The camera comes up on a tall, brown-haired man with an impossibly white smile. He's dressed in a blue suit and a red tie, with his hair held tightly in place by gel, and he holds up a microphone. Behind him, a large crowd sits, cheering.
"Hi, I'm Biff Biffwell, and welcome to the game show that's making people everywhere. Welcome to..."
He gestures back at the crowd, who, on cue, shout, "Millionaire! Or! Mommy!"
"That's right," Biff says, "it's Millionaire or Mommy, the game show where a woman's fortunes are being changed one way or another. Let's meet today's contestant."
He walks across the stage to where a young woman stands. Her fingers twist together as she gives him a nervous smile. She's short, with a pale, oval face and wide blue eyes under long black hair in a ponytail. Her large breasts push out the thin blue tank top she's wearing, and her well-shaped legs are on display under her short black skirt. She's wearing black 2" heels, shifting from one foot to another.
"Hi, and your name is?" Biff says, holding out the microphone to her.
"Tammy. Tammy Johansen," she says, giving him a faint smile.
"Hello, Tammy. And what are your plans for your winnings?"
"Student loans," she says. "And maybe a trip."
Biff nods eagerly. "I know you know the rules, but I'll go over them for any new viewers. Tammy will have an ankle cuff locked to a track that starts out twenty meters from that furthest button over there," he points to the far end of the stage, where four buttons are evenly spaced in a line. "I'll be asking her questions. Each time she gets a question right, the track will let her move forward another meter. Every five meters, she'll push a button and end a round, which locks in her winnings to that point. The first button is a thousand dollars, the second is ten thousand, the third is a hundred thousand, and the fourth is one million dollars.
"However, behind her will be one of our enforcers, also locked to the track. One was chosen at random earlier, and his name placed in this envelope that Charity is bringing me." Biff takes an envelope from a blonde young woman wearing a sparkly red evening gown, and hands it to Tammy.
With a wary smile, Tammy and opens it. She looks at the paper inside and whispers, "Shit."
Biff plucks the paper from Tammy's fingers. Holding it out in front of him, he says into his microphone, "Oh, my. With the best record in Millionaire or Mommy history, today's enforcer is...The Sexecutioner!"
The spotlight shifts to the door from backstage, and a large Latino man walks through. He wears a leather executioner's mask covering the top of his head, a leather vest, tight leather pants with a noticeable bulge, and leather boots. He sticks his thumbs in his leather belt and gives Tammy a predatory grin.
Biff continues, "The Sexecutioner will start two meters behind her. Every second, he can move forward by two centimeters; in addition, every time she gets a question wrong, he gets an additional fifteen seconds' worth, thirty centimeters. Every round, those numbers increase. If he gets in range of Tammy, he can touch everything he can reach, and if that distracts her too much to answer...well, that's how the game is played. If he catches up to her, he can fuck her. Tammy's goal is to reach that fourth button before he comes inside of her."
Biff gives Tammy a vicious smile. "To make sure she's got some skin in the game, so to speak, Tammy has been given fertility drugs, and we know she's just about to ovulate. The Sexecutioner, of course, is notorious for his fertility even among our enforcers. Out of twenty-two wins, he has sixteen single births, one pair of twins, four women still pregnant, and only one miscarriage." The camera pans across the Barefoot and Pregnant board, pairs of high-heeled shoes on racks with pictures of women behind them. The images rotate between the woman at the beginning of the round, her splayed on the floor naked, and a close-up of her pussy, semen dripping out of it. Some cycle on to the same woman, very pregnant, or holding a baby.
Tammy shivers as she looks at the enforcer, who leers back at her. Her eyes drift down to the bulge in his pants, and she bites her bottom lip nervously.
"Alright, let's get everyone in position," Biff says. Tammy is led over to the track, and a leather cuff is attached to her left ankle. A short chain from it runs to a track off to the side. Behind her, a similar but larger cuff is attached around the Sexecutioner's ankle. Meanwhile, Biff continues talking. "With a record of 22 and 3, giving him a whopping 88% win percentage, The Sexecutioner leads the enforcer standings by a full six percentage points over second-place The Stallion. With 22 wins, he stands third in the all-time win column, behind only first-season legend The Sperminator and current competitor Captain Potency."
Biff walks over next to Tammy. Charity, smiling a plastic smile, hands him a stack of cards before walking away. "Okay, we're all set to go, so let's play...Millionaire or Mommy!" The crowd cheers for a moment before quieting down. Biff holds up his cards and says, "Round one begins...now! What is the capital of Brazil?"
"Brasilia!" Tammy shouts, and her track unlocks with an audible 'click'. A meter-long segment of green light turns on next to it. She steps forward and it follows, up until the end of the green light where it clicks into place again. Behind her, The Sexecutioner stands still, arms crossed and feet spread wide, a large smile on his face as a blue light next to him slowly grows.
She quickly gets the next three questions right, and the green light leads her toward the first button. As she answers her third question, the Sexecutioner steps forward half a meter or so, catching up to his bar.
On her fifth question, however, she seems stumped, and shakes her head with her eyes wide. The blue light next to the Sexecutioner is almost half a meter in front of him as it jumps in length by thirty centimeters, and he takes two steps forward before resuming his posture.
Biff reads the next card. "What is the first book of the New Testament?"
"Matthew!" Tammy says quickly, rushing forward and slamming down her hand on the button.
"Congratulations, you have completed round one! That means you have won one thousand dollars, and can continue to round two. Now, the questions get harder and the enforcer moves twice as fast. We'll start round two after a quick break to see how some of the Sexecutioner's conquests are doing now."
Biff provides a voice over as a tape of a young black woman plays. Her kinky hair is close-cropped, and her tight, short dress is pressed outward by large breasts and an even larger belly. "This is Tawny, his first competitor and first victory. Tawny, how old is Joshua now?"
She picks up a large toddler. "He's almost three. He's quite a handful. Takes after his father, I'm sure. His father stops by for his birthday, and occasionally other times as well."
"You're expecting another, I see?" Biff asks.
She blushes. "Yes, Joshua's going to have a little sister in a couple months. Sexecutioner stopped by to visit on the anniversary of Joshua's conception, and...well, one thing led to another."
The recording cuts to a young Asian woman, holding a newborn infant. "This is Aiko, his first victory of this season. Little Michiko was born two weeks ago. How are you doing, Aiko?"
"I'm fine," she says with a smile. "A hundred thousand dollars paid off my student loans, and now I've got this little doll." She hugs her child, kissing her forehead.
"How was pregnancy?"
"A bit rough. She was a big baby. Fortunately, her father came over to visit a few times during the second trimester to help relax me."
Another cut, to a busty blonde with a swollen belly. "Kristen competed six months ago, and has a unique history on our show. Can you tell us what happened?"
