AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story owes a great debt to "Six Times a Day" and its author, spacer_x, along with many others.
-------
Josh's first semester came to an end eventually, and he had a long winter break to look forward to. He'd made more friends and found himself invited to more parties, but had no more luck with the ladies.
He made his way down to the kitchen to find him Allie, his mom, just about to leave for work. Her job as an architect's assistant had kept her gainfully employed for many years, even before Josh's father had died. Afterwards, her boss gave her what she only partly-jokingly referred to as a "sympathy promotion." They'd managed to remain fairly comfortable ever since.
"You're dressed up fancy," Josh said.
"What, this old thing?" Allie put a hand to her hip like a model and gave a quarter turn. She wore a crisp white shirt and knee-length black shirt, along with some tall black heels. She laughed. "Big meeting today with some new clients. Part of selling the company is selling yourself."
"Selling yourself?" Josh raised a skeptical eyebrow.
"Ah, the idealism of youth," Allie retorted. She starting packing up her purse and Josh noticed a large gap between the buttons on her shirt where they drew tight over her boobs. She was wearing a lacy white bra with intricate little patterns creating a myriad of tiny gaps that exposed her soft flesh. She took a deep breath and her shirt constricted even tighter. He gritted his teeth and tried to look away, though his eyes darted back at least once.
"Yes, we all sell ourselves a little. It's what paying the bills is all about." She turned to face him. "Speaking of... what are you going to do with yourself during winter break."
"Uhhhhh..." His jaw hung open. What was he going to do?
"Might I suggest... a job?" Allie said coyly.
"A job..."
"Yes, Josh, a job. You go there and work. They give you money in exchange."
"Right."
She rolled her eyes and kissed him on the forehead. "Find a job by the end of the day." Then she turned and strutted out the door, her high heels clapping on the wooden floor boards.
A job. Yeah, he supposed now that he should get a job. He'd been looking forward to lounging about the house, probably masturbating more than was healthy. But his mother worked so hard to keep a roof over their heads. He could at least earn his keep.
----------------------
When Allie returned at six o'clock that evening, Josh surprised her with a business card on the kitchen table.
"What's this?" she asked.
"Read it."
"O'Donnell Brothers. House Painting, Repairs, Moving Services. Call for a Quote." She set the card down and looked at his squarely. "Are you moving out or getting the house painted?" she asked.
"No, it's my new job!" he said laughing.
"Yeah," she retorted. "I kind of guessed that. Come here." She took him in her open arms and squeezed him tight. "Thank you. I really appreciate it." He tried to extract himself, which put about a foot of distance between them. He was just raising an arm between them when she pulled in him for second hug and, to his horror, found his hand mashed into her tit. She let go suddenly. Josh went red in the face.
"Sorry. Sorry sorry sorry," he said, backing away. He dashed out the room and up the steps, shouting "let me know when dinner's ready!"
I have got to get laid! he thought as he clambered up the steps.
----------------------
After a tough week of painting and hauling moving boxes back and forth, Josh was exhausted and grateful to get his first paycheck.
"You did good, kid," said the Mr. O'Donnell. Josh had assumed that the grizzled old man had hated him, given the verbal abuse he'd been dishing out all week, but apparently not. "Most college boys your age quit after the first day. I added a little something extra in there." He smiled and handed him the check.
"Wow, thank you," was all Josh could muster.
"Don't let it go to your head." Mr. O'Donnell hopped in the cab of his truck and slammed the door. He was just about to hit the gas when he leaned out the window and said, "Do me a favor and get yourself laid this weekend. I don't wanna watch another week of you eye-fucking the female customers." The motor revved and he sped away, cackling like a madman.
Eye-fucking the customers, he thought. He hadn't even realized he was doing so. Sure, the lady they'd just moved into a new house was moderately attractive and, sure, he'd snuck a peek down her blouse. Apparently he was more desperate than he even knew.
Get yourself laid. Good advice. Josh thought to himself as he drove away. Now I just need to figure out how.
----------------------
Over dinner that night, Josh came up with a plan. He couldn't possibly go another semester without having sex. Ogling the customers, these impure thoughts about his own mother, they couldn't go on. Something had to be done.
"Penny for your thoughts," Allie said as stared across the dinner table. She had changed from her work clothes into an old tee shirt and jeans, but she still looked great, he thought. "You've been quiet since you got home, up in your room, typing away."
"Oh, nothing," Josh said. "Just seeing if anyone was around to hang out later. What are you doing tonight?"
She swept her hands down her body to indicate her apparel. "What's it look like to you? I've got my do-nuthin' outfit on, and that's exactly what I'm doing. Nuthin'."
"You should go out," he said for what seemed like the hundredth time.