It was a dark and stormy night. Cliche, but true.
I laid in the bed, listening to the rain, and waiting for sleep to come claim me. So, that I could visit the world where he would belong to me instead of her.
I love my Mom. Don't get me wrong. And she has had it so rough that she deserved something special when she left the sperm donor that caused me to exist. I refuse to call that asshole "father".
But, I saw him first, dammit.
Ok, maybe not. But, I didn't know when I did see him that they were already a couple.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
Mom had taken me shopping for clothes for school. I was fourteen and would much rather be in the bookstore next door.
"Fine." Mom sighed, finally, while we were in line to pay. "Go ahead."
I probably left a doppler effect in my wake. Getting out of the store and next door. I made a beeline for my favorite section and began scanning for new books by my favorite authors.
"Can I help you find something?"
I half turned, prepared to explain, yet again, that I was older than I looked and didn't need the children's books thanks when I saw him.
It wasn't that his clothes fit him badly, mind you. Quite the contrary, actually, as that shirt molded itself to his broad shoulders and tapered to tuck into pants that hugged every curve of his thick, muscular legs. He just looked like he should be on a beach somewhere in nothing but a speedo. Probably selling something.
My mouth felt like all the moisture had been sucked out of it. What the hell was he doing in my bookstore, in my little town?
"Everything all right?"
"Fine." I answered faintly, my eyes fixating on those grey eyes. "Just fine. How are you?"
"I'm good, thank you for asking." He smiled and I felt like I had just melted into a puddle. "Were you looking for anything in particular? Or just browsing?"
"Browsing," I said. The wrong answer as he nodded and turned and walked away.
I hated to see him leave. But, watching him go was a real treat as those slacks bunched around the nicest butt I had seen in my short life.
Hell, it is still the nicest and I've seen a lot more since.
"So, did you find anything?" Mom interrupted dreams that I didn't really understand as yet.
How can I put this nicely? I was a bit... behind my classmates in the division between boys and girls and exactly what it meant for me personally.
Oh, I understood where babies came from and such. Probably better than my classmates since I actually took the time to read.
Sorry. That was ugly and uncalled for.
Anyway, I knew the mechanics. But, why exactly a girl would want to let a boy do those things to her was beyond me. At least until I met him.
Losing a school girl crush to your Mom, sucks. I don't know how else to say it.
I'm not much into melodrama. But, my fourteen year old self wanted to die when he came to the house one evening just as I had dreamed and then took my mom out to dinner.
The thing is, a lot of things get crushed. But, sometimes, like with coal for example, the more you try to crush it, the stronger it becomes.
You see, he didn't just look good. He read. And as he spent more time around my mother, he spent more time around me as well. And we had similar taste in books. And smart? I truly believe that he could have been or done anything he wanted to.
I remember this one science project I had...
Never mind. You are already wondering when I'm going to get back to that dark and stormy night, I'm sure. I'll get there. But, it's important to me that you see why I did what I did.
Anyway, he was quite a bit younger than Mom. Actually, he was closer to my age than he was to hers.
I started to have these fantasies that he would see me and decide that he wanted me instead of her.
I think if he had, I would have gotten over him. But, it was still a fantasy I had.
That house of cards came tumbling down when they married when I was sixteen. I know it probably puzzled him when I pulled him aside and begged him to make Mom happy and then cried on his chest until his shirt was soaked. He had no idea how hard it was for me to keep my mouth shut when the preacher asked if there was anyone who saw any reason these two should not be joined. But, saying "because I want him" at your own mother's wedding is a bit much.
I think I'll skip over the next two years. Let's just say I didn't take the disappointment well and acted out a little.
The big climax, if I may be permitted the pun, was when the cops pulled me out of a van with a lot of alcohol and no clothing. And I was the only girl with six boys.
I suppose you might say that I was trying to find the quality he had in quantity.
The courts decided I needed to go away for awhile. I came home on my eighteenth birthday. He picked me up at the bus station.
When he hugged me and kissed the top of my head and told me that he had missed me, it did what two years of acting out and three months of that place couldn't.
It broke me totally. I cried into his shirt once more like a hurt child. I don't know how long I cried, but the bus had left once more and we were the only people still standing around that didn't work there.
"Come on." He said gently. "Let me take you home."
Home. He was my home. No matter what, I would not forget that again.
At home, though, things were strange. Mom had decorated and baked a cake. And both seemed really really happy to see me. But, there was a ... tension between them that I didn't understand.
Finally, I got Mom alone.
"Mom?" I asked. "Is everything okay between you and Dad?"
"Of course, it is sweetie." Mom busied herself picking up the debris from our dinner. "What a thing to ask."
"Mom?" I got up and wormed my way under her arm. I twisted my head to look up at her as I clasped my hands around her waist. "Mom, you know I'll just ask him if you don't tell me."
"And he would probably tell you too." She sighed. "You two always were like two peas in a pod."
I was startled to see a tear trickle from Mom's eye.
"Mom, you're scaring me." I said.
"Oh, honey. It'll be fine." She said, giving me a brisk hug and wiping at her eyes. "We just got a little surprise is all."
I knew that they had wanted other kids besided me. But, this didn't seem like a happy surprise.
"What kind of surprise?" I asked.
"Well, you know how we've been trying to give you a little brother or sister." Mom said. "Well, that won't be happening."
"And that is fine with me."
We both jumped at his deep voice right behind us. His strong arms slid around both of us and held us tight.
"I am perfectly content with my perfect wife." He kissed mother's head. "And my perfect daughter." He kissed mine. "And our perfect little family just the way it is."