Don't you just hate those light-fingered types who seem to think they have a right to help themselves to your property? I have a very nice PC at home, one capable of doing all sorts of things, and I use it extensively. Unfortunately, being a tower, it's a bit hard to carry around if I get a bright idea and want to try something out, so I also own a decent pad and a laptop.
I use the pad for taking notes, reading books, sending mail, etcetera, while the laptop is my main backup my real PC and a portable workbench when I want to do some real work away from home.
I'd recently upgraded my laptop, finding my old one just a bit underpowered for the demands I was putting on it, and then I spent time over the next few days updating the software, and taking new backups from the main PC. Finally it was ready to go.
And go was what it did. I was in the library doing some research (not everything is easily available on the internet) and found that nature was calling. I attended to natures needs and returned to my desk to find myself short one laptop. I was only gone for a minute, two at the most, and light-fingered Larry had struck.
What light-fingered Larry didn't know was that my laptop was registered with a find your phone application. I packed up what I was doing and headed out to my car and the pad therein. Connecting to the Whereisit application a map came up with my PC marked on it. I headed in that direction, noting that I was also heading homeward.
The bearing on the PC changed slightly as I drove, indicating that whoever had it was still on the move. It finally settled in the same street as my residence, about a dozen houses further down. I drove past the place in time to see a guy I knew walking from his car to the house, carrying what I damn well knew was my laptop.
I knew the sneaky bastard and I also knew that if I fronted him that he'd return the laptop and subsequently make a determined effort to break into my house to steal it again. Andrew was the type of person who, if he steals something, considers that item genuinely his and any attempts to recover the item would be regarded as theft of his property. I decided that a little discretion was called for.
Andrew and his sister both attended school and both their parents worked. I was surprised that Andrew had such a lousy work ethic considering the efforts his parents put in. Some people just don't get it, I guess. I decided that I'd come back the next day after everyone had gone to work or school and just slip into the house and retrieve the laptop. As far as Andrew was concerned the laptop would have just vanished, with him having no idea how.
I kept an eye out the next morning and around eight I saw Andrew's parents drive past, the parents in the front and Andrew and Jenny in the back. The house was empty and I could take my time dropping past and retrieving my property.
Once ten o'clock rolled around I confirmed that the laptop was still at Andrew's place and headed in that direction, strolling around to the back. (Walk into someone's place confidently and you'll never be noticed. Try to sneak in and everyone wonders what you're doing.)
I was lucky. Someone had been careless and a back window was open. It had a flywire screen but that was only held on by a couple of clips. It was the work of a moment to unclip and remove the screen. Then I simply hoisted myself up and through the window, letting myself drop to the bed I spotted next to the window.
I plopped down on the bed to the sound of a loud scream. Not my scream, I hasten to add. Jenny was there, cosily tucked up in bed and enjoying a late morning before I unexpectedly dropped in.
"What the fuck?" she yelled.
"That's exactly what I was thinking," I told her. "Why are you at home when I saw you in the car going to school? What's more, why are you in bed at this time of the morning?"
"That was Alison in the car," she retorted, "and I can sleep in if I want to. Wait. Why the hell am I explaining anything to you? More to the point, why are you jumping on my bed?"
She glared at me while I simply smiled and checked her out. She was looking delightfully dishevelled, wearing a negligee which was very thin. It wasn't see-through but that didn't really matter as it had pulled to one side and exposing a very lovely white breast with this exquisite pink tip. Being a gentleman I didn't mention this.
Before I could explain anything she started up again.
"I know you. You're that guy from up the street with the funny name."
"Greenwood Parade isn't really a funny name," I protested and she gave me an evil look.
"I meant your name, not the street's."
"Sorry. My bad. Still, I don't think Zac is that strange. I've been hearing it all my life. Do you think that maybe I've just got used to it?"
"Why are you in my house?" she asked, which was probably an effort as she was talking through gritted teeth.
"Oh, that," I said. "It's funny you should ask but I thought that seeing the place was empty I'd take the chance to recover some property of mine that light-fingered Larry acquired. Light-fingered Larry being a nom de plume for Andrew, or it would be if he ever learnt to read and write."
"What? You're crazy. Andrew wouldn't steal anything. What makes you think he did? You'd better leave right now or I'm calling the police."
"Your angelic brother would indeed steal something, in this instance my laptop. I have a trace on the laptop and the Whereisit app says it's in this house. The way I see it we can do this one of two ways. I leave the house and call the police and demonstrate that my laptop is in this house and they knock on the door and search and press charges and all that shit or I can do this."
I pulled a little gadget out of my pocket and pressed the button on it. A steady beeping noise came from a desk in the corner of the room.
Both Jenny and I turned to regard the desk, me with interest and her with a red face.
"Don't worry," I told her before she could say anything. "I don't think that you took it. I actually followed Andrew home and saw him carrying it inside. I just wanted to recover it without any fuss."
"He said it was a belated birthday present," Jenny mumbled, not looking directly at me. "I turned eighteen a month back and he's been promising me a present ever since and last night he gave me that."
"How generous of him," I murmured. "Please don't take offence but I'd be very careful of any other presents he might try to give you. Ask to see a receipt so you can register the item for a warranty."
She gave me another nasty look (she certainly had a lot of them) and then flushed again.
"Mm? Remembered another present have you?" I asked and she blushed even harder.
I fetched the laptop and turned it on.
"Sorry, but I will have to take this home with me," I told her, then blinked and looked a little harder at the damn thing as it came to life. I hastily opened folders and selected documents.
"Son of a bitch," I enunciated loudly and clearly. "That rotten swine has done a reset to factory settings. All my backups and special programs and things have all been wiped. I will strangle the fool next time I see him."
"Maybe that just means that's not your laptop," Jenny quickly decided and I just looked at her. Turning it over I popped the battery case and showed her the beeper inside, pressing my control again to start it beeping.
"Definitely mine," I told her. "It just means that your brother's an even bigger asshole than I thought."
I looked at her and my heart sank. She had tears trembling in her eyes and, what was worse, that exposed breast was quivering, drawing my attention. I was going to lose that damn laptop, I just knew it. There was only one thing I could do so I did it.
I leaned forward and kissed her, relishing the taste of her in my mouth I nibbled and sucked gently, finally lifting my head to find out what she was trying to say.
