We lost mom five years ago. I was thirteen and my older sister Trisha was sixteen. Her death was sudden; she died in a car accident when her car hit a patch of black ice. It was devastating. Trisha and I were completely shell shocked and dad was a wreck. He and mom had had a great relationship, the kind that always made other older couples jealous. They were high school sweethearts and got married in college. They were totally in love up to the day she died. I know my dad still loves her, even though she's gone.
While my mom's death was the single worst thing that had ever happened to me, it did bring our family a bit closer. My sister took on a new role in our family about a year after the accident. I don't know what really happened to make her change so much but all of the sudden she was a lot more mature. She helped out around the house without being asked and began to cook dinner for me and dad. She would tuck me in at night even though it was unnecessary; I was fourteen after all but didn't have the heart to tell her. After awhile I realized she was trying to be "mom" to me and "wife" to dad. Even now I feel sorry that I didn't help her more, I just wanted to get on with my life. I suppose I was in denial.
My relationship with my dad, while always good, became a lot better. Losing someone you love so much made it that much more important to not take anyone or anything for granted. My dad tried doubly hard to make sure my sister and I were happy. While he'd always been a typical, somewhat strict dad, he now gave us a lot more leeway, as long as we were honest with him. He tried to be a friend as well as a father and for the most part it worked out fine. Of course Trisha and I both had a few rebellious moments but we worked through them.
Trisha is in college now and I'm in my last year of high school. Though Trisha was accepted at a lot of great schools, including Dartmouth, she decided to go to Ohio State instead, to so she could live at home. My dad tried to change her mind but she wouldn't hear of it.
Everything about my life had started to feel normal until last Saturday. Trisha and I were watching America's Next Top Model, the same we do every Saturday and then our dad walked out of his room and everything changed. Instead of his usual jeans and faded t-shirt, he had on black slacks, a light blue linen shirt that was buttoned up and tucked in and he had on a copious amount of cologne. He'd put gel in his hair and had styled it. He faced us with what looked like an apologetic smile.
"Girls...I'm going out. Should be back by eleven or so."
"Where are you going?" Trisha asked.
"To have some drinks with Sandy Perkiss."
"Our new neighbor?"
"Yeah. She asked if I knew of any good bars in town and I told her I knew a few. So I'm going to show her around town tonight. Shouldn't be back too late."
Before we could interrogate him further he'd grabbed his keys and wallet off of the console table and had walked out the door. Trisha and I looked at one another, shocked.
"Is he going on a date?" I asked Trisha.
"He'd better not be," she said blackly.
Trisha abruptly turned off the television and went into her room. She slammed the door shut.
I wasn't exactly sure what to do with myself. This was really weird. I couldn't imagine my dad going out with that woman. I shook my head and tried to not think about it. I decided to go to my friends house to get my mind off it.
I came back around midnight. My dad's truck was not parked in the driveway. I walked in the front door and saw that Trisha was sitting in a living room chair, alone in the dark.
"What are you doing?" I asked her.
"Waiting for dad to come home."
"I don't think it matters where you wait for him."
"Shut up Tess."
I was really surprised but not about to argue with her. She was in one of her super bitch moods. I grabbed a can of Nestea from the fridge and retreated to my room. I put on my headphones and played with my ipod until I found the new Muse album. I turned up the volume and fell asleep after listening to a few of the songs.
The next morning, I peeked out the window and saw that my dad's truck was where it normally was. I got out of bed, went into the bathroom and ran through my normal routine. I headed into the kitchen and was surprised by the standoff I saw in front of me.
Trisha and my dad had squared off over the kitchen counter. Both of their faces were red and they looked as though they'd been yelling at each other. When they saw me they both calmed down and tried to pretend that nothing was going on. My dad mumbled some excuse about having to mow the lawn (that he'd mowed three days before) and Trisha claimed that she had to go to class (even though it was Sunday). I decided to just ignore it.
The next few weeks were a blur. My dad was seeing Sandy a lot. While it bothered me a little bit, (she wasn't mom), I knew that it had been a long time since my dad had been outside the house. I was more or less happy for him. Trisha and my dad weren't talking at all. She was pissed about it and was threatening to move out. I know she hurt dad's feelings when she made threats like that but I didn't want to get involved in the fight. I figured eventually Trisha would get over it.
Another two weeks went by and Trisha had packed her bags. I couldn't stay out of it and I cried and pleaded for her to stay. My dad was stoic about the whole thing and I was furious with him for allowing it to happen. I screamed at both of them and stalked off to my room where I cried myself to sleep.
The next morning, I was surprised to see that Trisha was still at home. She was cooking breakfast and smiling and acting normal. I wondered what had happened but didn't want to ask for details. Dad was acting really strange, he looked as though he'd seen a ghost. I had no idea what had happened between them but dad didn't go out with Sandy again.
I didn't find out until four months later when I stumbled upon something that changed my life.
