"Welcome! I'd give you the grand tour, but except for the bathroom you can see the whole place from where you're standing."
Joey looked around the studio apartment. It really was small, but it was his sister Jessica's first place of her own, after sharing a house with roommates.
"That corner's the bedroom, that corner's the kitchen," Jessica continued. "And leaning against that wall is your accommodations, the finest air mattress money can buy. It'll go right there."
"It looks nice, Jess," said Joey. "Are you sure you won't feel too crowded with me here?"
"Naw, it'll be fun hanging out together. You need a change of scene from Mom and Dad's place. And I don't mind having to step over you for a couple nights."
He sat down in one of the two chairs next to her little table. His sister sat on the edge of her single bed.
"So how's tricks?" she asked. "Are you still going out with Cindy?"
"I'm not sure I ever was. I only saw her a couple times and then she basically told me, I'm not your girlfriend, stop asking me out."
"Aw, I'm sorry, Joey."
"I'm pretty hopeless when it comes to women."
"Don't talk like that," said Jessica. I know you'll meet someone, just wait and see. At least you're not a virgin. I mean, there was that one time last summer, right?"
"Ha! The one and only time, and that was a fluke. Lauren just wanted to satisfy her curiosity, and I was the one who happened to be handiest."
"You're awfully cynical for a guy who's only 19 years old."
"And you're awfully full of wisdom for someone who's only, um..."
"Twenty-three. But girls mature faster than boys, everybody knows that."
"What about you?" Joey asked. "Are you going out with anyone?"
"Nope. This past year I've been too busy getting my life together to deal with the whole boyfriend thing." She paused, looking thoughtful. "Maybe you'd meet more girls if you lived on campus."
"No way. They'd put me in the old dorms. Two people in a room and zero privacy, ever. At least at home I have my own room with a door I can close."
"Yeah, where you can jack off to porn on your laptop without being disturbed. If you don't forget to lock the door." She grinned at him.
"Jeez, you catch a guy one time..."
"I'm sorry, Joey, you know I'm only teasing. There's nothing wrong with watching porn, everybody does it."
"Oh yeah? Do you do it?"
"Well, I've looked at some. I have to admit, most of the time I'd rather just use my imagination. So many of those porn videos are way too extreme for me. It's just a bunch of men's fantasies."
"That's one of the problems," said Joey. "Men are much more likely than women to have a lot of perverted fantasies, that most women aren't into."
"What do you mean? What kind of perverted fantasies are you into, baby bro?"
"I didn't say I had any! I'm just saying, my fantasy life is so far ahead of my reality that my reality will never catch up."
"Your fantasy life? Come on, Joey, what are you into? It's not something violent, is it?"
"Of course not!"
"Or videos where men dominate women, call them bitches are whores and shit like that?"
"No! I hate that kind of stuff!"
"Well then, what could it be? Come on, Joey, what's your kink?"
"Look, I'd consider myself really lucky to just have plain vanilla sex. Please, forget I said anything."
"Joey, I'm really serious now," said Jessica. "You'd better tell me what it is, or I'll just imagine it's something even worse."
He said nothing.
"Come on, Joey, please."
"If I told you what I'm thinking of, I don't think you'd be horrified, but you'd probably say 'Ewww.'"
"'Ewww'? Is it something involving the butt?"
"The butt? Uh... not necessarily."
"Not necessarily!? What's that supposed to mean? Come on, Joey, you have to tell me now."
He looked down at the floor. "Peeing."
"What? Did you say 'peeing'?"
"Yes. I think peeing is sexy."
"Oh. Well, that's not so bad. Wait, how could peeing involve the butt?"
"Well, you could pee ON someone's butt..."
She laughed. "That's true, I didn't think of that. But is this some kind of degradation and humiliation thing?"
"No, no. I just think it's sexy, that's all."
"Huh. Well, I admit it's pretty out there, but at least it's not violent or dangerous. But don't you have to worry about germs?"
"Not if you're healthy and you don't have a urinary tract infection. Normally, pee is pretty harmless stuff."
"I can tell you've really read up on this," Jessica teased.
"My point is," said Joey, "even if I manage to find a woman who'll have sex with me, it's one in a million that I'd ever find one who'd be into peeing."
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe she'd do it just to make you happy. I mean, depending on what it is. Like, if you just wanted to watch her pee, heck, I'd do that if my boyfriend wanted me to."
"I don't think most women are as understanding as you."
Jessica came over to Joey's chair and bent down to give him a hug, her head over his shoulder, her soft hair brushing his cheek. He caught a faint scent of perfume while she said, "Thanks for telling me, anyway. And I hope you find your pee girl."
***
They decided to get takeout and then spend the evening watching a movie. The TV was opposite Jessica's bed, where she watched while lying on her side, with Joey on the air mattress on the floor.
They were about halfway through the movie when Jessica said, "Hey, Joey? I have to pee."
"Okay, I'll pause it." He reached for the remote.
"You wanna watch?"
"Huh? Watch what?"
"Watch me pee."
"Watch you pee? Are you serious?"
"Hey, you think peeing is sexy, and here I am with a full bladder, why shouldn't I treat you to a show?"
Because you're my sister, Joey thought, but he didn't say it.
"You're not making fun of me?" Joey said.
"I promise I'm not making fun of you. Come on, I seriously have to go, do you want to watch or not?"