Just as you take my hand, Just as you write my number down, just as the drinks arrive, just as they play your favorite song. . .
"You know Kris, I think Radiohead might be the greatest band...*inhale*...ever..."
"Ha, yeah . . . *inhale* . . . don't I know it. They always make me feel better on shitty days. Just like . . . *inhale* . . . this . . ."
Finally, some calm in my hectic life. Nothing like weed and Radiohead to calm the mind. This almost perfect week had turned out to be a lie, just like everything else. I just needed to get away. So Lynne and I decided to drive away and be alone.
. . . Before the night owl, before the animal noises, closed circuit cameras, before you're comatose . . .
Like I said, my week was seemingly perfect. I brought in some kick-ass grades, my mom and I were finally getting along, and I was graduating soon...everything I worked hard for finally seemed to be coming together. But all of this didn't seem important after I was stabbed in the back by the person I least expected.
My best friend Ariel and her boyfriend of a year and a half had gotten into a huge argument that resulted in their breakup. It left her distraught, and I knew I had to console her somehow. Not one for drugs to remedy her sadness, I thought I'd treat her to a Girl's Day at the nearest outlet instead. That way, we could talk about her upsetting situation with Rob. There was a lot more shopping than talking, and I never found out what the basis of the argument was, and I knew I needed to know so I could help her. If Rob needed an ass kicking, I needed to know. Call it nosy. I don't care.
Later on, I spoke to Rob about it. He seemed reluctant to talk to me, but I assured him that it was okay, and that I wasn't going to curse him out. I didn't even have a reason to. I just wanted to know what the hell was going on with him and my best friend. Again, he seemed reluctant about sharing information with me. I didn't think it'd be that bad, so I told him not to beat around the bush. But the next words out of his mouth made me so sick to my stomach, that I seriously considered vomiting my lunch onto the ground.
For the past few months, my
best friend
had been fucking around with my current, well, not so current boyfriend, Carter, behind my back.
Carter and I had been going out for longer than Ariel and Rob. We met at the beginning of junior year at a football game. He was tall (about 6'2") and pretty built, had very short blonde hair and the brightest blue eyes of anyone I had ever met. He was very arrogant, yet I loved it. I couldn't help myself. "Bad boys" turned me on. We really didn't click at first, but over time we grew to like each other. I had never been as intimate with a guy until I was with Carter. He had even been the one to take my virginity. Everything felt so right with him. I never really thought he would leave me, and I never had a reason to leave him. I always thought I was more than enough woman for him, but I guess I was wrong.
How Rob found out, I don't know, but I knew that there was hell to pay. Rob wanted to find Carter and destroy him and, frankly, I wanted to as well. I wanted to drop that motherfucker while at the same time ripping each and every single strand of hair from Ariel's body. I wanted her to feel pain like no other. I was
so pissed.
From then on, I had a rain cloud over my head. I felt so shitty about myself. I became extremely antisocial; I barely talked to my friends and family. I called in sick to work just to sulk in my room with my music drowning out my thoughts. I smoked like a forest on fire. Anything to keep me thinking about what had happened. I didn't even do anything to resolve the situation, except break up with Carter through Facebook. It was tacky, but he deserved it.
Word spread about my break up with Carter and why (probably due to Rob and his friends). All I got was pity from people, and it did nothing to lighten my mood. Ariel actually had the audacity to come up to me to talk about it. That got me even more upset. Not wanting to cause too much of a scene, I told her to back off and not speak to me again. Thankfully, she got the message immediately.
Carter was braver. He tried coming over to my house while I was out so he could ambush me in front of my mom and stepdad (they loved him). Unfortunately for him, his plan backfired. I had already told my parents (I'm not an idiot) and they threatened to unleash hell's fury on him if he didn't leave our property. That was actually pretty funny, I must admit.
My somber mood was making everyone miserable. Finally, Lynne, my next door neighbor, wouldn't allow me to sit in my room and sulk any longer. So, there we were, by the beach, smoking a bowl, listening to the soulful sound of Thom Yorke's voice as it slowly massages our minds. Truly relaxing.
. . . Jigsaw falling into place, There is nothing to explain, Regard each other as you pass, She looks back, you look back, Not just once, not just twice . . .
"So...what now Kristi? Have you planned on getting sweet revenge on the mother fuckers who hurt you?"
"Honestly, I don't fucking know anymore. I hadn't really thought about it. I mean, I just want to walk away from all of this crap. I don't even wanna think about it. Can we just not talk about it?"
"Alright . . ."
"Hey, let's go somewhere else. I don't feel like staying in this same spot all night. You know that really big meadow over by Eisenhower Park? I wouldn't mind lying down over by there. Star gazing . . ."
"Woah, wait, not that one over by that really big abandoned manor, right?"
"Yes, what's the prob-"
"No, Kris, no! Are you high?!"
"Haha . . . yea . . ."
"Oh, well, so am I, but that's beside the point. You do realize that manor is haunted? Like ghosts and demons and such? I don't know about you, but I don't feel comfortable going there."
"Ghosts and demons? Are you fucking serious?"
"Hell yes I am! Connor and Jake were telling me about it. Some little girl was attacked by her dad or something."
"I cannot believe you listened to those idiots."
"They aren't idiots, Kris. And I asked my aunt about it. She said the same thing they did."
"Jesus, Lynneβ¦"
"We aren't going. I am not driving us there."
I should have taken my car,
I thought. "Fine. I'll walk."
"No, you can't do that, Kris, it's too far away. And I'm not comfortable with you going there either...by yourself, no less. Geez, let's just stay here. What's wrong with the beach?"
I sighed heavily and hopped out of the car with iPod, somewhat frustrated. I was tired of arguing with people. I decided I'd just walk a couple miles and lay down for a few hours in meadow listening to music. I just needed more time to myself anyways.
***
"You've been eyeing me all night. You expecting something?"
He looked her up and down and looked away. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, I see. Well, d'you wanna dance cutie?"
He took a sip from his drink and set it down on the bar. "No."
"C'mon. You know you wanna." She let out a small drunken giggle.