"Would you fuck your sister for one billion dollars?" Leo asked.
As much an eighteen-year old boy as Leo, Patrick let a chuckle loose from his mouth. He said, "No money is worth bringing about incest, man."
Standing close to a towering tree, Leo continued moving yellow urine out his penis. The white clouds drifted in the sky's vast blue, indifferent to the boy who fucked, indifferent to the boy who didn't fuck.
Much to his dismay, Patrick was a virgin. His cock had never found its home inside a girl. There was a chance his cock would never find its home inside a girl. Patrick filled his mind with that thought as a strong wind moved through gaps between towering trees.
The hair strands attached to Patrick's scalp rippled, the gust in the woods making the eighteen-year-old boy's brown hair move.
"Wind." Patrick said.
"Don't worry," Leo replied. "I'm already done. The wind isn't going to get my own piss on me."
Blue jeans were zipped. And Leo sat on the brown and wooden log, taking a seat next to his closest friend in the universe, where a friend could ask their friend if they would have sex with their sister for one billion dollars.
"The Ptolemaic dynasty," Leo began. He lifted a soda-filled can off the ground, opened it. The resulting sound moved through the space. "Brothers married their sisters. Fucked them. Royals are all screwed up. People in power do fucked up shit. I'm the only child. But I could never fuck my sister. Not even for one billion. I'll say no if someone asked me the same question I asked you."
"And you would be fine with missing out on a fortune that big?" Patrick asked.
"I'll just become a successful business owner. Easy," Leo said. "Of course, it's ironic that I don't even have a sister. My guy Patrick does though."
Patrick patted Leo's back. "Once again, you disgusted me. I guess you grossing me out is never going to stop."
Leo let a laugh loose. Patrick laughed as well, but he contemplated on incest and family and incestuous families fucking each other.
A question for every single human of the world: If morality is a social construct, does that mean there is nothing wrong with incest?
If morality is not a real thing, if incest is not wrong, what makes two siblings going at it in bed an awful evil? As long as it is consensual, it's an victimless crime, no matter how you look at it. Simply put.
Patrick shook his head. He had to stop focusing on incest before he ended up coming up with great reasons why he should put his penis inside his sister, who had been born on the same day as him.
Like, there were serial killers in prison who had, during their days of freedom, came up with reasons why they should take the lives of other people.
Bad day at work? I should kill the waitress who lives next door to my Aunt Mabel.
It was as ridiculous as expecting sex from a woman after helping her move. It was something that had a big TIFU Reddit post waiting in the aftermath. That is how bad it was. How dumb it was.
And yet, when Patrick heard police sirens as he exited the woods with his best friend, the boy with the sister wanted to contemplate incest more and more. That was how he realized he was screwed. And not the good kind of screwed. The type of screwed that was "I'm a guy with an incest fetish who forgot to delete his browser history before letting his mom use his computer."
That kind of screwed.
"Hey, Pat," Leo said, nudging Patrick. He gestured to the moving police car. "What did you do?"
A chuckle left Patrick.
The police car didn't drive past the boys. Soon, two car doors opened and closed.
"Gentlemen," a voice said. Patrick and Leo turned to the blond-haired policewoman standing near the driver's side of the police car. Another policewoman stood nearby, standing close to the passenger side. She had long red hair. "You boys shouldn't walk around these woods."
"Why not?" Leo said, crossing his muscular arms. "You trying to keep us from having fun or some shit?"
Patrick's eyes widened. His heart hammering in his chest, he grabbed Leo's arm. Patrick didn't plan on seeing Leo end up on the news as a police brutality victim.
"Jeez, dude," Patrick said. "Relax!"
Leo scoffed. "Relax for what? These pigs-"
"He doesn't mean anything, officer," Patrick said to the blond-haired woman in uniform. "My friend is just being stupid. Really freaking stupid."
Patrick trained his eyes on the woman's badge.
"Officer Gale," he said. "Sorry about this guy. Again, he's just being a big idiot."
Officer Gale turned the undersides of her hands at Patrick, a smile on her face, as if Leo hadn't tried to end up in a hospital after a beating by women who enforced the law.
"Hey, kid," Officer Gale started saying. "Believe me, plenty of others give me hell. But it's best to keep calm in situations like that, even when you don't want to."
Patrick nodded his head. Leo, who continued to be the rudest damn person to a cool cop, scoffed and uncrossed his arms.
"People say they see things," said the redhead officer. Officer Cohen. She jerked a thumb at the woods that Patrick and Leo frequented. "Weird stuff in those woods. Brothers and sisters engaging in sexual intercourse. Mothers with their sons, also having sex. Fathers and daughters doing the same thing. Even teachers and their students."
"Damn, now I'm definitely going back to these woods tomorrow." Leo muttered.
"What else do they see?" Patrick asked, not bothering to question the sex stuff. He didn't plan on thinking about illegal incest around these two police officers.
"Something that looks like a bat and a man at the same time." Officer Gale replied.
Patrick ran a hand through his brown hair.
A half bat, half man creature? What the fuck kind of world was Patrick living in?
Patrick shook his head. But something made its advent behind Officer Gale, standing seven feet tall, complete with black wings that glowed in the sun dwelling in the sky's vast blue. It had to be the bat creature the policewoman had mentioned.
With its red eyes that drained all sense of bravery and teenage male masculinity, the creature hurled a predatory glare at the women donning police uniforms. Patrick and Leo took a step back.
"H-hey, officers," Patrick started saying as his fingers shook hard. He had to run off, get far away from the female police officers and that weird ass monster. "T-there's something b-behind you."