I stared at Jake over my open can of Rolling Rock. "Another boring Friday night," I grumped. "I'm broke and stuck here with you. Six months out of college, with a degree, and I can't even find a job as a cashier, let alone one relevant to my education."
Jake laughed. He knew the criticism wasn't personal. I just needed to blow off steam. "Lance, something will turn up. Finish your beer and let's watch the game. It'll start in a few minutes." He turned on the TV and tuned it to BeIN, where the live soccer game from halfway across the world was indeed about to begin.
The next morning, I was combing through the classifieds in the newspaper when Jake's alert eyes spotted something. "How about this one, Lance?"
I looked at the ad. "Personal assistant needed for female executive. Call or email for interview." The ad listed hours in which to call, an e-mail address and a phone number. Surprisingly, Saturday was listed as acceptable for calling. I called the phone number provided at once.
The phone rang twice before it was picked up. An authoritative female voice came on the line. "Melissa Rogers speaking."
"Miss Rogers, I'm Lance Hendricks. I'm calling about the personal assistant position. Can I schedule an interview?"
"I'm actually holding a group interview at 5 p.m. today. Dress well for it. The address is --"
"Hold on one moment. Let me get a pen and some paper."
I wrote down the address -- and the directions -- she provided, and told her I would be there at 5 p.m. sharp. I prepped carefully, showering twice to be certain I was fully clean, wearing my nicest button-down shirt and my black slacks, and shaving my thin, short facial hair completely off. At 4:55, I knocked on the door. "Come in," came Melissa's powerful voice.
I entered. Melissa was big all around. She was at least 6 feet tall, and had to weigh 300 pounds. Her hair, black with a bit of gray in it, was in a tight bun. She gestured to a chair, and I sat down in it. There were 9 other people sitting in the row of chairs against the living room wall. Melissa stood, towering over us all.
"Welcome to my home," she announced. "Did you all bring a resume?" I handed mine over, as did all the other people -- 4 other men and 5 women. She quickly looked them over. "Now I'll ask all of you some questions."
I felt more nervous than I'd ever been as the questioning began. Each and every one of us had to answer in turn. The process took two full hours. Finally, it was finished.
Melissa paced slowly back and forth, carefully studying all of us, for a few minutes longer. No one dared to say a word. I was barely able to breathe. Just as the tension had reached an unbearable level, Melissa spoke. "Lance, please stay. The rest of you, leave now."