?"

She didn't answer, just took another sullen sip of her beer. I waited to see if she said anything and when she didn't, I turned and started walking away. I suddenly wanted to get out of her house and go hide in my apartment for the rest of the day.

"Whenever you decide you want to talk to me, you know where I am," I said coldly as I reached for my keys.

"I'll make sure to call Arianna and let her know you're on your way back," was the biting response.

"I'm not going to Arianna's, you idiot! I'm going home and even if I was going back to Ari's, what business is it of yours?" I yelled, finally losing my temper and turning around to face her.

She threw the empty bottle into the sink and hurriedly came out from behind the counter, spoiling for the fight. Those eyes that could be so warm and affectionate were granite right now.

"It's my business because you were too fucking drunk last night to notice she was all over you! It's my business because she was pouring so much alcohol down your throat, that I thought you'd end up choking on it. It's my business because ever since she showed up, I've been scared to death that I was going to lose my best friend to her because she's all about partying and I know you love that," she paused, catching her breath. "And it's my business because when I saw her touch your arm today, I realized...," she stopped, her eyes starting to shine with unexpected tears.

I didn't want to speak or move or even exhale. Where was Jamie going with this statement?

She inhaled as deeply as she could and closed her eyes, squeezing out a tear that trickled down her right cheek. The sight of that tear moved me beyond words and also puzzled me; why was she crying when she had been so angry with me less than five minutes ago?

"I realized that she probably got to do with you what I've been wanting to do for so long," she said, her voice so heartbreakingly sad that I thought my own eyes would begin to water at any second.

I stared at her, realization slowly dawning. She opened her eyes and looked straight at me, waiting for my reaction. Well, this definitely solved the mystery as to why Jamie disliked Arianna so much.

Without a word, I pulled her into a hug and she began crying in earnest, making me melt. I hated seeing her cry; she was an incredibly strong woman and if she had reached the point of tears, it was because she couldn't handle the foreign emotions coursing through her. I knew her that well.

"Don't," I whispered in her ear, as she clutched me tighter. "Don't cry, sweetie. I didn't know. Nothing happened, okay? Ssshh....," I said, reaching up and pulling her hair out of the ponytail so I could stroke it. It tumbled free, going past her shoulders. I ran my right hand down its soft expanse as my left arm tightened around her waist. I murmured soothing words to her as I rocked her gently against me. The hitching in her body subsided slowly and she pulled away slightly to wipe at her eyes. I reached up and gently stroked a tear off her cheek. That coaxed a smile out of her and I gladly returned it, allowing my fingers to stroke her cheek even after the tear was gone. I could see the question in her eyes and I knew I had to answer her.

"Arianna would never take your place, Jamie. She can't be you. We've been through everything together. You mean more to me than I can ever say; telling you I love you doesn't even begin to cover how much I care. I wouldn't know what to do without you," I said as gently as I could. I was rewarded with a softness stealing over her eyes, taking the place of all that sadness; it was infinitely preferable. Both my arms went around her waist and I pulled her closer until there was nothing left to do but kiss her.

I had never felt another woman's lips on mine and the sensation was electrifying. I could feel her lips trembling beneath mine a little, but once she began responding to me, it stopped. The kisses were soft at first, gentle as a breeze. Hesitant, small brushes of lips. As our bodies melded against each other, the kisses became more urgent. When I felt the tip of her tongue touch my bottom lip, I slipped my own tongue out to meet hers. They became intimately familiar, stroking each other delicately, slowly until our internal heat started demanding more.

Her hands slipped into my hair and pressed me more urgently into her. My hands responded automatically, reaching for the front of her pants and undoing the flimsy tie. Without breaking contact, she stepped out of the pants and my hands slithered over her butt, pulling her as tightly as I could against me. Her hands abandoned my hair and began undoing the buttons on my blouse. When she got it off, it joined her pants in a forgotten heap on the floor.

She was running her hands up my bare arms, her lips abandoning mine and heading for my neck, which was a major weakness. "Is this really happening?" she murmured against the base of my neck as she kissed her way up, giving me gentle nips. I had told her once that I really got off on small bites; apparently, she had filed that information away.

My eyes were half-closed at this point, enjoying the feel of her lips on me. She got to my ear and gave me another little bite, along with a tug that I felt all the way down between my legs.

"Yeah, it's happening," I answered her, once I could breathe. "And I can't believe how hot it is."

"It's gonna get hotter," she answered, starting to guide me to her bedroom, her lips back on mine.

We bumped up against the bed when she reached down to undo my jeans. "No fair," she muttered. "You have more clothes on than I do."

"So remedy the situation," I replied, taking advantage of her looking down to start my own journey on her neck. I swept that beautiful hair out of my way and sucked gently as I worked my way up. I could feel her fumbling at my button and zipper and I heard her catch her breath as I worked my way back down until my lips were at the base of her throat.

"Kayla," she sighed, as my jeans hit the floor. I wrapped my arms around her waist as I kicked the jeans away. My head dipped between her breasts and I covered them with soft nibbles until I had her moaning. I went to pull the halter top off, but she reached up and put my hands on her breasts through the material instead.

"Not yet...please...just...," she started moving my hands over her breasts, showing me what she liked. I followed her lead, just slow, easy circles until I could feel her nipples hardening under my palms. My God, I thought. Was I really eliciting this reaction from her? I ran my thumbs as feather-soft as I could over her nipples, my eyes on her face the entire time. Her eyes had grown darker as she looked at me and I was almost afraid. Could I take her where she needed to go? Could I give her what she so apparently wanted? That's a lot of pressure for someone who had never been with a girl before.

I lowered my head and just breathed against the fabric covering her. She groaned as I gave her small bites through the top. When I looked back up, she was looking at me and the look in her eyes was nothing but pure love (actually, there was a fair amount of lust in there as well). She reached out and stroked my face. The smile on her face was so delicate and beautiful that I had no doubt that she wasn't judging me or my attempts to give her the pleasure I wanted her to feel.

"You gotta tell me if I'm doing this right," I whispered. "Guys I can handle. You're different...obviously."

"Obviously," she teasingly said back and I was relieved to hear that note in her voice. So she wanted to play? I could deal with that.

"Okay, how's this?" I asked innocently, allowing my mouth to slip down over her breasts. I let my tongue flick at her nipple through the top and received a soft moan in return. "Or this?" I moved to the other breast and did the same thing. Another moan.

"And....," I started going down the front of her until I kissed and nipped my way to her belly button. I ended up on my knees in front of her, my heart pounding at the next step. I knew that I was not ready under any circumstances to kiss her there, so I placed my hands on her hips to steady her and I leaned in, blowing warm air over the center o her cute cotton hiphugger. I ran my fingernails down the insides of her thighs and made her tremble. My fingers ran back up and quickly slowed down when I got to that spot between her legs. I was going to take my time.

I watched as my fingers gently went over her hiphugger, stroking as easily as if I was petting a new-born kitten. I was in awe when the tips of my fingers started sensing moisture. She was making desperate little sounds at this point and I slowly worked my way back up her body until my lips were back on hers, my tongue looking for hers.

I timed it perfectly; my fingers found her inside her underwear right as her tongue touched mine. She moaned loudly against my mouth and we fell onto the bed in slow motion. I settled myself between her legs, my hand between us. I watched her as my fingers rubbed and stroked her into another world. My own ache would have to wait, I had decided. This was completely about her. I wanted to leave no doubt in her mind how much she meant to me.

She was moaning in total abandon now, her eyes completely closed. "Kayla," she whimpered. "God...go, keep...yeah, there...right...oh, God, don't...don't stop, baby...please."

I increased the motion of my fingers, probing and stroking, insisting that she find the release she so desperately wanted. "Jamie," I whispered, as I began kissing her again. Her hands tried to come up to my head, but they fell back onto the bed as she began trembling in earnest. "Jamie," I said again, pulling away as her tongue desperately searched for mine again. "Baby, go with it." I sucked gently on her tongue as she began to moan and move her hips against my hand. "Come on, baby, go for me," I whispered, as my fingers started feeling the rush of juices from her. "I want this for you. Let it happen, Jaime. Don't fight it. It's okay."

"Oh, God....Kayla," she whimpered, as the orgasm took over. She cried out, her arms coming up and pulling me down on her as her nails scratched across my back. She spiraled upwards, waves of pure pleasure washing over her and then slowly she started coming down. I slowed the motion of my fingers, waiting for her to come back to me. I took my hand away from between her legs and wrapped both hands in that luxurious mane of hers.

"Baby, open your eyes," I whispered and she complied dazedly; I probably looked that way as well after climaxing. I lowered my lips back to hers and just gave her kiss after kiss, my body feeling so comfortable against hers. She wrapped one leg around me and pulled the other one up against us, enclosing us even more. She reached up and pushed a strand of my hair behind my ear, a tiny smile on her lips.

"Kayla," she began, and I kissed the tip of her nose. It was adorable.

"Talk to me," I answered softly, stroking her hair and looking into those eyes.

"Does this...this was unreal, but...does it change us, does it change the you and me that we are?" she asked hesitantly, her hand coming up to stroke my cheek.

I leaned my face into the caress and smiled at her. "Baby, it doesn't change anything. You and me will always be you and me. You're the greatest friend I've ever had and I think I just proved it. You took my chick cherry!" I said mischievously, enjoying the smile that grew on her lips.