Jordan and Grogek were standing on the side of the yard, discussing the latest set of soldiers.
"I swear they get worse every batch." Jordan groaned.
"Are they scraping bottom?" Grogek sighed.
"Nah, just rushing it." Jordan scratched his head. "They want to get as many out here for the final push as possible. Maybe I'll get to show you Stormwind soon."
"That'd be nice." Grogek smiled.
"You know, it's really fascinating to see you two getting along." Joby was from the newest ship over.
"Yeah, well, only cause I'm fucking his wife." Jordan jerked his head towards Grogek.
"Yeah, well, only because I'm fucking YOUR wife." Grogek snorted.
They both looked at each other with a grin, before exploding in laughter.
Joby walked over to Gerald. "What the hell was that about?"
Gerald swallowed his bite of cookie. "They're married to the same woman."
"Wa?"
"No, it's cool. Watch this." Gerald put his hands on either side of his mouth. "HEY GROGEK!"
Grogek looked over. "WHAT?"
"I FUCKED YOUR WIFE!"
Joby gasped and stepped back.
"Well? Did you enjoy it?"
"Or are you trying to file a complaint?" Jordan snickered.
Once again both men looked at each other before doubling over in laughter.
"What are you two idiots laughing about?"
Both turned back and grinned. "Nothing?" They said in unison.
"Oh, don't YOU two start doing that. I might have to start paring down my house!"
"Elunara!" Gerald cried.
"WHAT?"
"How'd you get so freakishly strong?"
She stepped forward. "Jacking off men for forty years."
"That can't actually work." Someone muttered.
Elunara climbed up on the platform. "Hey, can I borrow your weights?"
Grogek shrugged. "You know I never deny you."
"Toss me a pair of fivers."
Grogek wandered over and grabbed a pair of five pound weights, tossing them up.
She handed one to Gerald. "Ok, now do this." She made a rapid jacking motion.
Gerald snorted and repeated the motion.
"Ok, now keep that up for a solid minute."
"Seriously?" Gerald blinked
"Seriously."
"Shit, this is hard."
"Yes, it usually is." She winked.
"Ok, ok, everyone who wants to, grab the same thing, let's see who can last the longest!" She started the motion and everyone followed.
"Elunara what the hell is going on?"
"An exercise competition. Someone asked me why I was so strong, and you know my answer. There are doubters."
"Goddamn!" Someone swore as he dropped the weight.
"I don't know why I bother asking." Renwa sighed.
"Personally, I think you like having a migraine." Elunara grinned.
Several more dropped their weights.
"I'm starting to think so too." Jordan grinned. When Renwa shot him a look, he straightened his shoulders. "Sir."
Grogek laughed, also shaking a weight up and down. "I don't do this on my own that often."
"Bragging or complaining?"
"Oh, definitely bragging."
"Elunara?" Renwa sighed.
"Yeah?"
"Everyone else has stopped."
"Really? Lame."
"You can stop now."
She laughed and tossed the weight down. "After awhile, you stop noticing it. Anyone else have any dumb questions?"
"Yeah, how many men have you fucked?"
"I'd have to check my books, but I know it's in the thousands somewhere. It gets a little fuzzy when you get up in the five and six at a time ranges. Any others?"
"What's the weirdest?"
"Dragonkin has to top the list."
Even Renwa froze at that one. "What?"
"When I was on mission to join the Twilight cultists, I discovered some really disturbing shit. Everyone knows that they torture their initiates, but what few actually know, is that every batch of new cultists are given to the twilight dragons to "play" with. Many are eaten, most are tortured, but a few... well, I assure you, that you'd rather be tortured. They don't differentiate between male or female either. Those that survive the process are usually fucked up beyond belief. There's no mistaking that. Lots of them wind up killing themselves... or worse. A clean death is always the quickest. In any event, I knew that in order to survive, forget finish the mission... I had to do the unthinkable, and actually volunteer for the process.
Now, I won't tell you the specifics, but I will tell you that I survived because I am a pro, and because I can make any situation work for me."
"I sent you on that mission." Renwa whispered.
"There was no way of knowing the truth and, quite frankly, only the highest of the twilight know about it. In fact, I try not to think too hard about it." She sighed. "Since I have broken your brains, I'll return to my original goal of drawing on this beautiful day." She jumped down and grabbed her board, only to be squished between Grogek and Jordan. Her board clattered to the ground.
"Baby, I had no idea."
"My love, you never wrote on it."
"I did. I hid those pages. In fact, the only copy of those pages is hidden in the SI:7 headquarters. Only Mathias himself knows the content of those pages."
"Now I know why none of our other agents returned." Renwa frowned.
"Two of them were eaten. One of them was found out and... skinned alive. I have no knowledge of any others."
"We sent seven. When you returned, Mathias called you our lucky seven."
She shrugged. "I am a pro." Her eyes went wide as Renwa wrapped his arms around her. "Oh Gods, it was eight years ago. I'm over it." She rolled her eyes. "Curse this honesty bent you lunatics have me on." With a sigh, she pushed him off of her. "I'm over it. It's more of an amusing anecdote now. Don't worry about it."
"I still feel bad I put you in the way of that."
"I'll try anything once." She winked, before picking up her board and heading up the hill.
Grogek nudged Jordan. "Now's as good of a time as any to tell you what I planned for Elunara's birthday this year."
"Momma!" Both boys launched themselves into the bed. "We heard it was your birthday!"
Elunara groaned. "I did not want broken ribs for my birthday."
"Sorry, Momma." Bradly wiggled out of the way.
"How old are you, Momma?" Darguni cocked his head to the side.
Elunara mentally counted. "Sixty."
"You don't look sixty." Bradly frowned.
"I age about half the rate of a human, maybe even slower. I'll look like this for quite awhile."
"What do you want for your birthday?"
Elunara scrubbed her hand on Bradly's head. "What I want, I can't have for some time."
"What?"
"To take my family to see the major capitals of Azeroth. Until we can leave Draenor with no problems, I can't have that."
"Oh." Darguni fidgeted. "Well, how about we bathe the cats, and do the town chores today?"
"Sounds lovely. I have some Library work I want to do."
"We'll do the best job!" Bradly tugged Darguni out of the room.
Once they were out of the house, Bradly turned to Darguni. "Let's get Ina, we can have a party!"
"Yeah!"
"The big six-o, huh?" Jordan grinned.
Elunara stretched and headed to the closet. "Yeah. Don't fuss. Not a fan of being reminded how much older I am than everyone else."
"It's ok; Renwa's been on my ass about turning in my paperwork on time for once."
Elunara snorted. "More like Zelinnia's been on HIS ass. That woman is a slave driver on her paperwork."
He brushed a kiss on her lips. "Happy Birthday anyway, Baby."
She cuddled against him. "My family is my birthday present."
Grogek grinned as Jordan walked out. "I got you a present anyway."
"Oh?"
He shook his head. "I have to go get it."
She rolled her eyes. "Fine." She tugged a fang down and assaulted his mouth. "Not like you can top the last couple you've given me."
He winked and walked out. Downstairs, he eyed Lucy. "You'll want to clear the house for the next... four or five hours. Better yet, just observe the signs."
She sighed. "I know how this house works."
"It's Elunara's birthday."
"Really?"
"She's sixty."
Lucy's eyebrows shot up. "That's Night Elves for you."
Tulani sighed. "Forgive me; I worked on yours for months. I'm not taking it back now."