It takes some getting used to, the ways of the world these days. The sink in our kitchen had flooded the floor and of course we had to deal with it and of course it was a Saturday morning. I took a look at the spaghetti of pipes and hoses under the sink and complained to my wife June who stood watching with her arms crossed while I went on about how something that was supposed to be as simple as water coming into the house and water going out of the house could be so complicated in these modern homes.
June seemed unimpressed by my complaint and latched on to the main issue. "Can you fix it?" she asked with a hint of urgency. "I like things in our home to work."
"I've just been explaining..." I started but she cut me off.
"Just get a plumber in then," she ordered and left the kitchen and the puddle on the floor, striding out as if this failing of the house was somehow my fault.
I did the google thing and got as far down as Advanced Plumbing which seemed to be based nearby and who boasted that they did twenty-four hour callouts. Reasoning that they could only be as cheap or expensive as the rest of the alphabet I gave them a call and spoke to a receptionist who seemed to be caring enough and unfussed that it was Saturday morning. She warned me to expect the bill to be a minimum of a hundred dollars by the time the leak was found and repaired, depending on the cost of parts. But not much more than that, she told me, based on my description of the situation. "These things are usually solved pretty quickly," she assured me with what I assumed was blithe marketing confidence. But she promised that someone would be out within the hour. I hoped with that sort of service, the problem could be solved pretty quickly and we could get back to our weekend. So assuming that I had everything under control, I went back to the weekend paper. I merely had to wait and it would all be solved.
Sure enough the sort of van you would expect your local plumber to drive pulled into my driveway about forty-five minutes later. It clearly advertised it was Advanced Plumbing which gave me some immediate relief, like the problem was already solved.
I went to the window in time to see a tallish and shapely blonde woman get out of the van's driver's side. She appeared to be by herself. And indeed she was. She wore short shorts and the company issue hiviz top which suggested to me even from my distance that she had a bust worth my attention.
She knocked on the door and I immediately answered, greeting this woman from Advanced Plumbing with her bright, open face framed by a mane of blonde hair along with the rest of her readily apparent attributes down to her long tanned legs.
"You're Henry with the plumbing problem," she announced.
"You're a..." I started, hoping that she wasn't put off by how I stared, examining her.
"...plumber," she helpfully concluded for me. "Is there a problem? I thought we worked out everything on the phone? If I can have a look at your leak?"
I remembered to let her into the house. "Ah, you were the receptionist?" I asked somewhat surprised.
"Well, I answer the phone." She smiled. "I'm May. And I am a certified plumber. I realise that it can be a bit difficult for you old people."
"Old? I'm forty-four." This impertinence was not acceptable and could not be let go without some level of correction.
"Oh I am sorry," May smiled while clearly looking me over, "I thought you were older. Now if you let me, I'll have a look at your plumbing and see if I can get your waterworks operating right again." She gave me a salacious smile with that as I led her to the kitchen.
There would be a reckoning for that too, I thought, but later. A reckoning after we got my immediate problem solved. I guessed that June was busy out in our back garden, so I would have to think ahead if I was going to get my revenge on May while keeping June in the dark about anything that went on.
I sat at the kitchen table and started to scroll through my phone as May got down on her knees to look under the sink. I looked over at her at just the right moment. Her head was in the cabinet thing right under the sink as her shorts stretched enticingly over her bottom. Since she was there and I was here I could make a close inspection of what was before me. Suddenly May turned around to me.
"What are you doing?" she snapped.
I smiled. "Keeping an eye on you. Health and safety and all of that." Which in a sense was true. You don't leave someone in that position by themselves. It's in all the safety manuals. I explained that to May and she shook her head and smiled in a way that seemed agreeable and enticing. I felt a stirring in my pants in response. May went back to looking for the problem, so I adjusted my cock which had started to grow, getting a little uncomfortable in my pants from all the watching. I also switched my phone to film her. It might be a while before I saw a bottom like that again so I decided that I needed a record. It really was quite an impressive bottom, round, not too large, with a nice arc curving into her bare legs. I got thinking about what May might do with it for pleasure. I realised that I was adjusting my cock again which was natural given the situation that presented itself to me.
May stood up and smiled at me, returning my concentration to the damp problem in front of us. "I've found what the problem is," she announced and used what I assumed was genuine plumbing terminology to explain her diagnosis. I was slightly distracted by the way that her shirt had bunched up around her bust suggesting that her breasts were somewhat larger and more enticing than I had first imagined.
She clearly intended to impress me with her plumbing knowledge. When she finished I asked "can you fix it?" meaning I wanted to know if she could fix it right away.
Fortunately, May nodded and told me that she had to go to the van to get the parts and everything would be sorted soon. She smiled oddly when she said that.
"Do you need a hand?" I asked her but she shook her head.
"You just watch," she told me as she strode purposefully out of the room again giving me a different but equally pleasant view of her backside. I wondered about getting the chance to see more of it.
However, like something from an English bedroom farce, with May out of the house, June came back into the room while I sat and waited. "Is everything under control?" she asked in her now familiar distant way.
I explained that May had gone to her van to get the parts, but June showed as much interest in what I was saying as I had shown to May's plumbing explanation. "Tell me when it's fixed," June ordered and disappeared back to whatever she had been doing.
May of course returned almost straight after with some items which I assumed were plumbing related and were presumably what was needed to solve my problem. She got back into her position on the floor to do the repairs. I again was fiddling with my phone and again found myself filming May at work again. With of course her bum and her legs being my main focus. As she strained to remove some parts and attach others, I was sure that her shorts rode more tightly up into her crotch giving me a pretty good idea of what she would look like without them. So I focussed in, just to be sure.
May surprised me when she again turned around. "Fixed," she told me. Again with that knowing smile.
"That didn't take long," I complemented her. "I guess it helps to know what you're doing."
"Indeed," she agreed. She stood up and tugged her shorts back down into their right place. "Now there's something else we have to fix. You were filming me from behind while I was working. I trust you got some nice footage of my bum."
I held her eye contact. "Yes," I told her. "Health and safety reasons. So I would have evidence if anything went wrong." I got a bit stern with my tone. "That's quite a suggestion on your part." I wondered at what I could do to quell this rebellion and started to think through my possibilities.
But May didn't seem concerned at my challenge. If anything that nagging smile got more malevolent. She held my stare. "Health and safety is all very well, But you see I have this video of you wanking over me." She let that float between us for a moment of contemplation.
I shifted in my chair, which given my state may not have been the best thing to do. "Well, I wouldn't call it wanking," I told her.
She scrolled through her phone and studied a video, apparently of me. "I would," she retorted and held her phone towards me. "Perhaps we could review all of my footage. And also one of us has a problem the other doesn't. One of us has a wife in the house and the other one doesn't. And," she added pointing, "one of us currently has an erection. So that kind of tips the balance. Especially as the wife one of us has is, as I said, here in the house somewhere and could appear at any moment."
"How do you know she'll be upset at any of this?" I smiled trying to convey that of course June would not be worried by a covered erection and a video recording of a visitor's bottom.
May did not seem fussed though. "Oh, I can tell the type." Well, she was right there. Bluff called. "And I'll take fifty dollars off my otherwise inflated bill to make you feel better about it."
"So what are you suggesting?" I guessed I better ask.
May walked over close to where I was sitting to stare down at me. The smile had become dark, threatening. "Well, let's get a good look at you, for a start."
"Meaning?" I asked her.
"Get those pants down. Let's see what effect my bottom had on your manhood."
I looked at May hard. I was being asked to expose myself by this extremely attractive and playful woman. Well, why not? I'd think of something to tell June if I needed to. I started to unbuckle my jeans when May told me to stop. "I'd rather you stood up when you did it." Okay that was easy. I stood up and May immediately sat down on the chair I had vacated. My jeans were down below my knees. And I thought my cock must seem quite impressive, hinting at its decent size while still covered by my cotton jocks.
"Now over my knee," May ordered.
