I have tried to retell this story in as much as the way it was revealed to me. The story is true, however, I have refrained from mentioning the fly's name, to protect its identity.
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Ok this is a little weird, even for me. Honestly, it is somewhat embarrassing to admit. I got turned on by a fly.
How you might ask? It was during a stint in prison, and somehow or another, I got caught up in some shit that was going down with some other inmates, and landed my ass in the hole. Ten days of solitary confinement. Naked in a small cell, no cot, just cold hard floor, a thin mat, and a thinner blanket. I lay there shivering most of the night, and just as I was about to nod out, I hear this buzzing noise.
My solitary confinement was no longer solitary. I had a new cell mate, and it wanted to play! This little pest buzzed my ears, landed on my nose, hell it was everywhere. I swatted at it, shooed it away, and generally lay there miserable for the remainder of the night.
I finally got to the point where I no longer cared if this damned fly landed on me or not. I was bone tired. At one point, I realized my cellie had stopped bombarding me and was quiet. I searched the dark room, ears straining but heard nothing. Sighing in relief, I began to drift off. I didn't know if it was night or day, as there was no window in the hole.
It was sometime later, that my cellie, the fly, woke up, and began its attack again. I became enraged, and stood up, fists cocked. I swore at the creep, threatened its life even. But still, the tenacious insect kept at me. It had the advantage of the darkness. Finally, I began to laugh, almost maniacally. If the guards could hear me, I'd be sent up for an evaluation quicker than my head could spin!