Chapter 1
If you're a divorced woman over forty, I needn't tell you how scarce men are who show you any interest. The amount of sex you get is fully up to you and I don't mean hanging around bars, I mean using that drawer full of sex toys.
So, I'd long ago settled into providing for my own sexual entertainment and, while I'd rather have something entering me that had blood flowing through it keeping it hard and swollen, rigid plastic and my own fingers are the reality.
Here I am, forty-four, single, as I've said, with two sons, Mike, twenty-three, and Andy, twenty-one.
They both live on their own in the same area and they often come over for a home-cooked meal. They know I like my red wine with meals and they always bring me bottles to share over a meal together.
So, this one Saturday evening, Mike asked me, changing the subject, "So, Mom, any guys in your life? You really need some fun."
I laughed and told him, "They're so many younger women around that I don't have a chance."
"Yeah, but, look, you're pretty nice yourself, even kinda hot, if you ask me," Andy said. I gave him one of those 'oh, yeah?' looks but his older brother popped right in with, "You are, Mom, you look good."
"Well, I'm just not really looking for some longterm thing, that's all."
"Yeah, but we both think you're pretty hot stuff."
"Well, I'm just perfectly happy with my two men right here," I said as I put my hands on each of their arms.
"Don't tell me we're turning into one of those families, Mom," Andy said, laughing.
"Well, I do have two very handsome and virile sons," I added.
"And a very hot and sexy mom, we'd all be just perfect to be one of those kinds of families," Mike said as we all laughed.
Then Andy said,"Truth is, neither of us is involved with anybody at the moment and neither are you, Mom; maybe it's not such a bad idea. Kind of solves some problems. Could be pretty convenient all around."
"I think that's all the wine we should have, guys," I told them and pulled the bottle toward me.
Andy reached over and took it back, lifting it up to pour our three glasses full, saying, "Maybe we actually need to have a little more?" and lifted his glass as he and his brother clinked theirs.
"Look, I know we were kidding when we started but, well, it would give us all some relief from the loneliness and physical isolation we all feel. Why not, Mom?" Mike asked.
"Oh, guys, look, each of you is a good-looking guy, you can do lots better than someone old like me. And, I'm your mother, that's rather hard to deny."
"But, Mom," Andy pressed, "it's not like anybody's talking about settling down to start a family. The way I see it, it's a temporary thing until each of us finds someone. It's an accommodation, a family accommodation."
"But there are so many more desirable women out there, come on."
"Why don't you leave that up to us? Let us be the judge of how attractive you are. I can tell you this, Mom, the whole thing has, now geez, don't get pissed, but this whole discussion has given me a huge erection," Andy admitted.
"Oh, come on, we could be talking about football scores with guys your age and that would happen," I shot back.
"No, Mom, it's you. You are a sexy woman. Women today don't age like they did back in Grandma's time. You look good, really good. And, yes, you give your son an erection. Wanna see it?"
"Okay, no more wine, you two," I said jokingly as I pulled their glasses away.
"You've had the same effect on me, Mom. Why can't you understand you're a hot-looking woman?" Mike asked me.
"Well, maybe to an older man," I tried to convince them and me.
"I hate to eat and run but I've had a long week and I'm bushed," Mike said, as he got up. "Andy, help Mom clean up, okay?" and he leaned over as I offered my cheek. He turned my head and kissed me on the lips, not real hard, but firmly enough, then he made his leave.
Andy was picking up our dishes and taking them in the kitchen and when I joined him to begin cleaning up, he suddenly turned to me and pulled me into his arms, kissing me, sending his tongue deeply into my mouth.
It was so sudden, there was no resistance. I was shocked at how it made me feel, mothers are not supposed to feel that way in their son's arms.
But I did pull away.
"Andy, goodness, what's come over you?"
"I'm sorry, Mom, it's just that I didn't realize how strongly I was attracted to you until now. Can I stay the night? Can we sleep together?"
Stunned, totally stunned.
"We won't do anything you don't want to do. I'd just like us to sleep in one another's arms tonight."
"It's just not proper, Andrew, it's not," I feebly answered, still held in his arms.
Was I sexually excited? I have to be honest, I was turned-on like never before. It was there, the feelings of sex, I had to admit. And, he was there, as well. What was pressing into my middle was a full-fledged erection of a grown, virile man. No question.
"I want to stay, Mom," he said looking down into my eyes so sweetly.
"You'll keep your hands to yourself? I mean hugging and holding each other's okay but my breasts and middle are off-limits, right?"
"That's fine, Mom."
"And Michael is never to know about this?"
He agreed and we began turning out the lights and went up to my room.
I went off to my bathroom to change, asking myself over and over just why was I doing this and pulled on a long flannel nightgown that was my least seductive.
When I came back in, he was already under the covers.
"You are wearing something under there, right?" I asked and he told me he had his boxers on. I lifted the sheet and slipped in next to him and reached over and turned out the light.